AKA that you are a Professional Poker Player

1. Awe

Some people are dumb founded and have no words after you tell them this. Either they don't understand what being a poker pro entails or they just don't know what the hell you're talking about. Either way, this is a popular reaction.

2. Shame

Some people automatically assume all poker pros are unemployable low lifes without any job skills or redeemable qualities. They categorize this in the same group as Welfare case. These people often think "Aww, that's too bad," after you tell them; regardless of whether or not you make more money than they do or not.

3. Disbelief

Lots of people just refuse to believe that playing cards (AKA Gambling) could ever produce any profit because they know the house always has the odds tilted in their favour. They assume that you've just been lucky or whatever and think that the Casino's hidden superstar players (AKA Shills) will one day take all of your money.

4. Admiration

Some people think that because you play poker all the time, that you must eat breathe and sleep poker. The second you say this, they bombard you with stories about "THIS ONE TIME, THE FLOP COMES DEUCE, DEUCE, FOUR... wait... DEUCE DEUCE TEN... WELL, I FORGET THE FLOP BUT WE WERE ALL IN ON THE TURN AND THEN MY STRAIGHT CAME BECAUSE I KNEW HE WAS CHECK RAISING THE NUTS." Of course, all you can do is sit there, nod, and hopefully spew some words of insight like:

"Good Read!"

or

"I think you had a feeling there, and sometimes guts in poker is what it's all about"

Even though you know, those last two lines are more BS than the story you just heard.

5. Leechiness

Fewer people than mentioned in the previous categories will try to latch on to you and absorb whatever wealth you might have accumilated. These people are regular 9-5'ers that just don't understand gambling. They don't understand that you have to pay yourself a wage with gambling or else you won't make money. They assume that because you've won $X at poker, that it is free money and that you may as well give it away.

This could be exhibited by your parents, friends or even strangers you meet.

For example,

You take down a massive tourney and ship $100,000.

As a gift, you give your mom $4000 for her birthday. She responds with, "That's it? You just won 100k and all I get is 4? I thought I raised you better."

She means no harm, she just doesn't understand what she's talking about.

6. Interest

The smallest group by far, and probably one of the best. Some people are actually interested that you play poker and they want to learn about what you do. They understand that they don't know everything about every subject in the world, and love learning new things. These people barely exist, but they are out there.

7. Disinterest

This group is non-existant. Everyone is interested in poker.

Enjoy,

Phil Laak

you are a tool. anyone who plays for anything keeps it as quiet as possible b/c they know idiot douches wil react like tards. i mean, unless you go aroudn telling everyone and then writing totally non-epic stupidly long poasts about it; you suck.

too ******ed; didnt read
tr; dr

oh and frist

i usually refer to it as full time, not professional. Though that is basically what it is.

Usually look at you funny,
Then they always ask, do you make money, how much do you make? I hate that question because obv there isn't a correct answer so I usually say enough to not work.

I generally don't like to talk poker with random people because my level of knowledge is was above teh average persons comprehention.

If im traveling it usually "business or investments"

The last time I told someone, gunshots ranged out like a bell
I grabbed my nine - All I heard were shells
Falling on the concrete real fast
Jumped in my car, slammed on the gas
Bumper to bumper the avenue's packed
I'm trying to get away before the jackers jack
Police on the scene, You know what I mean
They passed me up, confronted all the dope fiends
If there was a problem, You, I'll solve it
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it

kevroc, i believe you meant this post for a different thread

I just say I work in the shipping industry after reading that thread in regular bbv

vanilla ice ~ OP, well done kevroc, we may have missed that connection w/o you.

vanilla ice : OP :: god : kevroc

I'm jus' tellin' the facts jack.

Lotta haters in da hood.

i hate the how much have you won question

no no, but how much have you lost

are you ****ing ******ed i just told you my net profits

I went thru this with my therapist once...

I told him it was P & L.

He said show me, so I showed him my ledger.

He said, "No, show me on the doll..."

lol

You're looking in the wrong place if it's a rap record deal you're looking for. But nonetheless, nice one.

in b4 ice ice baby

I get disbelief a lot, even among people who feign interest you can tell that they don't really believe you.

So basically if it's someone I just met in passing I usually just tell them I "work for a casino". It's even kind of true when you consider rakeback.

in b4 FFFFFFUUUUUUU face

i make up a lot of stuff. it's kind of annoying when one of my friends/relatives tells somebody i just met, or is there while i'm trying to lie about it. i've played with this guy who i'm pretty confident is pro who likes to tell people he's a PI

wat

even though i'm not pro, nor is my bf [he has a day job now] but at one point he was a srs business rounder in AC. when he met my family, my gramma, in particular, they had a fit. My gma is real into jesus, nothing wrong with that, but she went off on how i shouldn't be hanging around with a gambler like that, he's unstable, can't provide for me properly.... blah blah. i told her to shut it. i said, "Gma, it's not gambling how he plays. it's a science, very strict rules, lots of math involved. it's not just throw in all you chips with whatever. [all though some people think it is.]" she still gives me hell about it every so often, and it's been two plus years.

I am a Statistical Internet Ananalyser

HULHE?

the shipping industry one is great.

saying full-time instead of professional is a pretty good idea imo.

but i just say student

I just say "well technically, I think you have to make money for it to be a job... but yeah, I play poker*laff*"


I've yet to have someone bother me with "but how much did u lose"/stories/bs when using this.

I really wish i was a winning player so i could actually make a case for my poker "career" but unfortunately I am a losing player who plays poker all the time. Im close enough to breakeven and have hardly any bills that if i weren't keeping records, I might honestly believe im a winning player.
Im close enough to breakeven that 90% of people with my poker record would be like "yeah i win lots of money"
At 1/2 nl live for instance I AM a winning player so there is this guy who think s im a pro and ask me for money, lol.
But the point is this, even though im not a pro I have to explain why I spend so much time playing poker on many occasions.
I remember one time telling a friend that I won 3k last night(which was true) in poker
and his reaction was "O, ok" thats all he said. It was so obvious that he was concluding in his mind that Im just a degenerate gambler and was secretly taking pity on me and it really hurt because instead of just saying no, i don't believe you won 3k, and I think its sad that you are a gambler he patronised me : (

My parents want me to stop and its really sad because they are probably right, but on the other hand im like at least 99% sure that if i just improved my work ethic a little bit I can easily make like 1k a month or so just playing 1/2 nl and stuff.

I really wish i was good enough to where i could talk about ev and explain how gambling works and stuff, but i really can't make that arguement because I know my ev is negative. Im like the guy who runs at -0.1bbs/100


anyway... yeah i can relate to the frustrations of explaining poker

before anyone points out that 1k is not enough to be a pro or something Im just saying that if i just played 1/2 in kansas im pretty confident i could make that instead of playing varying limits from low to high and tons of donkaments and overall losing some money. Theres probably not enough money in the 1/2 nl games in kc to consistenly make more than that playing part time and 1k a month would be really useful side income for me

Also, Im sure my presence would at best only make it more complicated to explain being a pro : )