CA put on 500 for the first wicket and McCullum calls the game off because the pitch is dangerous.

Is this real life?

N
M

Lol again the kiwis being soft. Who the **** do they think they are? India?

Yes what an absolute mine field that caused us to have that 500 run opening stand

Have NZ even won a series in Australia?

As usual Dennis Denutto drops in with some typical ignorance

Google is your friend bro

Guptill bowled 11 overs, goes to show how serious this was taken

Zero ****s given till the real series starts

Just embarrassing how low Aussies can go when they feel they will lose

Oh well will make it that much sweeter when the series is won

I think they have only ever drawn a series. This was 10 years or so back.

Fair imo

Nice shot of the bowlers footmarks. What about the relevant bits?

He came on at 0/400

.

Well let me put it this way. That pitch looked as flat as anything in terms of bounce. So the only thing dangerous for the kiwis was the inconsistent bounce (and the thought that it would cause too much of a detrimental effect on their batting techniques for the 1st test) even though it wasn't going to get much past waist height.

Also that picture was about two or two metres down the pitch which is really negligible with batsmen batting well outside their creases these days.

Perhaps they were a bit scared of Stanlake too who has the potential to be a right arm version of Starc and we all know how the kiwis were backing away from Starc in the world cup final...

NZ don't have anyone in their line up capable of handling Johnson's pace, or even Starc's for that matter. McCallum is a great one day player and perhaps even a good test batsman in the right circumstances and against the right bowling line up, but he doesn't have the technique do to it against the top pace bowling imo (not many do in international cricket atm) #flattrackbully. We will clean sweep this serious in spite of an inexperienced/weak batting line up.

So Rod Marsh says we have an official youth first policy and then selects 30 year old military medium trundler Peter Siddle.

I have to be honest, it seems like the only requirement to be an Australian test selector is to have spent your career drinking too much, eating too much, punting too much or in the case of Rod Marsh (current chairman), Mark Waugh (current selector) and Merv Hughes (selector until recently) - all of the above.

Our cricketing set up has gone from the clear international benchmark to being invaded by these anachronistic bogans at almost all levels of importance. I understand nobody liked Geoff Buchannan but at least he brought some ideas into his role rather than the anti-intellectual mess we have atm. The fact that Darren Lehman is the national coach speaks for itself.

The problem is that his performance in the last test of the Ashes series has delivered him a position in the squad but it is all artificial and not really telling of his value to the Australian team at home because of the conditions over there in England and of course the lol England team's performance.

I hope this doesn't cost us the clean sweep.

Lol Denis and bundy

Its mindblowing how consistently wrong you both are

You either both have to be trolling constantly or are the most stereotypical aussie blowhards ever created

Williamson is world class, up there with Root, Kohli and Smith.

Thanks for that personal swipe and once again not actually addressing anything of substance.

Ali, Patel and Rashid surely one of the worst spin trios ever to grace the Test arena.

Quick comparison to Anderson and Broad this match, on a pitch that's supposed to be helpful to spin from the start.

		Overs		Maidens		Runs		Wkts		Econ		Ave
A & B		77.1		29		126		11		1.63		11.45
A, P & R		115.2		12		423		7		3.67		60.43

Seemed to be a succession of perfect long hops, immaculate wide full tosses and flawless leg stump half volleys, not once letting their concentration waver to drop it on a good length targeting off.

Although it's obviously not impossible for us to get 284 to win this, I seriously doubt we get there, especially with only one opener and Stokes not able to bat properly.

And lol, as I type, Ali gets pinged on the lid ducking and turning his back on a bouncer. He's just not good enough, it's almost a textbook example of how not to play the short ball. It's painful watching him open, and pathetic to continue with an experiment that's doomed to fail

And Ian Bell should probably retire immediately.

IIRC the last time he was actually dominant was in the 2013 Ashes when the convicts basically just came over here and then rolled over and died all summer.

Think he's probably only had two or three tons since then, one against Windies earlier this year, one last summer in that huge partnership with Ballance and maybe one more somewhere, idk.

Bring back KP

NZ vs Aus 1st test in Brisbane starting in 6 hrs

Really looking forward to this, great chance to knock off the big bro

Brisbane wicket has been described as a standard for them with lateral movement on day 1 quckening up for days 2 and 3 then set to play some tricks on the last days

Bundy and Denis will be glad to see Siddle is out for Hazlewood, really good bowling line up, we need to take advantage of their inexperienced batting

Lets go boys!!!

Aus win the toss (of course) and choose to bat ****

Never mind good opportunity for Tim and Trent to get into the inexperienced guys

Brisbane is probably the best deck in Australia in the sense that losing the toss is not that big of a disadvantage. Need to take 3-4 wickets in before lunch minimum though.

Joe Zzzzzzzzzzzzurns