NL3/5
I won a big pot with aces and old tight nit says man "i dont know about that play, i think its better to limp pre with aces, you get max value as they never see it coming."

different fat old guy: 50bb pot, on flop the guy jams into PFR 250bb with gutter, and gets called by JJ (overpair) and when he loses the pot he says, "i had to push, the implied odds were huge"

Expressing amazement that someone is sitting ~500BB deep is hardly absurd poker thinking. Unless you really think he didn't understand the concept of table stakes.

Hell, I can imagine saying this when I sit down if I've been watching a fish on a heater, to get the lol glasstapaments out of my system.

Actually, someone who says something like this is probably right - he'll be distracted by ongoing coverage of the event and won't play his A game. (Not that his A game is necessarily any good.)

So of course you made sure to figure out if he plays AK any differently from AA/KK postflop, right?

I get tilted every time I remember this story. Can't blame you for trading blows with this a-hole, but I genuinely think he could have been ignorant enough not to realize what he was doing. Not that it makes it any better.

Long story short. 1/3 NL. 3 way all in. Shorter of stacks ($300 started hand with), calls his hand and says 2 pair on Q8825 board. Q7 gets shown and 3rd guy who takes down $180 side pot w/ 9 high asks to see the other guys hand. The once mucked hand gets flipped up and is shown QJ and now plays. Ships pot. Side and main pot. Main pot all in w/ Q7 goes berserk at the ruling and the idiot 9 high.

After check/calling the whole way down in a 5/10 limit game a older lady rolls over 10 5 off on a board of 6 9 8 4 7 "The reason I called is you cant make a straight without a 10 or a 5." My response you cant do it with both.

Playing private $2/5 game. Player raises, gets 3bet, third player flats the 3bet, original raiser shoves for $800, 3bettor calls all in and both flip up AA before the third player acts. Third player, who always sounds drunk and dumb with a thick east Texas accent, says "well, they're holding each other's outs (as if AA needed "outs")" and proceeds to call off $800 with KK and of course wins the pot.

Wasting time playing 3/6 lhe waiting for tourney to start, 4 limpers, I have 34 in the SB, BB check, 18 in the pot. Flop comes J-5-2 for the OESD, I check, two bettors, a fold, 24 in the pot, I call for 3 (BB folds).

Turn an Ace, I check-call both bettors again.

River the 6, I check, UTG bets, a call, I raise, UTG (old crusty guy) grumbles and calls, other guy folds. I show the straight. Old guy mutters "calling with garbage the whole way, game of skill my ass."

hahahaha that's a pretty absurd check/call indeed.

My mistake, got those backwards. 6 on turn, A on river. That would be absurd.

I hear this one regularly - "Wash the cards!".

Playing 1/2, 2 guys get HU, are all in on the flop, first guy has TPTK and other guy has 9hi flush draw. The guy with the flush draw says, "that's okay, it's a coinflip". I would love flip coins with him.

Played with a guy recently who kept saying he hated aces as they were "bad luck"

He then went on to build a huge stack by hitting boats on the flop playing 56 OS.

I'd love it if you had posted that the board in this hand were A7o versus 9h8h on a board of 7h-3h-2c

And yet... She did...

"Thank you! If you hadn't raised I would've had to play this hand, and now I can fold."

No, thank YOU for your money, ma'am/sir.

Sorry if this one is already in this thread.

Is that really the most absurd thing you've heard !? Sometimes, I will be involved in a multiway pot and I will sense weakness from the guy taking the initiative... I know I have to raise, even though I've got nothing. But then another guy raises, giving me the easy decision... Or when I'm running bad, and I know I've got odds to make a speculative call with a drawing hand, even though I know deep down I'm not gonna hit it...

A lot of people would rather make an easy fold than a close call. The more obvious your decisions are, the less likely you'll make a mistake, fwiw.

/threadderailment

This is pretty absurd IMO...

$50+12 buy in at Trop in AC on the 31st. I was getting shortstacked having won 2 whole pots the entire time so with blind at 300-600 and two limpers I shoved 7k into the pot from the SB with JJ. Everyone folds. The very next hand there is a min raiser pre and a called. I shove again, this time with AQss. Original min raiser calls (now has over half his stack in the pot) and shows down 10 6dd. His reponse to someone asking why he called with ten high: "He shoved the previous hand so I thought he was bluffing."

??

Got berated for calling an all-in pf from a 15BB stack after I raised to 4x this weekend. I had A-K suited and had about 300BB's behind. We were the only two players in.

Short stack has J-J. Board bricks, but I nail the Ace ball on the river.

Guy berating me was the short stack's friend and was just glaring at me shaking his head since "this isn't tournament, can't believe donkies playing A-K like that" and "he can not believe I called off with only A high since I have barely anything invested." I gave him an eyebrow raise which turned into a jaw drop when the J-J reloads for the full amount (100BB since this is LA). Why are you playing 15BB's?

Five hands later, the friend who continues to babble about "needing to play the numbers" and "he would never call there since I was getting ****ty pot odds" calls with a flush draw going to the river (2 clubs in his hand, no pair) only getting 2.3 to 1. Of course, he hits it, but his well-concealed (read: OBVIOUS) tarp is foiled by his opponent with the two pair checking behind after his check. He smugly turned over his cards and shot a look my way as if to say "yeah, that's how you play."

I made sure to stay invested in my iPod and take a big interest in reading the outrageous rake structure on top of the drop box so I would not tap the tank.

Why yes, Ms. Morissette, I do think it is ironic.

I was playing 1/2 at the Peppermill in Reno this past weekend. There was a guy at the table who was doing a lot of table talk about how he used to be a pro but went broke because, "There's too much luck in the game" and a bunch of other BS which basically summed up to, "I suck at poker."

Then I got into a hand with him. The table was very loose and preflop raises were on the big size, even for a 1/2 game. MP raises it to 15, a couple callers, and I have AcKc in one of the blinds. I make it 50 to go and get one caller. We both started with about 300. The flop comes 6x 7c 9c and I bet $75 at it. He calls. The turn was a blank (2h) and I was hoping another bet would take it down. I bet $125 and he shoves for another 60 or so. I called and the river brought an ace. He said, "You win, I just have a pair of eights," and when I showed my hand he went nuts. He was sure he was beat but put it in there hoping for that 6 outer on the river - can't imagine why this fool went broke.

He started bitching about how I "got there" on the river like all the other idiots. (I had 15 outs, duh). Plus, he had the 8c in his hand and he wouldn't have made that move if he hadn't. He went on and on for about 15 minutes. I ignored it all and just hoped I could get into it again with him.

His best line - "You can't beat bad players."

What 6 outer?

More likely:
overpair/set of 7s or 6s: 10 outs
Vs flush draw: ahead
AK unsuited trying to steal the pot: way ahead
Vs set of 9s: 2 outs

Not likely:
Vs 9-10: 7 outs
Vs top pair (not std for a preflop re-raiser)/2 pair (same): 10 outs
Vs 8-10: 3 outs to a chop

Guy call large bets pre, flop, and turn hits his flush on the river goes check check, other guy in the hand says are you serious and the guy who was chasing leans over to me and says why is he mad I paid the whole way so its not a suck out.

Ran into this one over the weekend... "The drunk guy (spewing tons of chips and continually rebuying) is offending me. Can I get a table change?"

Look... it's a casino, not a church. If you can't play with drunk guy, you just don't like money.

i loled