This is the best pick up line I have ever heard

I know I will never top this one in the rest of my days.

When I was in college there was this real sexy Ecuadorean girl named Priscilla I worked with at a grocery store. One day in the lunchroom she turned around and waggled her ass all sexy like at me and said "How do these new pants look? They're size 0..."

Me, instantly: "Not bad, but they'd look a lot better around your ankles."

Then I got laid in the Produce dept. office.

On a somewhat related note I once slipped a different girl the salami in the Deli cooler at a different grocery store in high school. Can't remember If I used a line there or not.

'Hi... nice legs, what time do they open?'

one time i was in an elevator with this chick, I smiled at her, she smiled back. I got off first and held on to the elevator door when i got out and with a serious face said "you coming?"

I was there (sort of). It worked (sort of).



Guess my postcount.
Want to do something infraction-worthy?

hi.

you: Hey do you have any raisins?
her: No...
you: How about a date?

Let's play war, I'll lay down and you blow the hell out of me!

You're like a championship bass, I don't know if I should mount you or eat you.

Do you work for UPS? Because I saw you checking out my package when I walked in here.

Your face or MINE!?

Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.

Your parents must be ******ed, because you are special.

You don't sweat much for a fat chick.

do you want to bbv4l with me?

ilikebunnies is lame and country, but still thinks this is awesome

a smile and a wink, you can walk away after that when you see her later shell remember you.

As a matter of fact...

You were checking out his package?

As long as I've got a face youll always have a seat.

My penus has a hinge in it.

It comes out.

And then comes out again.

Are those space pants you're wearing? Cause your ass is out of this world!

Is that a keg in your back pocket? Cause i wanna tap that ass!

My tongue tastes funny, can you help me figure out what it is?


And the classic (which im sure was said but im not going back over 74 posts), nice shoes, wanna ****?

"This video is not available in your country due to copyright restrictions."



"Hi, you're probably way out of my league but my mate needed a wingman to distract you while he pulls his moves on your friend."

prolly already been said somewhere in here

but i am a big fan of

"I lost my phone number, can I have yours?" I've never actually used it, I just think it's a good one

I walk up to them, brush their hair behind their ear and say "I wanna eat you box"

haven't been turned down yet

winnar

would def work on me!

not only is this not gonna work on that girl, she will also spread the news and you'll never get secksytime AGAIN!

Get on MSN madelief!

but what if her name is madelief

hey baby, my colostomy bags dont leak

I use a painus pump

Here have the lyrics.

Well, excuse me, but I think youve got my chair.
No, that ones not taken, I dont mind
If you sit here, Ill be glad to share.
Yeah, its usually packed here on friday nights.
Oh, if you dont mind, could I talk you out of a light.

Well, thank you, could I drink you a buy?
Oh, listen to me, what I mean is can I buy you a drink?
Anything you please.
Oh, youre welcome, well, I dont think I caught your name.
Are you waiting for someone to meet you here?
Well, that makes two of us glad you came.

No, I dont know the name of the band, but theyre good.
Arent they, would you like to dance?
Yeah, I like this song too, it reminds me of you and me.
Well, baby do you think theres a chance
That later on I could drive you home?
No, I dont mind at all.

Oh, I like you too, and to tell you the truth
That wasnt my chair after all.
Oh, I like you too, and to tell you the truth
That wasnt my chair after all.