I wish OP cared enough to actually do it.

What ya gonna do, levelers gonna level.

I dont care if it's a level, it's amusing.

I believe that's called an upper decker.

And yes, I laughed when his dad beat him with a boomerang too.

Um

Yeah I never saw it

Im clear now right?

lololololololol these made me lol hard irl



MOAR ****ED UP STORIES FFS ALL OF THEM

when did u last doughnut?

also are you Mr. Royal Flush? he disappeared and then you come along with epic stores...

tinyeyed the pic of your ex and no results :O

Please give most stories. The donut thing was very creative and funny. The poor sausage thing is ****ed up so only share the weird non disgusting stuff.

lol it would be so easy to figure out who it is, thats how I know this is made up.

Okay, prob I good idea that I don’t tell the X rated stuff. I hope this qualifies...

As i’m sure most people guessed from my boomerang comment, I’m Australian. Up until I was about 12 I lived in a very remote bushland area outside of Brisbane. It was boring as hell and I had no friends. My entire school consisted of 19 kids. It wasn’t all bad. I had a pet mouse that was my best friend.

Sometime around 2004 pokemon hit the Australian TV airwaves. I was instantly hooked. I was also ******ed. I changed the name of my pet mouse from fa got (seriously) to Pikachu.

The main pokemon trainer in the show, Ash, started training at age 10. I was already 12, I needed to get started immediately! So... I got a hamster ball for my mouse and started getting him into pokemon fights. I started off by putting him into easy fights, mostly against birds, but as he became a stronger pokemon I put him into tougher fights.

The usual order of events went like this...

I would spot a wild “pokemon.” I would pull out the hamster ball and throw it in front of the other pokemon. I would then throw pokeballs (rocks) at the other animal to try and catch it.

I started off by throwing rocks at birds. That became wombats & koalas. Later it became Kangaroos. I’m not a vet or biologist or anything, but from my experience kangaroos don’t like having mice thrown at their feet and rocks thrown at their heads. I was chased a few times but never hurt.

Eventually I got sick of pokemon... but I never got sick of throwing rocks at animals. After a while though, rocks weren’t enough. I started going deep into the bush with a knife on me and I tried to start fights with kangaroos. Unfortunately they don’t put up much of a fight. Usually they just hop away.

One day however I found a fkn giant emu! These things are quite rare in the area that I was living. They are also ferocious as ****. They can seriously kill a person even if not provoked. Here I was, a 12 year old, trying to start a fight with one of them. I remember making eye contact with it when it was about 20 feet away from me.

From behind me, I heard my mum yell out. She had followed me and she now saw me staring down an emu with a giant knife in my hand. I started to charge at the emu while screaming at full volume “AAAAAHHHH!!” The emu charged straight back at me as soon as I moved towards it. The emu was fearless. I got scared. My mom got scared And said, “You’re movin’ with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air.” I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought, “Nah, forget it. Yo home to Bel-Air!” I pulled up to the house about seven or eight And I yelled to the cabby yo holmes smell ya later Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.

Ok, Fresh Prince of Australia.