Quote:
Originally Posted by Info Shove
I still haven't grasped the concept of face, I thought you can lose face in front of one person. Anyway, fact is Filipinos avoid arguments and confrontation like the pest, whatever the reason
That post probably didn't clear up much lol. I was pretty tired when I wrote it.
Losing face is almost always a type of shame that is familial or public. The point is that other people see that her behavior was inappropriate (or not up to standard) and then she is ashamed of that.
What you were attempting to do here was appeal to her conscience for acting like a ****ty person. In my experience usually girls in Philippines just get defensive (like in this case) and then later, once they've calmed down, maybe they realize they need to act differently because you aren't buying their bull****.
Here's an example:
If there's money on a table and you can steal it without any legal consequences but decide not to because you know it's wrong then it's your conscience. If you decide not to steal it because you are afraid someone will see you and you'll then be labeled a thief, then you are afraid of shame or losing face.
As an aside, a lot of girls in Asia like foreign guys because the threat of losing face is much smaller. If they want to put on a pig nose and have their head stuffed in chocolate pudding while getting ****ed from behind, chances are that the foreign guy won't tell anyone that could tell her family about this, and also he is less likely to tell her circle of friends. If she has a bad breakup with an Asian guy, he could very easily do both of these things resulting in shame and loss of face.
Of course for some girls just being seen in public with a white guy could be a loss of face so it depends, but these are both extreme examples. I'm sure you know what I mean.