It's so easy in these types of threads to tell who is either 20 years old and has it all figured out, or who is 30 years old and still hasn't managed to figure out anything.

a manager was with a subordinate at my friend's former company with the same rules as OP's, and when the company found out, the choice was either the superior gets demoted or the subordinate gets transferred out of the region.

OP,

Your employee handbook is meaningless.

Contacting HR is a waste of time. HR does not exist to help employees, HR exists to protect the company from its employees.

Pouring gas and watching it burn will only hurt you. Especially since you said it's a small niche industry.

Do you have influence with anyone in power that can help you?

Look for a new job. Can you transfer to another of the 8 offices and stay within the company at the same level you are at instead of starting completely over?

Regarding the promotion - don't ask for confirmation, assume it is a done deal, and leave an email trail to that effect. Your emails should be talking about your plan to transition your existing responsibilities, and your plan for doing whatever it is the new position entails. Taking a presumptive approach gives you a lot more leverage if they don't respond than taking a questioning approach does. The questioning approach allows them to come back with a "it was never a done deal", the presumptive approach puts them on the defensive and having to explain why they never corrected you. You've probably already ****ed this up, but it doesn't hurt to try. This can matter if you do end up taking legal action.

Your only other real option is to do something like nullspace/Cuban B suggest. Go buy a $20 mini cam with wifi, set it up in a ceiling corner of the supply room, and when you get the evidence you need, pursue as you wish. Keep in mind that approaching her husband may be a waste of time, for all you know he's completely OK with her banging co-workers. Would certainly provide you with some significant leverage if they replace you with him down the line.

Probably best to just try to transfer to a different office or get another job if you don't think you can get rid of OM.

If you were to follow this route, considering sending evidence not just to OM's husband, but to any living parents or siblings of both. Also, gossipy co-workers. Neighbors.

lol, her husband is prob whipped and would start jacking off to any footage you send him, and guaranteed her siblings already know of her whorish tendencies.

If her kids were a few years older, I would consider advocating sending them some evidence.

Become Facebook friends and share. Send out a copy with the local church bulletin. Send out screeners to the entire employee base.

I will reiterate again to ignore country road as he is clearly ******ed.

Simplest advice is start looking for another job. It's not a healthy long term work environment.

But don't quit your current job until you find a new job (unless of course it is causing you severe problems)

And yes sex between coworkers happen all the time and is normal. however sex between manager and subordinate and ESP married individuals is completely unhealthy for everyone in the office.

Good luck!

church bulletin ladies and gentleman, church bulletin. THAT'L SHOW EM. well, except for the fact that the 4 people that still go to church don't even read that ****.

Given her description of "goodie two shoes family-oriented person", with young kids, that the OP had to hear from multiple sources to believe, i doubt the husband knowing is at all likely. I'd say 20-1 against having any idea.

OP, try to find out if the bf is bi? There might be some leverage there.

This is overly cynical and terrible advice in a lot of companies.

OP, How strict is the company culture wrt to cutting corners or playing favorites?

knives,

A company that size, if you have any evidence of this promised promotion, and the following facts:
-no paper trail of reprimands/underperformance etc
-this chick is banging dudes and hooking them up
-you're a gay dude

You should hope not to get that promotion, then sue and cash in some ridiculous hostile workplace settlement.

He's only received the promotion+raise verbally. Going to be hard to get that evidence when they've been dodging him all along. If he can't get that evidence then he can't go down that route.

Hanster,

He can def go down that route with very little concrete evidence and have a very high chance at collecting a substantial settlement.

Have you considered talking to a lawyer anyway. If I were in your situation, I'd want to make sure I'd covered all my bases and collected and documented everything I could ever need. Even if I wasn't planning to take legal action, I'd want to procede as if I were, just in case things get worse, so my options were open and I did regret not being better prepared to pursue things in some official manner if it came to that.

employment lawyer, if youre passed for promotion you could hit a small jackpot

this this this

Let's say he doesn't get the promotion, would it be admissible in court to record a conversation in person where you confront them separately over the verbal promotion?

1.) You MUST have proof to have any legal leverage about the affair. Without that, it is like it never happened.
I would either plant the cam, get phone records or whatever to get this proof.

2.) Do not make them aware you about it. Wait until after Jan 1st and see what happens.

If you get the proof and dont get the promotion, go to an attorney and ask them what to do. A free first time consultation with an attorney is going to be good, so they can teach you how to play your hand. If you have concrete proof of the affair get ready to ship one really big tourney; however you will have to walk away from the table afterwards.

these things never get to court, like ever, my understanding is you can record conversations in the workplace to use as proof of discrimination or retaliation, I am not a lawyer btw, nor an expert.

My understand is this is legal in some states and illegal in others. In Illinois all parties being recorded need to consent (source) (I'm not a lawyer either). The law on recording video seems less clear, it's legal to record just video in public places but not "a restroom, tanning bed, or tanning salon, locker room, changing room or hotel bedroom." Not sure where a storage room falls.

In any case seems like a bad plan to confront them even if you could record it as they are unlikely to admit any wrongdoing and it would limit your options.

Interesting day. It's amazing how obvious something becomes once you actually know it's taking place. The two disappeared today around the middle of the day for over an hour. Around the same time I had to open up the storage area and I half expected to find them, but nothing. Poked around some of the smaller rooms and closet areas while the shipment was being unloaded. There's bad lighting, not a real good place to put a camera, and the light flickers for about 30 seconds before turning on.

I'm thinking this might be happening on another floor, or in a stairwell. I saw the guy come down a stairwell on the ground level on the opposite side our office is on. No real reason I could think of for him to be there (I've used it once, for a fire drill). Asked him where he was coming from and he said you're mom's house. Touche.

Also he walked by me as he was leaving the office through my department, left, then came back 5 seconds later with flowers. I didn't ask him, but he said, "there was a guy out there delivering this, it's for OM, I think it's her birthday", and he delivered them to her.

Planning on continuing to observe patterns throughout the week.

Audio is illegal in Illinois without consent, not sure about video. Agree with not confronting them.

I guess my question is, does it have to be a promotion. If they say they aren't creating the position after all, but discovery would find that his pay increases have been substantially more, is that still actionable?

How?

You were speaking of HR. I agree with you in general, but in my situation I don't trust anyone in our HR department. My boss of 3 years sexually harassed multiple employees and nothing was done about it even though it was reported. They eventually got rid of him, but only after he told them he didn't share their vision of the future (he was old and didn't give a **** towards the end).

Guess he should probably go with the emailing them line, maybe email them individually? with his work towards planning and goals for being ready for the previous planned promotion.

This may be enough to get the proof that it was previously offered; if they apologize for the delay, or the position no longer being created at this time. That would be pretty ideal.

It seems like they are banging all over the office, probably get off on finding different spots, this shouldn't be too hard.