now that i think about it, what are the chances that OP has exaggerated everything OP's GF has done because OP is a huge jealous douchebag?

Hard to argue with this. Only thing left to do is run a MASH and see if she's really the one.

My OP is filled with simple facts and very few theories, so i don't see how i could have exaggerated everything. Then again, I did write about all the bad stuff and didn't mention the good.

Besides this Bob dude and a few of her close friends, her friend base has been cut down quite a bit since dating me. I remember the first night i met her she had like 20 people show up to her party. Now, she gets like 5-7 people to stop by. Basically, we spend a ton of time together and she loves talking to me on the phone. She used to like to talk for a good hour and a half everyday. We are both working full-time now, so we talk less, but still a decent amount.

She has introduced me to all of her friends too. It's not like she pushes me away from them because she doesn't think much of me. I know all her friends, met her immediate family many times, her cousins, grandma, god cousin, etc.

I bet I could have told the same story and worded it in a way that at least half of the people reading would take her side.

But you didn't because you think she's a lying, cheating whore and you wanted our validation so that you wouldn't feel bad for being pissed off at her.

Also, there is huge difference between biding your time and ****ing other chicks ... and saying, I'm not in any real hurry, I don't get out much. You do realize this? In the first you are expanding your options, in your theory you are just continuing to be tied to a girl that given what you have shown us treats you badly and is probably cheating on you. DUCY? Please?

That's an excellent reason to remain in an unhealthy relationship.

This means that none of her friends like you.

Your friends don't like you either.

I don't know what level we are on today and you probably have me on ignore....but....

Everyone has their good side and bad side. Who cares if she's a ho. Why not be a ho to the ho, anyway. You're in college, right? Hump her ****ing roommate or your classmates and sorority sisters etc. Christ. Have fun while you can before you settle down. None of this serious bull****.

Get out a little bit.

Edit: replace classmates w/ co-workers or something.

Ok, I think I was really off in my earlier post. After reading your subsequent posts in this thread, its pretty clear you two are perfect for each other, and I wanna see this work. I've outlined some steps that will ensure you two have a happy and wonderful life, so I hope your dont hold my earlier statements against me and not follow my advice now

1. Continue boring the **** out of all your friends and acquaintances with continued updates of "does she, or doesnt she love me?" Make sure and use all the really insightful evidence youve gathered about wetness and make sure and recount each conversation in exact and perfect detail. "Lastime she stayed the night at my place she didnt brush her teeth, and come to think of it she tasted like toothpaste when I kissed her when she first arrived, usually she brushes her teeth before she goes to bed" Important things like that. That way you can get honest feedback on whether or not she might have sucked dick before she got there that night.

2. Break up, and make up. Seriously, its a wonderful cycle. You dont appreciate what you have until its gone, and dont sweat it anyway, the times apart will only last about a week anyway, a month tops. Just make sure and be completely faithful to her during your time apart, and try your hardest not to ask if she was. Eventually you will, and she will admit things that upset you, but just remember, you were broken up, so really she was free to do whatever. The important thing is that shes with you now, thats all that really matters.

3. Stop using condoms (lol, I know thats funny right, cuz you never actually have), its important that you both know you can trust each other with your lives, and theres really no better way to do that then have unprotected sex as much as possible. Plus, sex with a condom sucks anyway, and Im sure she remembers to take her pill everyday.

4. Get engaged. Now that shes not in school anymore (she dropped out after the depression from her second abortion, shes never told you about any of that, you just think shes taking time to figure out what she wants to do with life) shes got way to much free time, and her constant partying and being gone all night are worrysome. It feels like shes slipping away from you, so its important to tighten your grasp. Eternal commitment is the best way. Plus you two were made for each other, after all youve been through and you are still together, thats true love if Ive ever seen it.

5. Get married. You've been engaged for 2 and a half years now, and you havent broken up in at least 6 months, its time for the happiest day of your life. Have the ceremony in her moms back yard, or at the park, and dont get upset if she invites an old boyfriend or two. Their just friends, and its important that your friends share in this wonderful experience

6. Start having kids, and LOTS of them. You get a sweet tax break and plus there will always be someone up to get you a beer when you are thirsty or to take your frustrations out on after a hard day of work.

7. Continue to bore the **** out of all your friends and acquaintances with continued updates of "is she, or isnt she cheating in me?" Make sure and always mention how she didnt want to have sex on your wedding night cuz she was too hungover still from the night before out celebrating her lastnight of freedom with her friends (and no its not weird bob was at the bachelorette party), and how she constantly has headaches. And how she doesnt get as wet as she used to, but thats normal after a few kids tho right??

8. Bore the **** out of your friends and acquaintances by constantly talking about your divorce, and asking them if theyve seen or heard what shes up to. Make sure and have them recite every single detail about their conversations with her, you dont want to miss any sign that she might want to take you back

9. Move on. You dont need that cheating whore anyway, and the bars are FULL or horny chicks just looking for a man now that they are divorced too. Plus youve got that sweet new (used) mustang, and the chicks love a sports car.

10. Neglect your children. Shes got custody of them anyway, let her deal with them. They dont need a father figure, or to learn how to cope with the situations life throws at them. If dads constantly gave their daughters hugs there wouldnt be strippers or porn stars, and then how would anyone ever jerk off? And you are bitter and jaded towards women anyway (****ing whores) so youd prolly just be doing a disservice to your son by explaining to him how to treat a woman, im sure hell figure it out anyway, hell thats what college is for right? To meet chicks and figure life out

11. Get remarried. Yeah I know I said I wanted to see you and the current woman work out, but sometimes thats just not what life has in store for you. Plus this new woman is really wonderful, shes been married twice so the both of you have plenty of experience at relationships and marriage, so im sure this one will work out, and shes only 42 so you two can still have a child that her other 3 children (2 from the first husband, 1 from the second) can resent because you both spoil. And im sure your 4 kids from your first wife will be happy for you and your new life, and they've got a new step dad anyway so you dont have to worry that you only see them once or twice a year, im sure hes treating them well.

12. Die content knowing that you lived a life full of spiritual fulfillment and accomplishment and that you made the world and those around you better.

Pertty sure he meant ClassicBob. Or maybe it was SuperUberBob. Or... might have been PokerBob. Actually, I think it was PokerBobo... no wait...

Alobar, that was amazing

Stupid

Trusting

Emotional

Pussy-whipped

Helpless

Adolescent

Naive

Alobar for adviceforummod

one day i shall write as well as alobar and that is the day that stephan will rediscover his testicles

man this thread has turned out to be greater than I thought

OP you should seek professional help.
luckily,I have found a solution to your problem!!!

Alobar,

Wow. Some of the best stuff I've ever seen on OOT. Lets just hope that this thread doesn't trainwreck and then it gets locked away for ever.

Alobar,

I don't post in OOT much, but that post was awesome. Do you write -- like, outside of OOT/webforums?


also, whether this thread is a brilliant kkf prank or a legitimate situation, its pretty awesome.

nope, you guys are the only ones blessed enough to witness my run on sentences, poor grammar, and terrible spelling

Damn, I saw Alobar made another post and I opened this thread just to read some additional sick burns on OP.

Alobar, please don't map people's lives out before it actually happens. It upsets people since it's not a surprise anymore.

I know it's advice, but it seems more like a prediction.

*bump*

so can we get an update on you 2 lovebirds???

she is for sure wanting to bang him so gtfo while you still can

I can't find the picture but reading through this thread reminded me of the the hysterical passenger scene in Airplane, where everybody is lined up to beat the **** out of, and knock some sense into, the passenger.

"What's the Matter with you OP? Get A Hold of Yourself for Christs SAKE!"