Filthy parody,
preface: I love you filthy! this is only in good fun, feel free to come back at me
-"So I am really confused what to do, can I get some advice maybe? Yesterday I went to see the soup girl wearing my $150 Armani jacket, but it was hot so I was wearing it halfway, and showing my new $200 Dior Homme shirt underneath. As soon as I enter the store, one of my best friends happens to be in town and there at that exact second! She is a beatiful model from LA whose dad is worth about $500 million and she is all done up and wearing about $2,000 worth of clothes (on her feet). So she runs up to me and gives me a hug and asks about how I am doing... at this point soup girl is taking an order for a brocolli cheddar from some weirdo guy and she starts talking to him in a very flirty way. So while I am hugging my millionaire model friend and she is complimenting my jacket, I start to feel like I have ruined things with soup girl forever..."