lol

Lieutenant Dan's gonna buy me a suit:

Who?

vornado up butt

vornado? or sharknado?

Following the great movie Sharknado...

ah, being old occasionally has its perks.

like all my comptia certifications being FOR LIFE

Define "being old"

reached adulthood before 2011 in this case

Sure, rub that **** in my face. *******.

Is this a good time for my "CompTIA is worthless and I hate them" rant, or should I wait?

How the **** could a tech cert EVER be "for life", anyway? Tech changes! And the CompTIA tests are already out of date when they're written. Fun fact: If you took A+ tomorrow, all your questions would be about Windows ****ing XP.

Their tests are completely bogus. EVIDENCE: The Air Force mandates Sec+ for its new network technicians, so they gave us all a two week cram course before we graduated tech school. We all passed the test despite having no ideas and no experience with any actual practical security ****. The test demonstrates absolutely nothing.

And they just gouge the **** out of their customers. The test itself is like $200, I think. (IDK exactly. The gummint paid mine.) And then they make you (or, in my case, the Air Force) pay them money every year to renew the cert you already have, even though they don't actually make you verify your abilities in any way. Once you have a cert, it's basically "Pay us $X/year, and we'll continue to tell people that you're a qualified security technician even though we don't actually know that since it's been three years since you passed our bull**** test that was already antiquated even then."

The whole goddamn company is a scam, and I have no idea why anyone in IT (especially government IT) values their certs at all. **** CompTIA.

Also, they gave out a gazillion of those certs "for life," and then years later tried to charge people renewal fees or make them retest on those "for life" certs. It took a massive chorus of the Low Keys of the world calling out "fuuuuuuuuccckkkk yoooooooooooooouuuuuu" to get them to back off of that ****.

FUN FACT: I got my Sec+ like six months after the "for life" program ended, so now I'm supposed to jump through all the ****ing hoops to recertify and have the government pay my dues. But my Sec+ expires like three weeks before I separate from the Air Force, so I simply do not give a flying ****.

Eat ****, CompTIA.

Another FUN FACT: When I took the test, they gave me nothin'. The screen said "you passed!" and I was told to leave. I never got the printout saying that I passed or what my login for their ******ed-ass online cert website was. Then they insisted FOR LITERALLY TWO YEARS that I never took the test. Eventually I found out it was because they would not believe that "Keesler AFB, MS" and "Biloxi, MS" were actually the same place, and I kept answering the wrong one when they asked me what city I took the test in every time I called them at their phone number where no one ever answered and actually somehow got to talk to a human being.

**** off and die, CompTIA.

CompGorio will certify you for life for $20 and accepts PayPal

Thanks Obama.

They also could not interpret "I took it at Keesler Air Force Base, in Biloxi, Mississippi."

HOW MUCH SIMPLER CAN I MAKE THAT???

Also you do not require a test to be certified, but then there's an additional $5 convenience fee

reported for possible scam

You are way low-balling these prices. If you charge $20+$5, no one will care about your cert. But if you charge $600+$150, then people will think your cert is amazing and you'll be able to sell a whole bunch of 'em.

I am not even kidding.

Care to be an affiliate? We pay out10% after 2 sales, and up to 40% if you sell 50 or more.

I love the self righteous American rage that cover has sparked. Not a single person who is frothy to the point they are spitting with rage has read the article or even tried to figure out why the picture is like that. Dumb people gonna dumb.

some qunt just posted that rant on FB

HOW FAR THE MIGHTY HAVE FALLEN,

I USED TO DREAM OF MAKING THE COVER OF ROLLING STONE MAGAZINE, AS IT USED TO BE THE ULTIMATE STATEMENT OF LEGITIMACY FOR AN ASPIRING MUSICIAN AND IT MEANT THAT YOU HAD REALLY MADE IT. OVER THE PAST 5 YEARS, ROLLING STONE HAS BECOME LESS AND LESS ABOUT MUSIC, AND HAS BECOME MORE AND MORE ABOUT BULL****, POP CULTURE NONSENSE. EVEN THOUGH MANY OF US MAY NOT CARE FOR IT, WE WERE ABLE TO LIVE WITH IT…UNTIL THIS.

YOU…DARE…TO…PUT…THE…IMAGE…OF…THE…BOSTON…BOMBER…O N… THE…****ING…COVER…OF…YOUR…MAGAZINE!!!!????
ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR ULTRA-LIBERAL, SYMPATHETIC TO A FAULT, ****ING MINDS???
YOU HAVE NOT ONLY SUCCEEDED IN BLATANTLY INSULTING AND DISHONORING THE VICTIMS AND FAMILIES WHOSE LIVES WERE FOREVER EFFECTED BY THIS RABID ANIMAL, BUT YOU HAVE NOW GLORIFIED HIS COWARDLY AND UNFORGIVABLE ACT. WHY? BECAUSE IT WILL SELL MAGAZINES? BECAUSE IT WILL CREATE CONTROVERSY? BECAUSE YOU ACTUALLY DO SYMPATHIZE WITH THIS ABHORRENT, COWARDLY, PIECE OF ****? YOU HAVE MADE IT ATTRACTIVE AND VALIDATED THE ACT, TO A WHOLE NEW GENERATION OF WANNA BE TERRORISTS SEEKING MARTYRDOM AND INFAMY. YOU, AND YOUR KIND ARE THE REASON WHY PEOPLE THINK THAT THEY CAN GO OUT “IN A BLAZE OF GLORY” WHILE MURDERING INNOCENTS. HONESTLY, AND I MEAN THIS FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART…GO…****…YOURSELVES.

THE NEXT TERRORIST/MURDERING INCIDENT, BE IT ANOTHER BOMBER, OR A MADMAN WITH AN ASSAULT RIFLE, UNLEASHING FIRE UPON A SCHOOL FULL OF CHILDREN, IS ON YOU.

MAY YOUR CONSCIENCES (IF YOU EVEN HAVE THEM) WIEGH IMMEASURABLE HEAVY ON YOU FOR THE REST FO YOUR LIVES. I CONDEMN THIS ACT, THIS NOTION, AND THIS WORTHLESS PIECE OF **** ****ING RAG OF A MAGAZINE. MAY THE POWERS THAT BE HAVE MERCY UPON YOUR SOULS, BECAUSE THE NEXT TIME SOMETHING LIKE THIS HAPPENS, I ASSURE YOU, THE WORLD WONT.

-GO TO HELL

Elrey, you're being ridiculous. I know this because when, after the bombing, our leader of the opposition commented that we need to look at the root causes, our Prime Minister lambasted him for being a terrorism apologist, and our PM would not make something like that us. Rolling Stone article is even worse than what the opposition leader said, so I am pretty outraged.

Elrey, I think you owe the people of Boston an apology, as well as one to Mayo, who risks his life to protect you from such heinous acts of terror.