No advice here. But if Catch22 actually does what he says he's gonna do, that is badass.

Eddie Haskell ITT:

OP, cut out all the facebook/revenge stuff, just break up with her, tell the wife. call it a day. You'll become the ******* in the eyes of everyone you know, not her, if you do the facebook stuff.

agreed, and please film her reaction and post that!

i love bison and alobar. both ****in' smart.

on this one, i go with bison.

wise man.

Also, if your girlfriend is cheating on you by routinely banging some dude in the back of his car, you are most likely doing something wrong.

Normal cheating makes sense, but banging in cars is out of necessity.

Agree with Alobar about ending it amicably. Tell her its you and that you've fallen out of love with her. This will hurt her far more than any of this petty drama, which, incidentally, will probably justify her callous behaviour and cheating because she'll be able to say 'this is why I am cheating on you!' Women love feeling in control, so leaving her because you've fallen out of love with her is optimal.

On the other hand, the flowers idea is superb. To complete the effect, send flowers to the other guy's wife on the same day and watch their world of infidelity come crumbling down.

Don't be vindictive, that facebook/email nonsense makes you look crazy. Doing stuff in public (posting pictures, changing her status update to let people know) makes you look self-pitying and pathetic. You want her to look like the vindictive, pathetic one to your mutual friends, not you. If you can get her out of the apartment for example, you are well within your rights to do that and it is reasonable, burning all her stuff or whatever is gonna make you look childish and as bad as her.

As for telling the wife I would do it, not to **** with the guy but because this woman's husband is ****ing another woman, possibly more and the wife deserves to know... Saying OP is contributing to breaking apart the family is bull**** imo, it is entirely on the husband. Better the devil you know.

Do not do the revenge stuff, especially regarding messing with her accounts. And keep the people who know minimal - it just reflects badly on you.

Break up with her concisely and avoid getting in one-liners that you think are zingers.

Make sure you have the apartment thing worked out. The lease could potentially be a big awkward problem but I don't know what your specific situation is.

If you tell the wife make sure it's just a transfer of information and then get out of their situation completely. If you don't have the mindset to do this without involving yourself in the drama then just don't do it. Personally, I would definitely tell the wife and I don't understand why so many have the whole 'no-snitching' mentality.

Unless the guy was an ass hole? Is there really any doubt? He's married with a kid and is nailing some other chick in the back seat of his car.

Completely backwards advice. I recommend you hit her with as many zingers as possible, prepared ahead of time if possible. That way they're guaranteed to sound natural and un-forced. May I suggest "You're not my girlfriend you're my girl-enemy!"

honestly, u should just say "f u ho," i'm out. then smash a buncha her stuff around, then peace out.

i swear to you this is the best option. she feels terrible, you're not getting into something you don't want to get into (husband/wife thing... husband is going to set you on fire if you tell his wife), you get to break some stuff, and you're donzo. plus she gets no chance to argue because you're just smashing her computer, etc.

nice. After 350 posts I thought the worst ideas were out but this proves we can still go worse.

i'm not a pro at getting cheated on

Obviously the facebook crap should be nixed for legal reasons.

Other than that, I really think you need to consider more than yourself here. Do you have to? No, obviously. But if he's the sole breadwinner and she's the stay at home mom you could be doing two things:

1. You tell her and she leaves him and has no way of providing a good living for herself

2. You tell her and she realizes 1. and stays with him which is just giving him a license to walk all over her once he realizes this (true, he is now, but it could be much, much worse).

If you do tell her I would do it in private and not let the guy or your girlfriend know that you told her. Let her make up her mind all by herself, that way you're at least eliminating 2.

Of course, some positive may come from outing him but compared to the negative, I think it's a bad idea.

As far as Alobar's idea that everyone likes, just breaking up with her with standard "it's not you it's me reasons" is kind of good, but not foolproof because for all anyone knows she might hate OP and have an overwhelming feeling of relief "Oh, good, now I can **** that guy without worry about this anymore, later".

If you really want to be vindictive I would stick with the flowers from the lover play or the "I have an STD" play. To say that you don't care about what happens to the wife and kids just shows you have a lot of growing up to do, which is clearly hard for you to understand right now. Like DrewDevil said, you're not married, but they are. They have lifelong financial commitments and you're going to get involved in that because your girlfriend is ****ing some guy in his car? Get a grip.

I know he stuck his business in yours first, and by business I mean his dick and by yours I meant your girlfriend's, but the bottom line is, be a man, not a middle schooler. And if you're going to eff with er, just eff with her, not him or his wife or his kids.

(It seems like the STD thing would **** with him without ****ing with his wife and kids because it could be resolved without his wife finding out while still really messing with his mind)

Seriously though, relationships are complicated. You don't know the context of his infidelity nor do you know the potential results of you ratting him out and the only motivation to do so is out of vindictiveness. Not to mention that OP is risking severe bodily harm by attempting to ruin another man's marriage.

I also tend to be of the opinion that men are dogs and will hump anything they can, but that is an entirely different thread.

I think OP is better off trying to move forward as opposed to rummaging through a trailer park.

dump that bitch and leave .

If that is the case and you only want people to know it i'd say just leave her and tell everyone that asks the story in its full extent...

wouldnt mess with the fb account if you have friends in common which you care about. otherwise i wouldnt give a **** about other people's opinion of me.

i'm not as mature as bisonbison et al. while not quite as vindictive as some other posters, either.

i'd probably go this route:
- organize your move
- tell your chick it's over and why and move out the very same day
- tell the other dude "alright, i know. i fkn hate you. you got x days to tell your wife yourself, or i'll do that for you."

and ffs, leave the facebook stuff be. as a matter of fact, i'd not mention anything about you hacking her accounts in any way (which btw was a super douchey move in my books).
also, people will know. some of your shared friends are bound to ask why the breakup happened.

Why do people say this? People cheat for all sorts of reasons. Anything from they don't get enough attention in their relationship, to they found someone really hot they want to bang, to they're a nymphomaniac. Banging in a car has zero to do with OP. It has everything to do with the fact that they are cheap, and they have no where else to go.

Saying, "It's most likely your fault your SO is cheating on you" is ****ty.

i would just empty the flat and walk out without saying a word to her.
just let her suffer in her ignorance and insecurity of what you think about her now (because that's what they always need to know anyways).
don't post pics, lock accounts or anything like that.
clearly, she does not deserve you.
you'll have a peace of mind later on, when you think back and didn't do anything idiotic.
i would suggest not to fall to her level.
take the high route and be a man.

Different kind of *******.

I've met some people who might do something scummy, but they are personable enough that you say to yourself, "I can't hate this person."

Other people just have that ******* vibe.

he said he was telling her because he felt morally obliged given what he knows. its got nothing to do with the guy or his ex, from what he's told us.

personally, i wouldn't do it because id just prefer to avoid the hastle of entering someone else's conflict, but you must understand where he is coming from.

how bout getting the f out of bad situation? starting fresh. where do you guys come up with this? all these random challenges to him like, "be a man, not a middleschooler", or thinking that he's trying to prove all the above is not necessarily implied so i dont know why you jump to it.

i dont know how you know this.

it depends if you think its damage. perhaps its a lesson he's a contributor to. perhaps he is helping the wife. its easy to say everything he's going to do is wrong if your purposefully characterize any action other than leaving as damage.

Oh come on. This is bull****. He's telling her so he can lash out and get back at them because he's hurt.