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Getting Rectal Exam...from a she-doctor

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08-28-2009 , 03:11 PM

#51

Delzek15

grinder

Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 537

i <3 bbv4l. My sympathy for your troubles. Take a trimmer to those hedges son.

Quote

08-28-2009 , 03:35 PM

#52

sofocused978

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 6,764

you better hope they don't check your prostate. I have never felt the same : (

Quote

08-28-2009 , 03:37 PM

#53

Blackmagicz

grinder

Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 491

Take a **** just before you go and don't wipe.....

Quote

08-28-2009 , 03:53 PM

#54

hosstito

adept

Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 942

Quote:

Originally Posted by brokestackmtn

I thought that was a taint....

oh wait... that's girls...and hopefully not hairy...

I love that this comes up so often on here. grundle == taint == gooch == perineum == scranus == skid pad, etc, etc.

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08-28-2009 , 04:27 PM

#55

animal_chin

the friendly drunk

Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 7,975

Quote:

Originally Posted by Princeandrew

Ive had a pretty bad past month of life consisting of diareha every day for the past month. Litterally no solid deuces since July. Ive also been suffering from some bleeding, from which is what I believe to possibly being a hemehroid, but WebMd reccomends you see a doctor ASAP bec this could lead be a legit serious problem.
So eventually im just sick of having to drop water dueces 5 times a day I decided to call the Gastrocologist, the guy doesnt have an opening to meet with me till September 30th, however I can meet with another doctor Teusday (which was liek 5 days from teh day I called).

I say fine but the secratary lady warns me that its a she-doctor. Im like wtvr no big deal but then I find out I have to recieve a rectal exam which I THINK she has to stink her finger in my crack, look at and in my crack, maybe stick a little camera up my crack, etc etc...

This suck for me because I have very hairy cheeks, and a freakishly hair crack and grundle. Ive actually looked at my butthole in the mirror before and nearly gagged.

Now the question is, how do I prepare for this day of reckoning? im considering shaving my crack, but if she sees my butthole stubble she might even think im more of a freakshow.

whats the play, AND has anyone else had to deal with this... what should i expect?

Made me lol irl.

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08-28-2009 , 04:33 PM

#56

Kuval

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 2,366

dude, if you shave it up real nice she jerks you off after

Quote

08-28-2009 , 04:51 PM

#57

dlk9s

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 22,499

Quote:

Originally Posted by Princeandrew

I find out I have to recieve a rectal exam which I THINK she has to stink her finger in my crack

She sure will.

Quote

08-28-2009 , 04:53 PM

#58

sofocused978

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 6,764

Its not just one finger either fyi. Be sure to bring a box of tissues and have your mommy on speed dial.

Quote

08-28-2009 , 06:52 PM

#59

KruZe

★★★★★

Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 47,171

[x] would read again

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08-28-2009 , 07:28 PM

#60

ihatewells

old hand

Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 1,377

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
don't let her do it. that is how babby is formed

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08-28-2009 , 07:42 PM

#61

ncboiler

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Aug 2004 Posts: 15,597

OP, just wait till Obama starts making your health care choices.

OP - I haven't taken a solid **** in over a month

Obama - but your still ****ting right?

OP - *blank look*

Obama - *blank look*

Quote

08-28-2009 , 07:47 PM

#62

LovedBySgtSaLT

veteran

Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 2,536

lucky

Quote

08-28-2009 , 08:33 PM

#63

Blarg

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 53,527

Tell her to masturbate while she's doing it. That will ease the tension level for both of you.

Quote

08-28-2009 , 08:53 PM

#64

Quagmyer

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 8,252

chuck norris gif is hilarious.
also, just accept the finger of wrath

Quote

08-28-2009 , 08:56 PM

#65

vhawk01

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 31,866

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blarg

Tell her to masturbate while she's doing it. That will ease the tension level for both of you.

Come on she is a professional, you don't have to TELL her, she knows how to do her job

Quote

08-28-2009 , 09:17 PM

#66

Tumaterminator

HOCKEY!

Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 26,045

you're so lucky

Quote

08-28-2009 , 09:56 PM

#67

AceofSpades

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 5,656

ask for a reach-around ldo

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08-31-2009 , 07:46 PM

#68

johnfortune1000

banned

Join Date: Mar 2008 Posts: 557

not to freak you out, but when she check your prostate, you are going to get a spontaneous erection.

no joke. look it up.

and +1 yeah she's a doctor, used to it.

Quote

08-31-2009 , 08:17 PM

#69

needsFH2win

grinder

Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 511

just make sure to

1. get your anal bleached
2. shave hair around your anal
3. spray cologne on your ass.

gl

Quote

08-31-2009 , 08:23 PM

#70

giarcfrost

grinder

Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 544

fart when she's doing it

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08-31-2009 , 08:42 PM

#71

allinontheturn

'Merican Dullard

Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 22,648

So you'd rather get a rectal exam from a he doctor?

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08-31-2009 , 08:48 PM

#72

High Time John

Verified Smartass

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 7,860

Ask her out to dinner and a movie afterwards.

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08-31-2009 , 10:34 PM

#73

UATrewqaz

banned

Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 9,699

Take the Sean Connery apporach, after you drop your pants and spread your legs, look back at her over your shoulder and say

"I'm sorry if I get aroused... and I'm sorry if I don't"