after i stack somebody, especially when i played my hand in such a manner that i might as well have flipped my cards over and they called anyway:

"unreal"

no, its not unreal. you just suck at life.

yea, what is a flat call anyway?

and a smooth call too?

can i make a jagged call?

I'm an avid horse racing fan.

I do admit to using "ship it" and "one time" in regards to my larger wagers in those efforts but, I don't use them at the poker table.

One that I don't like is "pockets" in reference to any pocket pair.

I don't get it.

"I knew he had pockets."

WAT?

Just say, "I knew he had a pair."... much better.

Aggresive call, imo.

There is nothing worse than "I'd rather be lucky than good."

This conversation, repeated every fifteen minutes for the rest of the night after you stack someone when playing live:

"Man nice hand but I can't believe you played it like that I mean all you had was a flush draw and a gutshot and two overcards I mean you you only had king-high is what I'm saying. I knew you were bluffing that's why I called with middle pair because I knew you were bluffing and had a draw and my middle pair was the best hand. But nice hand anyway I'm not angry you know but I don't understand why you would play it like that because you didn't have anything until the spade came".

.

anyone saying good luck when all-in before the river.

FFS you are there to bust them or take their money, why be fake and pretend you hope they beat you in the hand?

Thank you Jesus.

Hate that!

"I'll pay you off" I only hate to here this when i'm bluffing.

Because manners while playing poker sucks. I supposed you scream 'SHIP IT' when you beat them too?

"Flat call" and "smooth call" both mean the same thing...it is to call a bet or a raise when you didn't already have money invested on that street.

If you call a raise out of the blind, that is not a flat call.
If you bet and someone raises, and you call the raise, that is not a flat call.

So the term actually does serve a purpose.

I hate "That's why they call it poker" or "That's why they call it gambling", because they make absolutely no sense. (I think I've posted this before)

Also, not really a "saying"....but I hate hate hate when at show down, people declare their hand as "Two Pair!" when there is a pair on the board. If you are going to say anything rather than letting your cards speak, at least make a declaration that gives some indication of how strong your hand is. "Two Pair" in this context could be almost anything.

people saying "exactly what I put you on" after calling a bet with the worse hand

"ship it" is also pretty bad, but I don't mind it if it's in a brag post

Ah I remember one time a very shortstacked player (he was a good player too....though I don't remember who it was) was saying that, "One time, one time." ...... I said something like ..... You better hope for more than ONE time. And he started laughing. It was kinda funny if you were there.

"Vamoooooooooooooooooooooo"
No matter what that translates to it still sucks

I hate "unreal" whenever someone hits even the most standard draw gets there or someone experiences a minor bit of variance. It isn't unreal you moron.

"Bingo bango bongo, Vince!"

No, I sit there quietly waiting for the hand to play out. If it's a tournament I shake hands and either leave or sit back down, if it's cash I either reload or leave but in no situation ever am I going to pretend that I want someone to beat me.

In a similar vein, I dislike when people call "trips" a "set".

A pair in your hand and one on the board is a set.

A pair on the board and one in your hand is trips.

TILT

"Sick" and "so sick" are getting really old because everyone uses them, even when they get a beat that wasn't that horrible (like someone rivering a flush).

When I table my hand and the person in the hand with me says "that's exactly what I put you on", it puts me on life tilt.

I also dislike it very much when someone, in a tournament, says "The bet is 200 bucks". No, it's 200 CHIPS. Same thing when someone says "Raise 100" and another player asks "what's the raise? A hundred dollars?"

Go try to cash those chips in and see if they give you $100 nit.

Lastly, while not widely used, at least to my knowledge, there is a guy on a "home game circuit" around where I live that always refers to folding as "ditching". For example, he will be next to act and won't know it's his turn and will ask the guy next to him: "Did you ditch?" Or when trying to determine if a bettor has won the pot uncontested: "Everyone ditch?"

GRRRRRRRRR

THISSSSSSSSSSSS

Along the same vein, "Jesus show dese people dat you have a purpose for me, let me win a poker tournament"

I still say that I was the first one to say: "that's sick" or especially "That's so sick" when talking about poker, so you can blame me for that one, but now people are going nuts with saying it, like when second pair loses to top pair, thats not sick that just normal, when a two outer hits the river that is sick

sorry for the rant

Apologies, misinterpreted the purpose of your post. I think you will find when most people say 'good luck' they don't mean "I hope you beat me", they mean "neither of us can back out now, it's now up to how the cards come out and I'm not going to be a bitch about it if you beat me". Kind of like "may the best man win".

Which of course brings us to...
"sorry" after a big win - nobody is "sorry" that they won.

Anything my buddy yells after taking a bad beat in his $2.22 2x chance tournament.