Degen Stories.... - Page 241 - Poker Beats Brags and Variance

If no degen ever won, why would any degen ever degen?

Loss is not the central element in degeneracy; rather, it is the force of will dedicated to the illusion of control and the faulty correlation between the sensation of that will and the way the ground quakes and the clouds part when a degenerate's greed is indulged with the occasional accidental victory.

Winning a tourney is not degen, not even close.

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11-05-2013 , 12:58 PM

#6002

absherrj

banned

Join Date: Feb 2011 Posts: 1,410

Not necessarily. If you use the rent money to play the tournament that's degen. Winning the tournament is simply baller.

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11-05-2013 , 01:05 PM

#6003

thabighurt35

**** you Monday

Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 11,588

Quote:

Originally Posted by Degenfish

wrong again, a degenerate gambler is one who seeks the thrill of the loss and lacks the control to leave when they are up.

You flame people itt for posting degen stories where they lose money that is significant to their life roll, and then post a rambling tldr story about you winning money. Seriously?

EABoD's, fix your name and post somewhere else.

if you need further definitions look here :

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Problem_gambling

or here:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...rate%20gambler

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11-05-2013 , 01:37 PM

#6004

Degenfish

adept

Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 1,164

Quote:

Originally Posted by theshocker7

I'm a pretty big dumbass

Quote:

Originally Posted by thabighurt35

I'm an even bigger dumbass

Fixed both your posts. The whooshing sound overhead was the point you both completely missed.

This is the degen stories thread, not the therapy thread. We need more stories like King Niche back in the day and Lotgrinder before he tried to turn this thread into his blog instead of attention whoring bull**** from a guy who's been told multiple times to just self-bar, go to GA and move the **** on with his life.

Also, using money to gamble when you're several thousand dollars in debt instead of, you know, paying off the debt is equally as degenerate as borrowing money to gamble. DUCY?

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11-05-2013 , 01:42 PM

#6005

POCKET ROCKETS OOO

banned

Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 1,422

@degenfish.

That story sucked.

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11-05-2013 , 02:05 PM

#6006

Degenfish

adept

Join Date: Jun 2011 Posts: 1,164

Quote:

Originally Posted by POCKET ROCKETS OOO

@degenfish.

That story sucked.

Jesus, you're still here?

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11-05-2013 , 02:09 PM

#6007

1-5onceIcourtfish

newbie

Join Date: Mar 2012 Posts: 26

Last week had no money to get to work due to gambling it all on pay day. Walked 4.5miles each way to work for 6 days straight. Was lucky it never rained once. This week lost all my wages again on payday so have to walk to and from work weds,thurs and friday and the weather forecast is heavy rain, wind and bitterly cold.
Variance- I lost 4lbs last week.

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11-05-2013 , 04:17 PM

#6008

POCKET ROCKETS OOO

banned

Join Date: Jul 2013 Posts: 1,422

Yes surrrrr alive and kicking.

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11-05-2013 , 04:27 PM

#6009

wiscopollock

journeyman

Join Date: Jan 2012 Posts: 206

This thread fell apart roughly 5 - 6 months ago and no offense Degenfish, even though your clearly right, it's hardly worth fighting the fight....Pocket Rockets has spoken and so it has been decreed.

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11-05-2013 , 04:52 PM

#6010

theshocker7

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 4,278

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1-5onceIcourtfish

This is degen!

My dad used to employ to lads who did the same thing, they'd get paid Friday and be skint by the evening as their was a ladbrokes next to the pub we used to go to when we finish at lunchtime.

It went on for years, the amount of nights out they missed was tragic.

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11-05-2013 , 05:16 PM

#6011

Nobel1

grinder

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 666

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1-5onceIcourtfish

At least you are posting in the right thread, some people would make a brag thread for loosing 4lbs out of it.

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11-05-2013 , 07:16 PM

#6012

CryMeARiver17

centurion

Join Date: Oct 2013 Posts: 151

Fk this ****ing beat, just spend 1hour+ on writing my story, only to logout and lose my whole ***** text, what is this $hit aaaaah.

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11-05-2013 , 07:23 PM

#6013

ZawaZawa

stranger

Join Date: Nov 2011 Posts: 11

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheGreenMagi

England: A place where you can smoke a fat joing in 6th form and get straight D's... the highest mark possible.

I think he means 'Distinction's rather than Ds

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11-06-2013 , 12:40 PM

#6014

SISTEBOSSEN

grinder

Join Date: May 2010 Posts: 616

Quote:

Originally Posted by CryMeARiver17

Fk this ****ing beat, just spend 1hour+ on writing my story, only to logout and lose my whole ***** text, what is this $hit aaaaah.

lol cry me a river, kid...

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11-06-2013 , 02:19 PM

#6015

Marcus5

centurion

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 122

Quote:

Originally Posted by boythinks

one time i got bad beated really bad and lost $400 playing 100nl on FTP...

i started tilting ..... then.. in a complete rage i bought several decks of playing cards and a hat from the FTP store

the FTP cards are really bad quality ... and i never wore the hat

hows that for degen story??

lol WHAT? lol

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11-06-2013 , 02:51 PM

#6016

Marcus5

centurion

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 122

Quote:

Originally Posted by King Niche

one time i was sitting in my house on my own i had just split up with my gf who was a crack head but she was nice.. the room was dark i was surrounded by bottles of piss half eaten sandwiches i even had a crust behind my ear i was quite sad because i was busto and heartbroken i thought maybe we would make it work and she would be my main squeese anyway she left me for a crack dealer..so at this point im feelin like ten dewey heart aching empty busto feeling and linger tilt from stacking off with a flush draw because some crotch monkey over bets the pot and i run into the swinging blade and throw up 2 clanging bricks and I just punch my ****in monitor almost put my fist through it and then i kicked my coffee table but not like a regular person no no no..i have to hit it as hard as I can with my ****ing shin!!!! wtff was i thinking im not van damme or some **** that hurt so bad i collapsed in agony and started crying i just laid there whimpering in agony sobbing and eventually the pain eased off but i had blood running all the way down my leg..i just laid there on the carpet for 2 hours staring into space i even knocked one out while laying in the recovery position i felt so lazy like a lazy slob and i smelt so rank like chinese food in a dumpster for days..i eventually get up im wearing stripey boxers and half of them is up my ass ive got my ass cheek showing but i dont care i sit at my pc and watch some 200/400 on betfair wishing i was in the game..i kept sitting at a table hoping i would have cash in my account i actually prayed to mary magdagascar..i check my emails and boooom titan poker have put free money in my damn account!!!!!!!!!!!!!! woooooooooooooo..it felt like a blessing. Its like 5 dollars..so I go straight to max but in 5c/10c or some BS where u get nit on nits and I run that **** up to 20 in no time, then I but in at 25/50 and I hit a big overset and and I make some decent bluffs I get my stack to 145..at this point im thinking ok just play this mother****ing cool dont be a degen waste of lung capacity but i say *** it i will take a shot at 2/4...

so I pick the easiest table luckily for me they are all easy and first hand I shove with the doyle brunson just for good luck everyone folds secnd hand i get AA..I shove I get 2 callers an Iwin and im oer 400 i say**** this and i goto 5/10 witha short stack what else am i suppose to do..i run this upto 3k pretty easily and step up to 10/20 and in 3 hours I have 13k..then it happened..I GET KING ****ING KING and some guy called han solo (TILTED) raises me to 30 dollars I re raise to 180 He raises to 550 I call planning to shove any flop flop comes AAA ..he says to me in chat I HAVE IT and bets the pot im like wtf ..thats areverse reversal bluff damn *** he must have it **** i cant fold i felt my heart speed up kind of like a panic attack how can i fold this my dad is in my ear saying DONT CALL he has the 4 of a kind im like no dad let me play my own damn hands why cant you go and play poker with otis redding always ****** interfering ..and i start arguing with him cant believe i have gone from 5 dollars to over a 20k pot in just hours..I call and he flips over QQ..I FIST PUMP LIKE IM OHN MACKENROE SHOUTING NOW WHAT NOW WHAT DAD HE DIDNT SAY **** TURN QUEEN RIVER QUEEENNNNNNNNNNN>>OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG I MWAS SO ****IN MAD I STARTED SPITTINGup BLOOD FOAMING UP ...PUNCHED MY SELF in teh side of the head AND STARTED SHOUTING AT MY DAD INSIDE MY HEAD IM LIKE **** OFF LEAVE ME ALONE GET OUT OF My HEAD.. OMGG IM BUSTO AGAIN I FEEL LIKE A WORM WHO HAS HAS BIN SHOVELLED WHEN THE GROUND IS COLD OR MABE STUCK HIS HEAD IN A TURD..I FELT LIKE SUCH A ****INg DEGEN I COULD HAVE PLAYED 5/10 with 13k so easily and made decent rake and maybe found me some new pussy easily when i tell em im back to being a pro...first i burnt my hand on the stove on purpose omggg i was so wasted i went out in the backyard stark naked i started climbing the trees and just trying to get back to nature and forget the damn poker..loking back id lost my damn mind that pot had eloctrocuted my noodle..it started to rain and i looked so pathetic i couldnt even get a crack whore to stay with me and I had a big hemmaroid and my white pastey body stood out under the grey sky i must have looked like a sagging bag of milk...

..all i wanted to do was grind for 18 hours a day and fester in my own filth and live the life of a poker pro grind on the mind till i die make my tomb a house of cards.. i wanted to give up so bad.. now i was busto and i couldnt see a break in the clouds or any hope the next day when i woke up i had to masturbate just so i could get out of bed i browsed 2+2 and went back to bed for 3 days..I didnt even get up to go peepee i just pissed the bed because i was busto and nothing else mattered..i kept reminded myself that atleast i nwasnt the fat sloth puppet in that movie seven where he gets locked in a bat cave and is made to eat spaghetti till his guts spill open..but this didnt make me feel any better..
whats urine and the smell of a cheesy ritz cracker ass crack when you lost a 26k pot? i didnt give a **** about pissing on myself by that point..i could of had a milllion dingelberries attatched to my ass i wouldnt have cared...i was so upset the lowest point for so long even lower than when i talked myself out of a guy giving me a BJ for $100 I just couldnt do it..i felt lower than when my mom force fed me flowers..I almost killed myself on day 2 when metallica came on the radio..i dont know how I ever made it out alive..i always swear to this day it was just the hope of being back in action someday..it lifted me out of the bottomless pit and gave me reason to live and breathe..never quit guys..not even when they are dragging your face through the ****..there is always someone worse off than you..like a guy with a glass eye with a fish in it....keep grind on the mind

COMEDY GOLD !!! LOL LOL LOL

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11-06-2013 , 05:35 PM

#6017

dgiharris

All Hail His Modness

Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 12,292

Quote:

Originally Posted by Degenfish

my head just exploded.

You sir, are king of the degens... Normal mortals just cannot understand the thoughts and mindset of us degens.

I bow to you sir.

All hail king degenfish...

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11-06-2013 , 06:26 PM

#6018

wombat4hire

in touch with humanity

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 6,940

Yea that post is classic KingNiche and one of the best on the site.

Dunno why everyone (sans dgi ofc) is giving Degenfish a hard time his was a true degen story.

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11-08-2013 , 05:03 AM

#6019

zapoy

stranger

Join Date: Nov 2013 Posts: 3

Yesterday i played in Casino. Very drunk. I dont remember second half of the night. But today I wake up with no money in pocket and black eye. Maybe i lost in Casino maybe i was robbed afterwards...

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11-08-2013 , 01:39 PM

#6020

RocketQueenQ

newbie

Join Date: Dec 2012 Posts: 39

Quote:

Originally Posted by zapoy

Yesterday i played in Casino. Very drunk. I dont remember second half of the night. But today I wake up with no money in pocket and black eye. Maybe i lost in Casino maybe i was robbed afterwards...

Maybe some dude punched you after you offered him a bj for 20 bucks.

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11-08-2013 , 01:44 PM

#6021

Tre-fi

journeyman

Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 285

maybe some dude **** slapped you after he accepted a bj for 20 bucks.

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11-09-2013 , 10:28 AM

#6022

Davino

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 7,552

Quote:

Originally Posted by zapoy

Yesterday i played in Casino. Very drunk. I dont remember second half of the night. But today I wake up with no money in pocket and black eye. Maybe i lost in Casino maybe i was robbed afterwards...

poor barsted