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idiotic / narcissistic / annoying facebook statuses idiotic / narcissistic / annoying facebook statuses

10-27-2012 , 12:02 AM
Karl's an idiot though. That grandma picture is a parody.
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10-27-2012 , 12:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Karl.
half a million likes

Javen Reid should be exterminated right on the spot, wherever you find him.
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10-27-2012 , 12:18 AM
Cathy Wynn Lemons Chaney has made quite a name for herself.
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10-27-2012 , 01:49 AM
Quote:
Yolo
Married or not you should read this...


“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. lms and be safe ♥
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Katie Draper So heartbreaking!
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Susy Neorchik Omg I'm crying
a few seconds ago · Like

Last edited by suzzer99; 10-27-2012 at 02:00 AM.
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10-27-2012 , 03:59 AM
Wish i didn't read that crap. Holy ****ing ****
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10-27-2012 , 04:50 AM
Yolo suzzer yolo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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10-27-2012 , 07:22 AM
Suzzer showing how you win a thread.
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10-27-2012 , 08:07 AM
Damnit I'm an idiot. Thought the 'like' button wasn't working on that FB post.
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10-27-2012 , 11:02 AM


She's a 19yo waitress who works part time as a promo model. She is much better at posing in bikinis than I imagine she would be at flying a plane... or finding someone on facebook with a plane who wants to teach her to fly... after also teaching her to drive?

She's hot if any of you happen to have a private plane and some free time though?

Last edited by SwoopAE; 10-27-2012 at 11:20 AM.
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10-27-2012 , 11:23 AM
I hope she crashes.
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10-27-2012 , 11:28 AM
in related news, i'm looking for someone to teach me how to throw a football and also design zone coverage schemes for div i college ball. please pm if anyone have some free time.
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10-27-2012 , 11:29 AM
How to fly airplane in the future?

"Yes, I'm a time traveler and a pilot, I can help."
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10-27-2012 , 11:35 AM
@diego But then who will randomly post pictures of herself in lingerie on my facebook feed

I have some other amazing fb friends for these, i'll look through and take some pics maybe. A bunch of epic fail food porn, the usual narcissistic stuff and attention whoring etc
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10-27-2012 , 12:04 PM
Statuses from the past 2 weeks. Yes, this is only 2 weeks. There are at least two or three like this every week dating back a couple years.



Yes. Pretty little lairs. She has referenced it at least five times in the past month in statuses. Every time it is spelled lairs.

The past has already happened. Glad we cleared that up.

Guess how many of the 15 likes are men who post 'omg ur so beautiful' on all of her pictures. Also, lolattentionwhoring.

Also, the day off plan sounds super thrilling, and the day off plans are regular occurrences, featuring the same things.

She literally has 4000 pictures on facebook including 400 or so profile pictures. Here's a sample of some of her profile pictures (note, these are profile pictures, not taken from random albums)





It is also littered with the image macros from in thread and assorted food porn (although nowhere near as bad as some of my other facebook friends on the food)
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10-27-2012 , 12:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by suzzer99

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.



My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain.
I have a feeling the son was going to fail those exams regardless.
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10-27-2012 , 12:08 PM
but i mean, i can see why you still have her as a friend
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10-27-2012 , 12:21 PM
She looks cute.
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10-27-2012 , 12:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by J0hny
She looks cute.
I thought some threadsavers were necessary, and fortunately her profile pictures deliver in a totally different way to her statuses.

If you can teach her to fly airplane in the future I can introduce you?
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10-27-2012 , 01:04 PM
I’m too far away probably, but thx for the offer
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10-27-2012 , 02:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SwoopAE





It is also littered with the image macros from in thread and assorted food porn (although nowhere near as bad as some of my other facebook friends on the food)
2, 3, 1
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10-27-2012 , 02:53 PM
Does her house lean at a 45-degree angle?
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10-27-2012 , 03:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SwoopAE
Statuses from the past 2 weeks. Yes, this is only 2 weeks. There are at least two or three like this every week dating back a couple years.



Yes. Pretty little lairs. She has referenced it at least five times in the past month in statuses. Every time it is spelled lairs.

The past has already happened. Glad we cleared that up.

Guess how many of the 15 likes are men who post 'omg ur so beautiful' on all of her pictures. Also, lolattentionwhoring.

Also, the day off plan sounds super thrilling, and the day off plans are regular occurrences, featuring the same things.

She literally has 4000 pictures on facebook including 400 or so profile pictures. Here's a sample of some of her profile pictures (note, these are profile pictures, not taken from random albums)





It is also littered with the image macros from in thread and assorted food porn (although nowhere near as bad as some of my other facebook friends on the food)
She needs complete anal annihilation, followed by the Misery treatment on her ugly feet.

Do not want.
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10-27-2012 , 03:39 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ungoliant
Does her house lean at a 45-degree angle?
haha, seriously, wtf?
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10-27-2012 , 03:45 PM
Swoop - you got your hatred across really well in that post. I really enjoyed it, thanks.

Please post her food pics. This thread needs more food porn fails.
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10-27-2012 , 08:04 PM
a 30 year old man just said that he was going out to din-din
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