@Kristy: I have never attended a wedding where my gift cost less than my attendance. That is purely coincidental though. It's not a business transaction where my gift is a reimbursement for food and beverages.

Who the **** are you talking to?

I think you're right that there is a number out there, but I'm not sure.

I don't wear jewelry, so we talked about it beforehand and skipped the splashy engagement ring. My wedding band is plain, simple, white gold. I think we spent a few hundred?

It would almost entirely be based off my disposable income at the time and my closeness to the bride/groom. I would never consider the niceness of the venue.

This is where I'm at.

An old person giving $25 because they don't have a lot and/or don't realize what things cost these days isn't stingy and is totally acceptable to me.

A rich relative giving $25 probably is stingy.

And it has little to do with the cost of the wedding.

I'm really not understanding how you get "business transaction" out of

I want them to be completely free of the debt and stress of their perfect day, and on their way to a blissfully happy life together.

Then they could have had a wedding the could afford. Simple solution.

the other day at the grocery store I self checked out in multiple separate purchases in order to get more receipts because on the back there is sometimes a $3 coupon to a place i eat at twice a week.

Yes, that is stingy.

Couple things, we asked more than my mom, a few people brought salads etc... my wife made cupcakes in lieu of a real cake. But yeah it was all family, no friends, and we didn't invite any out of town family.

I wore jeans a polo, my wife wore a white sun dress. I changed to shorts almost immediately after the ceremony. No wedding party at all.

We did very specifically tell people not to bring gifts or money, we just asked that they come enjoy a nice family BBQ while we exchanged vows.

We live in Ontario now. Socials aren't only a Manitoba thing, they have 'Jack and Jills' here, and basically do the same thing.

I don't personally have any issues with wedding socials at all, we just knew we weren't having a big wedding and it wasn't going to cost much. Also, planning socials is a lock of work, ain't nobody got time for that.

Where I am from a cash gift at a wedding is the height of tackiness and a gift card is only slightly less so.

Customs and practices vary all over the map.

But lol @ thinking about trying to cover your nut when attending a wedding.

I'm so glad I don't live somewhere where cash is considered the height of tackiness.

Me too!

I'm from Southern Ontario originally, and I've always thought 'Stag and Does', and all the games, were great!


Double this! Although they're definitely forboden at Christmas and birthdays.

I live in southern Ontario, and I agree they are, or at least the ones I've been to were.

I don't have any issue with a wedding social, I'm likely going out drinking anyways, even better that my friends who are getting married are going to benefit from it.

And all this time the young newlyweds were hoping that I'd picked out nice crocheted doilies for them instead of sending them a big check.

I think my preferred order of gifts was:

Actual thoughtful gift from close friends/family
Cash
Gift from registry
Random gift not in registry but with no particular thought behind it.


Funny that I'm also from Southern Ontario. I think stag and does are fine when the couple doesn't set out to bleed their friends dry with a bunch of stupid money making 'games'.

Yeah, socials in Manitoba didn't really have the games you guys have here.

Most couple sought out prize donations from various places and held a silent auction.

a while back, we were getting starbucks refreshers from target at whatever price they were. two bucks each maybe?

Eventually, we started getting coupons with our receipts for like a buck off if you buy three, so 33 cents a can in savings.

We went on a huge string of getting these coupons and buying more, because we were going to buy them anyway. But then one day, the coupons stopped printing. Didn't see a single one forever.

Eventually stopped buying the drinks. Partially because I didn't want to pay full price after getting accustomed to always having them on discount. (Think we started buying them because they were on special and we wanted to try them out. Strawberry lemonade one is GOAT)

Anyone care to explain socials and stag and does?

Social =

1. Rent a hall
2. Invite pretty much everyone you know and charge $10-$20 a ticket.
2. Bring in your own alcohol and charge for it
4. Go around to local businesses and beg for prizes to be raffled off.

I am probably more bitter about them than I should be, but working in the restaurant industry we would get hundreds of requests per month for donations during wedding season, mostly from people we had never seen before.

^ What exactly about this is "social"? Sounds like running a business enterprise at the cost of your friends, kind of like Tupperware, other multi-level marketing businesses.

It pretty much is

They do Jack and Jills in New England (which are similar) but I've never heard of anyone asking local businesses for donations nor bringing in their own alcohol and charging for it.

Im guessing you are not married