Going for a girl who has a child might be a good option. They will have much lower standards as vast majority of guys will not want a long term reletionship with them. I have seen some bery below average guys marry some above average girls as they had a kid.

hmmm

well, it probably wouldn't be so bad if I'm not the actual father

Don't think I'd be a very good "provider", though.

You shouldn't even be thinking about this ****. You should me messaging any girl you come across that you think would go out with you and go on any date that presents itself simply to gain experience. You have said you have absolutely zero life experience with girls, so you have a lot of catching up to do. Might as well work out all of the mistakes etc... with whatever girl comes your way.

Not sure if paranoid or not...

Girl opens me on okc giving me compliments, we flirt and i arrange next week to meet.
Not heard from girl i am seeing since asking okc girl out.
Not heard back from okc girl in same period, she didnt confirm my time and place.

2 days now for both... If this is a set up test i give up on online

Not sure if paranoid or not...

Girl opens me on okc giving me compliments, we flirt and i arrange next week to meet.
Not heard from girl i am seeing since asking okc girl out.
Not heard back from okc girl in same period, she didnt confirm my time and place.

2 days now for both... If this is a set up test i give up on online

can't just think about your holdings, have to think about what villain is holding too. sounds like she was thinking one level above you. it happens.

Ha, I've had that happen to me but like three days later the girl I had already hung out with text me to make plans.

But I'm sure there are girls who do that to guys. Probably doing the guy a favor at that point though as they're clearly nuts.

Oh. OK, thanks. This **** is already confusing, and I haven't even really done anything yet.

I think I should take any girl that wants to meet me to get drinks. I'm sure I'd be ridiculously nervous on the first date, and it'd be good to loosen myself up. Thoughts?

Yep just line up as many dates as possible. The uglier the better at first so you get some experience for ones you actually like. Plus the more dates you go on the quicker you'll realize there isn't anything to be so nervous about. You either hit if off or you don't. No reason to fret over it so much.

Just go out with girls you find attractive. The exact hot ones you match with wont wait around for ever. At all times do what you want and have zero expectations for anything. Also do not under any circumstances, think about anything negative about yourself while on the date.

wu i think your flake texts were fine. the act itself is generally alpha so you can afford to go kinda beta with the actual wording, otherwise she might think you are just completely uninterested.

Flaking is alpha?

wrong

Anything is that gets the point across, that she doesn't occupy a particularly large part of your life.

Thought the follow up fake text was fine.

I only used that word because wu specifically mentioned taking a "beta" line in his post but yes flaking is generally alpha.

a huge portion of this thread has been devoted to "how to deal with flakes" because it's the girl that flakes ~90% of the time. flipping that script and flaking on a girl (who is likely not used to getting flaked on) is usually going to come off as alpha.

Just clarifying ahead of time: Flaking is when you are either ditching a girl for better plans or just playing mind games with her and cancelling for no reason. Having legit life stuff happen isn't flaking, at least in my opinion. Granted they may view it as flaking but there's nothing you can do about that.

So if it's one of the two above examples then when you flake you are basically saying "I have options to do other **** that's cooler than you." While some call this "alpha" all it's really doing is creating an image of yourself as having more value than her.

Or, as the legendary George Costanza so eloquently put it, you now have hand.

Upper Hand Costanza

Edit to Add: I think this is bad behavior for a man. Just because women do crap to you doesn't mean you should do it to them. I can see it being used against brats/sloots to break them but that's too much work for me.

I agree that if something "better" or really important it looks good because you won't rearrange your life for a girl

But flaking to to be alpha seems silly but I guess that wasn't the case here.

i dont even think flaking is very alpha?

isnt being alpha being decisive and doing what you said you'd do? not changing your mind every other day? at least to me, that's what you come off as when you flake.

i think straight up rejecting plans and then picking another day and another venue from what she suggested is so much more alpha than agreeing to meet and then not meeting. even playing the whole take forever to text back or just straight up dont answer her texts is much much better in terms of your alphaness compared to flaking.

I wasn't advocating flaking just to flake, wu obv had something better come up.
Flaking is just an even more extreme/powerful version of those other tactics you listed. The same thoughts going through her mind when you take a while to text back are amplified 10x when you cancel plans with her.

I had a girl go dark tonight. iI was a day of tinder-planned rendezvous, and I had a strong feeling I was gonna be laying some pipe. C'est la vie

I just shot her a "ghey" but it wasn't even alpha at all cuz I had already sent two texts trying to confirm, so the "ghey" was the third text in a row from me.

Guys, gay ****ing works. Meet up impending, tr tomorrow

Sounds like a classy lady.

Gay worked but the date was an hour long with a peck