Yeah.. I'm a bit jealous right now actually. Not a lot, mind you, but whatever he is doing sounds a whole lot better than what I'm doing.

I'm sure its a short-term temporary trip/visit type thing but still. Damn.

You're afraid to tell us what you do aren't you? Can't have us dissecting your actual value provided to society. I understand, gotta safeguard that plutocracy.

Don't you have kids? They definitely suck away some money making abilities but kids have some inherited value as well.

Right, and that's a completely predictable response and why people are so hesitant to talk about money in the first place. Explaining why you think you're not rich and why you think you are both get the haters furious.

It doesn't really bother me, like I've said from the start, everyone is certainly free to hold whatever bizarre personal subjective definition of rich they want.

That's my side, though. The "it's not important" side is not the one you're on.

Your side is that there are "reasonable definitions" and, by implication, "unreasonable" ones.

It's like someone strenuously arguing that a 6'8" man shouldn't be described as tall because he'd be terribly undersized to play center in the NBA. Like, sure, OK, I guess by that standard you're not wrong, per se. People certainly called Dennis Rodman undersized for his whole career.

But it'd be weird if you met Dennis Rodman, asked him to get something off the top shelf because he was tall, and he refused and acted all hurt because Yao Ming is 7 inches taller than him.

"You short people don't know what it's like to battle for rebounds with guys 4-5 inches taller than me every game! If you aren't at least 6'5" you probably shouldn't even talk about the definition of tall"

95%+ of my job is math and writing code. About as boring, for a lot of people atleast, as it gets. We're trying a new form of beta implementation now, my group comes up with the math and sandboxes a lot of the code but there are other groups that implement it and take ownership of it going forward. Somebody in upper management thinks this works better if the original math developers aren't around, as it forces software to actually learn and not just ask us everytime they have a problem. So they basically have to pay me over the summer and they don't want me in the building so they sent me to check on really minor things that they own thats not really a priority just because there isn't anything else for me to do. I'm not sure if anybody is even going to bother to read the reports I'm creating tbh.

It's really not that hard. Just don't complain about any aspect of something you have better than 95+% of the Americans and 99%+ of the world. Ever. This includes whining about how now one appreciates your perspective on said thing.

Seriously, it shouldn't not that hard to not come off like this:



Yet you can't seem to help yourself.

Yes, I have a beautiful daughter. She's absolutely adorable and really makes me happy in ways I've never felt before. That being said, she's incredibly expensive. Not counting food/diapers/clothes (because relatively that stuff isn't actually expensive), just the child care costs us 1,000 a month and we don't use a ton of it. Educational costs will be really ugly in a few years, something I'm not looking forward to.

In all honesty, I'm hesitant to have another child because of it. I don't mean to start up another bitch fest, but wtf. It really is kinda stressful, even though I know I'm pretty lucky to be in the situation I'm in, relative to everyone else.

She is great though and as corny as this sounds being a father is really much more fulfilling than I'd have ever dreamed.

This made me burst out laughing.

Suzzer,

I wasn't complaining, just stating a fact wrt why people are hesitant to talk about money.

Oh you must do some sort of technical stuff for an investment bank or something, eh? Or something specialized? I didn't think regular programmers make huge money. I've heard of some consultants for specialized/rare platforms make ridiculous money though, in the 500 dollar an hour range.

Yes there is a good reason for that - as you have demonstrated. No one wants to hear the money problems of someone who makes much more money than them. It's like showing Man vs. Food to a bunch of hungry people in Africa.

I have a ten month old now and yes, daycare costs, not including the hassle of finding or keeping a reliable person or location is the hardest part. Having a child really puts things into perspective about what is worth worrying about and what is not. Simple things don't razzle me anymore. Its a sense inner peace.

One thing I've noticed is that you'll never wake up or go to bed thinking, "where is my life headed or what is my purpose?"

You also never sleep in on the weekends.

It definitely sucks to be able to afford only one jet.

And I have found another way of keeping the nagging "what is my life's purpose" thoughts at bay.

Trust your instincts, padawan.

I had a kid in my life from age 7 on. She's in college now. I got to do all the fun stuff but missed all the 3-yr-old meltdowns and baby bodily fluids. I feel like I got a pretty good deal.

I agree. Fatherhood is great (as long as you are in a good/stable part of your life), but in terms of finances it can be stressful. Kids just cost you a lot, and in ways that aren't obvious. A few months after she was born my wife said "It would be a lot easier if I had an SUV". So, we traded in her car for an SUV. The furniture for the baby cost a little bit, I remember the crib was pretty expensive, and we had to buy the basinet and all the other crap. Diapers were like 50 bucks a week or something, food was almost nothing (breastfed), clothes were very reasonable (I actually thought they were cheap).

But little things like a bigger hotel room when travelling, an extra airline ticket, unfamiliar baby sitter, etc. Lately my wife has been talking about buying a bigger home because we "need more room" and are outgrowing where we live now.

Children cost a lot of money. Beware. Pull out.

Bah. There are usually certain triggers that cause the married/family thing to happen. #1 is your friends all start getting married. That can be held off for a while because you can just keep telling yourself 'whatever, I'm not ready yet' and for quite a while that works. #2 is you start losing hair or physically don't look good as you used to. That starts bringing on this weird feeling of 'well, I better get married relatively soon before I look like Tom who's fat and bald and jerks off to porn all day' and you become more open to marriage and then just pull the trigger.

These things usually happen around 32 years old. Every year after 32 the pressure increases dramatically.

I'm working out the full theory, but that's pretty accurate from what I've observed.

This might be the dumbest thing I've ever read on this site.

Completely agree.

Though I thought a possible exception could be made when posting on an anonymous internet forum in a thread specifically dedicated to defining terms like "upper middle class" and "rich".

I was under the impression that since the above conditions were satisfied, I could discuss the topic honestly and openly, without it being considered in poor taste. I see now that I was mistaken.

My apologies.

So Brocktoon, the deal you wanted was where you could disagree with other people, but they couldn't disagree with you?

You work in finance, right?

You're a silly goose.

Nah, disagreeing and discussing what we disagree about is fine. Ideally that's how you learn things.

Telling people to STFU about whether or not $X qualifies as a certain lifestyle because $X > most people make, in a thread that is about precisely that issue, seems silly to me.

I do agree that it is pointless to argue about though. I'll find something better to do.

Not sure if i am allowed to post this here, but I recently developed a method for putting your pants on two legs at a time. Willing to share for a price, PM me for more info.