I say that I'm apathetic...


and now I have a massage date set up with a 20 year old mom. shes really hot. bucket list check incoming hopefully.

I'd post pictures but somebody will probably try to trainwreck me so HUD

I've been sharing every intimate detail about my online dating experience from day one. It's only when I found some success that the haters materialized. Not surprising, actually; I mentioned to SG tonight that I thought about posting the pics of her blowing me on the "live blog" but thought better of it because the guys here don't deserve it... relative to outing her

That's bc ur a buttoned up dweeb. Let loose a bit and my posts starting making a hella sense.

I find that ATF has gotten more tolerable to me. I was cringing through his posts before this new persona shone through, but now I just lol atf

That's such a bull**** argument. The great majority ITT are congratulatory when others find success.

If ppl don't like atf why not just skip past reading his posts? I reckon I read 2/3 and skip the 1/3 because I have no idea which chick is which.

Atf could you post a list of the girls you've been seeing and discussing and write a mini bio/history to remind me (us) who is who?

just link to your blog. it's a win-win for errbody.

LOL at the ATF haters. Keep on keepin' on, sir.

Also, NH Wutang.

YC - 32 yo black chick that doesn't put out. She lets me finger bang her and let me jerk off on her.

CHB - 30 yo went to my HS, parents know one another, we were neighbors at one time... yet we didn't know one another and met on OKC. Weak makeout sessions, once called me up at midnight to say she had fun and wants me plan a fun date, disappeared for a month or two because she was exclusive with someone, reappeared when they broke it off

AH - 30 yo student / performance artist / dominatrix who I make out with, do her website, finger a bit, etc. Has a bf of 3 years who she loves but doesn't see herself with forever. Friend for life.

IG - 42 yo yoga instructing neighbor who picked me up. went over to her place on first date, banged. 2nd date, 3some with another neighbor.

SG - 36 yo possible soul mate; deleted OKC profile for her and feel amazing chemistry with her... sexual and otherwise. Likes it rough, likes me to nut on her face, likes to take pictures of us fooling around. I told her last night that how I feel about her makes me realize how ridiculous I thought I felt about any other woman.

No blog yet but I'm considering writing The Great American Online Dating Novel. Polar Vortex of Pussy :: "But I'm A Relationship Guy..."

Quick TR from Monday

SG and I spend the weekend mostly together and have a very fun time. She leaves around 7PM Monday and I'm pretty smashed and feeling very social at that point. I call IG and she says come over. I go over and begin missing SG so in my drunken idiocy I decide to speakerphone SG. I do not recollect the conversation. There's also a really butchy looking female over too. Next thing I know I've stumbling drunk knocked over the vase holding the flowers I got for IG for vday. It breaks. She begins to flip out at me and assaults me, pummeling me HARD. I leave. I have a big welt on the back of my head (it hurts to shampoo) and my left rib cage is really sore.

SG is upset at the call and expresses it via text the next day, yesterday. I apologize and we meet up briefly on my lunch. We talk things through and later have a long phone convo Tuesday evening. IG, while I haven't called her, is not responding to my text where I apologize for being a drunk buffoon. Oh well.

The evening, if anything, was a wake up call that it's time to take control again of my alcohol intake.

ATF,

lol

Just giving his audience what they want.

I think the real issue is that this thread was helpful, defo made me jump in & helped with a lot the niggly stuff (except I totally got overbooked) that I prob would have found helpful. Now it's not helpful anymore and kind of a carcrash.

There are a few people popping in asking for help but being overrun by WU (no offence) and ATF.

WU is a decent bloke, but he clearly doesn't need help with this.
The other dick is just an attention whore and a carcrash that very much needs help of a different kind.

Lock it up on contain the crap in another thread imo. Most of the people posting decent advice had gone anyway.

Agreed ATF is making this thread unreadable. Wu is alright but he does overrun the thread @ times by just posting 24/7. The dude is absolutely relentless in his posting lol but nobody comes close to being the thread disease that ATF is

hey, first girl i would bang responded to me on okcupid and i wanna know what are your classical lines/strategies in this situation (thats where i usually **** up irl) before i respond.

btw shes a 21 canadian exchange student here (brussels) for 6 months who apparently likes to drink (there is a pic of her drinking beer), also the beard, nihilist, skating and butter lines are in reference of her profil page.

me :

hey, im compelled by your charm and havent shaved for 5 days...
We should go out for a drink

me (2days later):

Tabarnak! My beard is getting thicker and you are still not responding.
Arent you interested into knowing a little bit more about an handsome stranger?
Btw i decided that you are really good at being a nihilist, skating and butter churning.


her :
Ok here I am answering you!

Well golly gee, you're actually very cute. I might want to know more about you.

You got 2/3 right: I'm not good at butter churning... Frankly I only think the Amish are still into that kind of labour.

me:
?

I would open by cracking a joke about only getting 2/3 right and transition into asking a question about her under the guise of wanting to get to know her a little better so you can go 3/3 next time or something.

Basically, once you get the girl to respond to your opener you have to transition the convo to one with more substance while still keeping it fun.

I did this in the initial messaging with my current GF under the pretext we were going to be starring in a sitcom together. So I asked her a bunch of questions about her that I needed to know in order to come up with a sitcom etc... Achieved the goal of getting to know her while keeping it light and fun. Now 5 months later we still joke about what to call our sitcom.

Oh wow, dontdoitpls, the sitcom idea is gold. Definitely considering adding that to my repertoire.

Last week I wrote about a date that dragged on a little too long in an area I didn't know anything about. We sent some texts back and forth but I didn't sense much interest from her so didn't bother asking her out again (coupled with the fact that I have all of these other possibilities). If she wrote me I would snap accept, but I don't see that happening. But I do appreciate the advice I got, especially about keeping it short and not dragging.

So in an hour I have the first of four first dates in four days. The first two are drinks, meeting at 8 pm. I don't have any pretense to cut it short, but will try to avoid it dragging on too long. I could always say I have to work early the next morning (I work from home and my schedule is all over the place). The other two have definite end times since she has to go to work in one case and I have to go to a party in the other case.

Quick preview, will give trip reports later:
Tonight - we sent each other pretty long messages about detailed intellectual topics. She has only casual sex/new friends/short-term dating listed and is (I think from reading between the lines of her profile) poly, as am I. Meeting at a bar a 15 minute walk from me.

Tomorrow - we have been chatting back and forth for about 2.5 weeks. We originally had a date scheduled for last week but she got sick the morning of and messaged me to cancel. It didn't say anything about meeting up again so I gave up hope, but two days later she messaged me saying she was still sick, bored and laying in bed so we chatted a bit since then. No huge connection but I figure why not. Meeting at a bar a 10 minute walk from my place that I've been to a couple of times.

Friday - woman who messaged me with a really nice message mentioning a few things about my profile (including that we are a 99 percent match) and asked me out in that first message, which I accepted in the next one. Nice that it doesn't have to be such hard work if people's profiles have enough info. She mentioned she's poly (and has a bf) in the profile. Has a phd, pretty sporty. Meeting during the day for coffee down the street from me.

Saturday - Meeting at 8 pm on a Saturday, but still casual since I have a birthday party around the corner (in her neck of the woods) so will have to end it after two drinks max. Don't know much about her, doing this one mostly based on looks. We've had mostly superficial conversations till now.

Wildcard - Monday night at a birthday party of a new friend I just met last week (she is the friend of a good friend) chatted with the girl sitting next to me for a long time and got her number... Don't know how old she is but most likely 19 and just finished the German equivalent of high school in May... I'm 30. We'll see...

Good luck Kenny, hope you run good

I was thinking that I was moving towards a relationship with the concealed carry chick. But she canceled our last thing, cooking dinner together, which would have been the third date and presumably the first sex date (we've both given each other oral so far), saying her dog seemed sick, and she hasn't been proactive in rescheduling. I haven't either really, but I kind of want to leave it on her since she was the one that canceled. We have texted some, we just haven't set anything up even loosely

To be quite honest something about the sick dog excuse sounds like bs.

Excellent thank you. I didn't even realise yc existed and couldn't distinguish between ig/sg and thought they both in your threesome

That thought had occurred to me

I've been sending "trynna get the pipe?" to several Tinder matches. When they predictably say "wtf!" or "you're disgusting," I say "the pipe in Super Mario. What the heck did you think I was talking about?"

Results have been pretty good

So just back from this date. We met at the bar (both of us ended up being early... German punctuality ftw) when it was almost empty. We had some cozy seats on a huge couch (like 15 feet long) and stayed there for 3 drinks (about 3 hours) as the bar filled up and they played some good music. At first the convo was pretty light, though at the end she asked me a pretty direct question about something in my profile (and we had touched on in the messages) about gender roles. At first she seemed a little confused about my answer, but then she was just shocked to learn about the gender roles in dating in the US.

For example, I told her the story of a liberal, educated, independent female friend of mine who, even after 3 years of dating her boyfriend, still expected him to pay for every single meal, even if it wasn't a date, and was shocked when she saw another couple (also friends of ours that had been together for three years, and where she had a better financial situation than him) pay separately at subway when we were all on a roadtrip together. Additionally she was floored that on first dates from online the guy is sometimes expected to foot a decent sized dinner bill on his own.

Now that that tangent is done, we ended up walking back to the train station by my house with our arms around each other, kissed a bit while waiting for the light to change, and made out a bit more waiting for the train before saying goodbye. No concrete plans to meet, but we'll see each other soon I'm sure.

Glad to hear things seem to be positively moving forward for ya Kenny. Just gotta keep at it.

I also think it's fine not to make concrete plans at the end of the date. Give it a day to make sure you wanna see her again and go from there

Meeting up with a super cute chick from Tinder tonight. The only girl I've asked out to hang with from that damn app. WISH ME LUCK, BOYS!