In LKJ's situation he's never tried, in mine I've hung out with this girl like 5 or 6 times ever and gone in for the kiss 2 of those, and with a bad result last time. I will obv try to make contact and flirt but I still kinda think being overly aggressive would be bad.

Oh **** I just realized that the cooking thing won't work, she has sorority rush stuff to do all day til 8, which is around when we're going to the movie. I think I will just cook for myself and maybe my roommate and just talk about it and suggest that I cook for/with her sometime soon.

Hey thanks for that.

the "it would be nice to see a boy" comment seems to me she is into you. why didnt you try to kiss her when you were cuddling on the couch?


edit to add: i mean she is dropping pretty big hints imo. "im cold" is a nice way of saying get over here and cuddle. the movie line was a big hint too.

also, just in general, its better (imo) when she is dropping hints like that to not address them directly. for example, the movie hint. she says "o0o0o0o i wanna see that!" and you say "are you dropping a hint that you want me to take you to that?" and she says "sure let's go!" and you say "ok ill let you know about it". youve now effectively ended the conversation. there isn't really anything else she can say in response to that other than "ok cool " then you are stuck sitting there together still. imo it would be better to say something along the lines of, "yeah that looks ok [change subject to a related one]" like, yeah that looks OK, i always love tarantino movies. kill bill was awesome. then you can continue to have conversation. then the next day you can tell her you looked up some times for the movie and you are gonna take her, and she can swoon over the fact that you were actually listening!

the line you played about her being cold while kinda cheesy wasn't so bad. there's no reason to give an excuse as to not turning up the heat, just turn up the heat between the two of you (zing!). she clearly understands that given your history with the "let's just be friends" thing that she is gonna need to drop some hints, which she is doing imo.

+1. Go for it. I realize that I have no real authority to say such things given my posts in this thread, but I do agree completely with yeota here. These sound like big hints.

I'm a lot more comfortable mocking the high schooler for not talking to the girl, since I'm at least able to approach and talk to girls just fine.

yeah im eagerly awaiting his TR after his mom makes him a snack when he gets home

Ya Stinger, I think you are good to go. Just be confident.

pull up your highstakesdatabase page and excuse yourself to the bathroom.

stinger, this is very simple. she friend zoned you because you acted asexually. if you don't show that you're a sexual being, she's never going to think of you in a sexual manner. and when she drops hints, you're acting passive, timid, not confident.

she's in a sorority for god's sakes, and she seems to like you. stop treating her like a goddamn friend and stop being a goddamn wussy who's afraid to show her that you want to escalate things. women like it when guys cook and she wouldn't be with you and drop the hints if she didn't like you, so you shouldn't have too much trouble turning things up several notches if you begin to show that you are confident in your own attractiveness and are not afraid to escalate things.

Once you demonstrate that you do not hesitate to escalate things because you are a sexual, confident, being who is naturally attractive to women, she will stop having to push you (which women hate) to initiate the sexual interactions and will be glad that she actually found a man who knows what he wants and is not afraid to go after it instead of a wussy little boy who wants to hide his sexual interest out of fear of offending her.

or, on the other hand, as long as you continue to act super passive and act like her little nice friend, she will think of you as a nice friend and won't be sexual with you.

this is actually a decent post. a little harshly worded, but i'd be a hypocrite for getting on anyone like that.

although i do submit that you don't necessarily have to escalate things to a sex level, you should escalate them somewhat physically.

stinger i agree with your idea to take it slow, and if she continues to be pretty flirty as she has been, then i would say switch gears and head in, but as for now i think its a good idea to keep playing your regular game, cuz hell she turned you down once before, so its natural to let some time pass to make sure you guys are on the same page

yeota,

Thanks for the advice, but fwiw the convo never really died or anything, it was pretty free flowing. I guess I should also had that we hung out at my place for about 5 hours and I made her laugh pretty consistently throughout this time. I agree that it looks pretty good but just trying to not raise my expectations too high given previous history. I will def try to escalate some at the movies but I'm also curious to see how she reacts when we're buying the tickets. I spoke to a friend and I think he gave some good advice there, basically "if she goes out of her way to try to pay on her own, she prob isn't interested in more than friends. If she lets me pay or makes a halfassed attempt to pay her half, then I'm good"....agree with this? But yeah, I agree that she seems to be dropping some signals, and if that keeps up I agree that I should be more aggressive.

meh, almost every girl will insist that she pays for herself

I understand how the flow of the convo but 2 questions... How should I find out her name, or should I be like and you are x correct? Also, should I ask her out right there, or ask to go bowling with the mutual friend, or aks for her #... I will be asking her tomorrow, so help me out with some ****. Oh btw, anything I should say to her about her being cute or anything?

i would just introduce yourself, she will probably tell you her name. thats what 100% of the population does when they meet someone.

and asking her out the first time you meet her would be LOL bad. just talk to her for a minute. then set up bowling with your mutual friend and other people. then the second time you talk to her, you can be like, "hey me and Y are going bowling, you should join".

ok well I planned on doing that but some other idiot said ask her out right there?

Ok here is the plan. I leave after my 4th hour class, when she is going to her 5th hour which is Gym I see her walking, b/c we walk the same way.. Just figured out this today.

So....... Hey, I'm tml you are x's friend right? then she says yeah..And I say????

oh and...she is like 2.5 yrs younger then me. so is that bad?

maybe i remember highschool wrong, but i had no problem talking to people i saw in the hallways. just freaking talk to her. about anything (you can talk about your mutual friend, whatver). then when she has to go one way and you go the other, you can be like "i have to go this way, see ya later". and thats that.

Minor follow-up since I mentioned I was texting the girl to see if she wanted to grab dinner tonight.

She responds, "I just finished my homework and actually have a bit of a headache...so I will take a rain check on dinner. Maybe next week if that's okay."

For what it's worth, I'm 99% sure that the headache thing is sincere, since (1) she seems to get them frequently and (2) it's not like she was shrugging me off altogether.

I'll follow up soon on getting more plans together.

I don't have a problem talking to girls at all. But I just have never met this girl and she doesn't know me. I asked a good friend of mine who is a girl, and she said yeah it would be kind of weird if a guy just came right up to me.

so I want to make sure I can have a good starting point.

once you introduce yourself talk about whatever the **** you want man, jesus you are hopeless

lol sorry....ok so tell me the best possible way to start the convo? And if I ask her if she wants to go bowling, should I get her # right then?

Dude. Nobody is going to be able to say, "THIS IS THE PERFECT OPENING THAT WILL GET YOU LAID," then follow through with something magical. You've gotten suggestions, use those or use your own ideas.

Regardless, it's obvious that you're beyond the help of anyone here.

HOLY ****

HI. IM TOOMANYLETTERS. YOURE X RIGHT? I SEE THAT WE HAVE THIS MUTUAL FRIEND Y.

or you might as well be yourself and say

ummmm hey.... so yeah im toomanyletters. i went on a message board and asked everyone to spoonfeed me exactly what to say to you because despite the fact that you are 2.5 years younger than me i am incredibly intimidated by you. i usually watch you walk around but i have no balls and am afraid to talk to you. now that ive got that out of the way, can i have your number so i can never call you because i will debate with my internet friends exactly what to say. maybe i can skype with one of them and put you on speaker so they can feed me lines. can we have sex now?

I'd post another sarcastic comment but I'd start to feel bad.

i dont get why these young kiddos come on here and ask for advice, dont answer questions people ask them which will help give the advice, then shoot down the advice and complain that no one is helping. just listen to the answers people are giving you.