last post has to be a level after some people got suspicious it was going too smooth.

no way he doesnt just make a drink at home and ask if she wants one which works 4000x better, especially if he was able to supposed hold a 90 min conversation

Next time just hire a fat chick. Then she'll assume sucking **** is part of the gig. You will spend a little more on food though.

I have been to a Starbucks that served beer.

Lol awesome tr. Makes me so happy to see op fail

+1

FYP

Europe?

Yep, it's not standard but you do get them. The one I went to was in an airport but I wouldn't especially be surprised to see one on the high street that serves beer. Beer in McDonalds/Burger King, for example, is pretty standard around Europe too.

No I was not serious it was supposed to be a passive way of inviting her out for drinks which I was having a problem working up the balls to do. 'Lets find a starbucks that serves beer' when we both know no Starbucks serves beer was meant to be received as 'lets go to a bar' - which she didn't get and I guess nobody ITT got either, so epicfail.jpg

Starbucks line is one of the most ******ed things I've ever read.

This thread is so satisfying, regardless of if it's real or not. Creepy, unlikeable protagonist fails horribly at everything and embarasses himself.

Although everything in the story reminds me of a guy I used to live with that had the same awkward manner of trying to hint things, so it's not that difficult to believe that it's true.

We get it is just really really ******ed.

i think i'm just going to sit her down and lay it all out there for her explicitly and see what she says.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

She will say no. She already knows you're interested and her actions have made it clear that it's no. Explicitly asking her anything isn't going to help anything.

This should end well.

So clueless....please do that and report back from your jail cell.

Now I feel like I've been leveled.

The Starbucks thing doesn't matter. Asking this girl out for drinks is effectively asking her out on a date, and doing that made it clear to her that this whole pa thing is a creepy ploy to get a girl. If you were ever going to hook up with this chick it would've been at some random time when you're just hanging around the house.

I think you should go back to asking her about her friends. Assistants are better kept as pimps instead of whores, yo.

You guys are looking at this like for me to get what I want its necessary to deceive her or outplay her or something. She should be pretty aware of the fact by now that I'm interested in her and that I'm not the smoothest dude in the world. Regardless of what you guys learned on MTV that isn't always a turnoff to a girl and certainly isn't always a deal breaker. Maybe in a club with some girl who is looking for something not far from what you are looking for - but not in a situation where you actually get to know each other first and have more to offer her than how smooth you can deliver lines.

I really think this has a good shot of working in my favor. I think it's 50/50 that she'll either say something like 'I'm not the kind of girl to just sleep with random guys' (or otherwise implying its possible but we aren't having casual sex) or give me a really polite soft landing that allows us to maintain our working relationship.

At this point I like that a whole lot better than not knowing and continuing to try to find out either consciously or unconsciously.

In the words of the great Neverheeb,

'Whip it out and see what happens'

that sounds like something a creepy, unlikeable protagonist might say.

Start looking for a new PA m8 cause things are going to be pretty awkward around your house for awhile. This could later blow up in your face if you somehow get a different girl (lol @ this ) and she sees your PA before you get back to your room. If she and the PA meet before this your kind of fk'd. The PA is going to deter this girl through "hints" rather quickly. BTW this is the most amazing level thread ever if your playing us

I'm with ya op...**** her brains out.

I just think your dumb for basically buying a girlfriend that is not only going to end up nagging you at some point...but then she's going to ask for a raise.

Going to fire your **** buddy...or cave?