Go for it. Figuring out what you don’t know is one of the best reasons to write.

I got a bumble match with a girl I dated back in 2013. We went out on 3-4 dates back then, I remember it being good, just fizzled out and I started dating someone else after her. What's the best way to handle reconnecting?

Apparently you can request your swipe data from bumble ie how many people said "yes" and "no" to you and the same for yourself. It's hidden away in the app settings in Contact Us. I just requested mine and given my lack of success am preparing for some major lolz.

I learned this from a reddit thread where a chick posted her #s, showing she swiped right on .8% of profiles (1 out of 125). Pretty sad commentary on dating culture right now that most people in the comments were applauding her; the few people stating that this was an absurd approach and way too selective were downvoted to oblivion.

About to read this. Curious, how capable is medium of generating income if you can build a decent following?

This is valuable information for advertisers. Think of all the cat supplies they could sell.

I'm very new to the game with a small following but those with 10k+ followers can make good money, especially if you're writing about tech/self-improvement/niche topics. My most profitable/viewed article is about flipping free samples for profit as a "side hustle".

If you sign up for a Medium account and read my stuff, it helps me get paid

While we're on the topic - The Craziest 4 Things I've Ever Done To Impress Women

Meow Mix Meow Mix please deliver!

Regarding the writing to a crush that you don't know, I have a similar story.

I had a crush on a girl my senior year of high school, she was a junior, i never had a class with her, never talked to her, only
contact was watching her spectacular ass walk to 4th period.

Seriously, this girl had a luscious ass, way before having a huge hiney was fashionable for white girls.

So the last day of school I placed a note on her car saying how hot she was and how I wanted to meet her and go on a date.

Pretty sure it was extremely cringy, cause she said no, and because a friend of hers mentioned it offhandly a year later.

She had heard the story from hotass one night as she mocked the guy for doing something so lame.

But the friend didn't know it had been me to write that note.

I ended up ****** the friend of hotass a year or so later, we went on a blind date and hit it off, especially since I found out she was hotass' friend.

We did it a lot, and I know hotass heard about me.

She would give me a look every time i saw her with my girlfriend, and never mentioned the note incident.

I never had the urge to try and sleep with her, I found out she was kind of a trainwreck, besides I was getting steady pussy so the urge wasn't that strong.

But I did end up banging her friend at her house during a house party, making sure she caught us.

I was railing my girl doggy in a bedroom, she comes in, so I pulled out and came on my girls back.We had been doing it raw for awhile, my girl didn't like me to wear condoms.

She acted shocked, my girlfriend was embarrassed, I felt strangely powerful and completely over having any feelings for her or her dumper as I looked at her in the eye as I came (to establish dominance).



whatever

Been a while since I've posted but the gf and I are still together.. Been almost a year and a half since we met at this point. We moved in together 3 months ago and its going well now. It was super rough there for a bit right before and after the move. We are going to Florida tomorrow for like 8 days to do some snorkling and ride some jet skis.

congrats

but damn

I can't stop laughing at this.

This whole story is insanely cringe.

Damn, those are good. The Tommy Boy one is pretty elite.

I was going for wholesome, but thanks!

whatever

As the Wholesome Mod of the SE Forum, I enjoyed it, fwiw.

Come on the story is A+, partially because of the cringe.

I never did the online thing but I've shared 2 super cringey stories that were hilarious at the time but a complete trainwreck after the dust settled

Thank u, just the thought of you guys support keeps me from killing myself. Thank you.

whatever

Great story, I lol-ed

Most stuff we do in HS/college is cringey. It’s all good.

I do think there’s an inverse of the Rounders quote “every player can remember with remarkable accuracy the outstanding tough beats of his career” - but applied to dating: Plenty(?) of dudes remember the torrid details of their best blowjob, dirtiest deed, whatever it was that you were especially proud of during those coming-of-age years.

The “I looked at her in the eye as I came (to establish dominance)” might not necessarily be an instance of that for Eeyorefora, but it probably would have been for me.

if you are a mod then you know what to undo to make things right from a few years ago




eye, LMAO thats funny

Hopefully this is my to-date magnum opus, but strapping in my seatbelt for the hot takes to come

I’ve Tracked All My First Dates For The Past 3 Years In A Spreadsheet — Here’s What I Learned About Myself

Next one relative to this will be looking at the locations/timing/$$$ spent to see if there are any sort of trends I may be missing

Cool post. Interesting that you and I have similar looking for / not looking for qualifiers. I'm divorced (~4 years ago) with kids so that adds an additional wrinkle but my experience has been very similar over the last 2.5 years.

I've found that, as how I value myself has increased over time, how much less bullshit I'm willing to put up with. For online dating now, I'm very up front about the fact that I have kids, am not looking for hookups, and some things that are very important to me in a partner. This has led to much better overall experiences on first dates which is about as ideal as it gets. Like you mention in your post, no one owes anything beyond that, and if it leads to a second date or more, that's a bonus.

2nd date conversions seem pretty low. I'm 5 for 23 since ending things with my ex girlfriend. I actually had first date sex with one girl which hasn't led to a second date as of yet.

FWIW, I'm a few weeks from my 34th birthday and the same height as you. My dates have been between the ages of 21 and 28.

I did that for 1.5 years for the people I slept with but gave up. Turns out I'm too much of a whore.

Also, one leak you have is always following up the next day. Make up some fake excuse that you have busy next day or some fake trip and then you can text them in 2-3 days and seem more interesting and less needy

Good stuff Burdz.

One thing that occurred to me while reading was that it doesn’t seem like you’re having a lot of fun on these first dates. I mean, yea, sometimes there are some aspects that are unavoidably exhausting and frustrating. Maybe you are having fun and I’m just drawing a poor inference; my bad if that’s the case.

Side note: good to see that the Medium app has improved their interface. Years ago it would be that a third of the screen would be ads and menus...how the f does that make for a pleasurable reading experience...

Did I indicate that I always followed up next day? I don't have a hard and fast rule, but generally, wait at least 24 hours after to follow up. Seems strange in 2021 when my date says something like "text me to let me know you got home safe".

I often took 1-2 days to respond to non-urgent texts from the last person I saw for a few weeks (a mix of ambivalence towards her and not loving texting back and forth). When guilt set in about taking a while to respond, I foolishly told her I felt bad about it and she soon lost interest after (which ultimately was fine since I was on the fence the entire time anyway).