Listen to Mullen. She'll get the hint eventually (in theory).

So I guess my asking "pics of friends?" when she asked me to go to some crap with her friends was snarky and bitchy? I kinda don't care, it was awesome.

I actually thought this line was hilarious.

It might be funny but he was still being a douche.

I don't disagree, and two wrongs don't make a right, but the event I was invited to was almost surely girl and five guys holding up her ego, let's see if she can get some validation by dragging back in another bitch guy (me). If you treat the invitation as sincere, then my response was pretty classless. But if you recognize it for what it is, I think my response was appropriate.

Although you could argue that it shows I still care, I was trying to be jarring, but also to make it clear that I wasn't a lapdog for silliness. It's probably best if I just didn't respond.

Anyways, I essentially double-posted this now, so my bad. Thanks for the double love, LT.

Experience is from Beijing and not Shanghai so might be a bit different.

The girls that are with the "ballers" in the clubs are mostly hires, and will not be interested in the group they're with, though hard to persuade to leave that group.

If there's one, let's say "ugly" guy at the table who seems to be calling the shots he most likely is the one with the money who hired the girls (or the club takes care of it for him, in return for him spending like crazy.)

Be aware not to piss these off, they don't appreciate western guys taking the Chinese girls and there were gangs going around Beijing wrecking any foreigner out with a Chinese girl while I was there.

I hope your living situation in Shanghai is better than mine in Beijing, we had a secluded dorm and weren't allowed any guests after 10pm (guards all over, and only other way in was to climb a crumbling wall which has won some of the fights to climb it, so to speak.)

The free drinks are fun though, hope the quality is a bit better in Shanghai than it is in Beijing, for the Chinese version of Tinder download "TanTan".

Also, are you learning Chinese while you're there? If not, start if you're staying for a period of 4+ months. It took me two months to get the hang of it but afterwards it's a great convo starter with girls if you're into the Chinese.

Enjoy it over there, I wish I was back there nearly every day.

Great post man, thanks so much!

Everything you say is about the same in Shanghai. I found out that most of the girls at the table are indeed hired by the club and the free alcohol in some of the clubs (like M1nt) is toxic. Makes you completely blackout drunk in maybe 5 shots. Everybody fell for that trap.

Luckily I was warned about the living situation and instead have a nice appartment with some fellow exchange guys I met in Shanghai. I also studied Chinese for a half year and will continue to study Chinese in Shanghai so I can get by. Even though im still very far from any normal conversation in Chinese.

So far there have not been many Chinese girls, but uni starts next week so hopefully I can meet some there.. Luckily it's going ok with the exchange girls. Unfortunately not on GG/Birdman level yet though.

I will be visiting Beijing in a couple of weeks. Any advice?

What does it mean when you ask a girl out to drinks, she replies after 6 days, then I answer and she doesnt respond one day later?

Forget her.

I ask her out to drinks, she accepts, i write her a message. Why the hell would she answe after 6 days in the first place? If she didnt want anything she could just not answer.

DanteA,

In general, if you aren't getting responses from a girl on a very short time frame just move on. As many have discussed in this thread, you need to give off the impression that her message isn't of utmost importance to you. At your stage, you honestly should be trying to talk to as many girls concurrently as possible so that you don't have extreme vested interest in any one of them particularly. You give off a very clingy image just through your posts here, girls will notice that the moment they start talking to you. Don't be that guy.

You are probably right. Why the **** cant people just be rational? If they dont want to talk or meet just say it. This way hurts more.

On a positive note I had six messages on Tinder during the time I trained and a girl even gave her number without me asking. She probably wants to check out who I am.

They have probably tried the honest approach before but guys got butthurt and gave them abuse. Why should they risk telling you theyre not interested? Its easier for them to just not reply and pretend they're busy.

If you were in the same situation i doubt you would be 100% rational too.

lol this was a great post. You two will probably end up drunk ****ing eventually just due to being neighbors. Prob should bring it up to your brother though
+1
+1
+1

TB spent the whole weekend with me. I actually wasn't confident if her trip was for me or for her friends and seeing me was just apart of it. Lots of confusion around that the first 2 1/2 days with me thinking that and me finding out Saturday night in somewhat of a fight that she didn't want to intrude too much (insecurities with how I handled us when we first met) but me wanting her to be more clingy now. It got pretty deep and I think we both understand each other better.

She dressed ridiculously good every night and **** it's exhausting to be around that. She'll literally be like 6'1-6'4 in different heels, if she's not showing cleavage she'll double pad her bra so it adds an insane body ratio and every ****ing guy every where stares at her. Everytime she gets up from the table to go to a bathroom guys will tap their friend to look, etc. Even had some like 70yo lady stop her when we were walking Sunday morning and said "sorry, I'm a hetereosexual woman but that is the sexiest outfit I've ever seen in my life". If you're on my fb, that picture of us I posted today is the Sunday outfit.

I drank Monday, then got really drunk for kickball/Loudpvck at a club Wednesday night (the day before she arrived) and we drank Thurs-Sunday so I was in a weird mood and by Saturday night got pretty tired of it. I would never bring her to clubs if we were dating but since she was here for the weekend I wanted to do as much as possible with different friends. Took her around 3-4 different social circles and they all acted different than they would when she isn't around. Guys all act like it's their one time to shine and turn their energy levels up a ton. Even my best friend leaned into my ear and said "yo you gotta feel like the man right now" when I brought her to the pre dinner before a club. And in my head I'm like not really, kind of just counting the hours until we go home, this is not where I want to bring someone I care about to.

Funniest thing, which has happened consistently since our first date, is someone finds out she trains horses for a living and he/she then go way out of their way to try to share their connection to horses. I just start laughing now because like servers will be like "oh ya my childhood-neighbor's-uncle had a horse and we would ride it over the summer before we went to middle school". It's innocent enough but happens alllllll the time.

TL;DR I understand why people want their gf's to dress down. It's fun for one night but not that many in a row.

Cute Canadian girl I made out with last week sent me a, "you out tonight?" FB message at 2:30am last night. Just woke up and saw it. What's my play?

Wait until 130am and reply "nah, come over."

Also decent chance I'll see her at school today, if that makes any difference.

For Beijing, next to all the standard things (The wall, summer palace, forbidden city and tiananmen square (try to see them either raise or take down the flag, google this)).

Make sure you don't miss the Lama Temple (Buddhist temple, my favourite spot in BJ), Jingshan Park (behind Forbidden City, gives a great overview) and the Hutongs (Iconic streets of BJ).

If they try to sell you on a carriage ride and such just skip it over, the Lonely Planet has a good guide for walking around the Hutongs.

If you've got a lot of time add the 798 Arts Zone and Temple of Heaven (I didn't find them spectacular, but they're worth a visit).

Going out: Wudaokou is where you'll meet most of the students, Sanlitun is the more fancy going out where you'll meet Westerners. Both are good fun, just ask your taxi driver to go to either one and he'll drop you off near the clubs.

When will you be going?

Went to lunch with G and ended up at the same coffee shop as Canadian girl lol. We actually joined her and her friends table and I think I finessed it perfectly.

I asked her what she was up to last night (never responded to the FB message) and she got a little red and said she got "pretty drunk" last night and proceeded to tell me where she went and who with and what not. G is going out of town this weekend so def want to hang with Canadian girl cause she'll be around.

Went out with Canadian girl Saturday and were about each other all night. Danced and made out at the club then went back to her place. Ended up sleeping there but she has a roommate in the same room and wasn't down to have sex with her there . Unreal body though, 5'10 and lean with a great butt. Really hoping I can make that happen in the future.

My buddy introduced me to his new girlfriends best friend 1.5weeks ago. The four of us have hung out on a few different occasions since. Yesterday i asked her out on a date for Tuesday and she accepted. Just today i find out that Tuesday is actually her birthday and she canceled other plans so she could come out on this date.

Am i now supposed to buy her a gift for her birthday? Should i even acknowledge at all that i know it's her birthday? She didn't tell me at all, maybe she didn't want me to know?

Depends on how you found out its her birthday and the plans she cancelled.

If it was her friend that told you,I'd say it's a hint to make it known you know it's her birthday.

Which is a really bad thing,you don't know her real well,and just puts added pressure on the date.

If you can get away with not knowing its her birthday,that's what I'd do,play dumb.

bring flowers, gift gesture but also blended with date gesture and mention that your buddy told you

Do not take flowers.