Degen Stories.... - Page 49 - Poker Beats Brags and Variance

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Page 49 of 579

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12-16-2009 , 11:02 PM

#1201

RB640

newbie

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 36

Quote:

Originally Posted by hustl

[x] asian baller

lol

Quote

12-16-2009 , 11:04 PM

#1202

chillskill

old hand

Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 1,509

Biggest DEGEN OF THE YEAR!

http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/54...94/index5.html

Quote

12-16-2009 , 11:30 PM

#1203

M.A.H.P.'s

veteran

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 2,678

oh man

Quote

12-17-2009 , 06:52 PM

#1204

ManWithBrisk

enthusiast

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 69

Wall of text a few posts back was a pretty solid degen story.

Quote

12-18-2009 , 01:24 AM

#1205

RelaxedPrecision

Jared Huggins

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 1,185

Quote:

Originally Posted by T-Bagger Vance

I really hope he flips me for the fiddy, that would make this just the best story ever.

Wat do u think of my busto/robustoing him idea?

Quote

12-18-2009 , 02:45 AM

#1206

DRybes

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 4,039

Quote:

Originally Posted by Swiiftx

so the guy who posted massive text ( http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/sh...postcount=1196 ), worth reading anyone who have wasted/or not their time?

Yes, worth reading, and I linked it in my quote from you here just so everyone knows which one we're talking about on this new page. It's difficult to read because it does have a lot of Scottish slang but readers can ask here in reply if there's anything they don't understand. It reads as a very true story specifically because it is written this way. It would lose some of its impact if it was in paragraphs imo.

Read it if you like degeneracy leading to company theft, leading to a grand theft conspiracy, leading to meeting and getting connections (and tons of free gambling money) from even bigger degens within the same company, cue current situation. I really give him props for having the courage to post about it.

Quote

12-18-2009 , 02:47 AM

#1207

Gentlemen

journeyman

Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 235

Good day gentlemen,

today I shall tell you the tale of my father, the ultimate gambler degen. Bigger than all of you combined together.

Married young at the age of 19 with the wife of a jeweler's son, business was blooming and they moved to Europe to settle their growing business there.

After a few years the worth of the family business rose to around 3 million.

My father bancrupted the business (the business is fine again now, more than ever actually). We couldn't afford bread. His games were blackjack and roulette. Sometimes, he'd spend days at the casino, doing nothing but gambling, and would return noticably thinner, not having eaten, just gambling.

After he got divorced, losing any respect from his wife and children, he started to steal diamonds. Made the papers, spend a while in jail. Admitted to the theft, but gambled allt he money away before he was caught.

Upon release, he once again stole diamonds, gambled it all away, and now he is an almost 50 year old man who recently begged me for cigarette money.

Being a degen is not just selfdestructive, it also hurts the people you supposedly love.

I estimate his losses at 4-4.5 million dollars

Quote

12-18-2009 , 03:45 AM

#1208

PenaltyMan

old hand

Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 1,201

That sucks man. Also love your userID/avatar.

Quote

12-18-2009 , 03:51 AM

#1209

r1zz0

old hand

Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 1,405

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gentlemen

today I shall tell you the tale of my father, the ultimate gambler degen. Bigger than all of you combined together.

Married young at the age of 19 with the wife of a jeweler's son, business was blooming and they moved to Europe to settle their growing business there.

this makes no sense to me

Quote

12-18-2009 , 04:07 AM

#1210

KScityShuffL

journeyman

Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 324

Quote:

Originally Posted by King Niche

one time i was sitting in my house on my own i had just split up with my gf who was a crack head but she was nice.. the room was dark i was surrounded by bottles of piss half eaten sandwiches i even had a crust behind my ear i was quite sad because i was busto and heartbroken i thought maybe we would make it work and she would be my main squeese anyway she left me for a crack dealer..so at this point im feelin like ten dewey heart aching empty busto feeling and linger tilt from stacking off with a flush draw because some crotch monkey over bets the pot and i run into the swinging blade and throw up 2 clanging bricks and I just punch my ****in monitor almost put my fist through it and then i kicked my coffee table but not like a regular person no no no..i have to hit it as hard as I can with my ****ing shin!!!! wtff was i thinking im not van damme or some **** that hurt so bad i collapsed in agony and started crying i just laid there whimpering in agony sobbing and eventually the pain eased off but i had blood running all the way down my leg..i just laid there on the carpet for 2 hours staring into space i even knocked one out while laying in the recovery position i felt so lazy like a lazy slob and i smelt so rank like chinese food in a dumpster for days..i eventually get up im wearing stripey boxers and half of them is up my ass ive got my ass cheek showing but i dont care i sit at my pc and watch some 200/400 on betfair wishing i was in the game..i kept sitting at a table hoping i would have cash in my account i actually prayed to mary magdagascar..i check my emails and boooom titan poker have put free money in my damn account!!!!!!!!!!!!!! woooooooooooooo..it felt like a blessing. Its like 5 dollars..so I go straight to max but in 5c/10c or some BS where u get nit on nits and I run that **** up to 20 in no time, then I but in at 25/50 and I hit a big overset and and I make some decent bluffs I get my stack to 145..at this point im thinking ok just play this mother****ing cool dont be a degen waste of lung capacity but i say *** it i will take a shot at 2/4...

so I pick the easiest table luckily for me they are all easy and first hand I shove with the doyle brunson just for good luck everyone folds secnd hand i get AA..I shove I get 2 callers an Iwin and im oer 400 i say**** this and i goto 5/10 witha short stack what else am i suppose to do..i run this upto 3k pretty easily and step up to 10/20 and in 3 hours I have 13k..then it happened..I GET KING ****ING KING and some guy called han solo (TILTED) raises me to 30 dollars I re raise to 180 He raises to 550 I call planning to shove any flop flop comes AAA ..he says to me in chat I HAVE IT and bets the pot im like wtf ..thats areverse reversal bluff damn *** he must have it **** i cant fold i felt my heart speed up kind of like a panic attack how can i fold this my dad is in my ear saying DONT CALL he has the 4 of a kind im like no dad let me play my own damn hands why cant you go and play poker with otis redding always ****** interfering ..and i start arguing with him cant believe i have gone from 5 dollars to over a 20k pot in just hours..I call and he flips over QQ..I FIST PUMP LIKE IM OHN MACKENROE SHOUTING NOW WHAT NOW WHAT DAD HE DIDNT SAY **** TURN QUEEN RIVER QUEEENNNNNNNNNNN>>OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG I MWAS SO ****IN MAD I STARTED SPITTINGup BLOOD FOAMING UP ...PUNCHED MY SELF in teh side of the head AND STARTED SHOUTING AT MY DAD INSIDE MY HEAD IM LIKE **** OFF LEAVE ME ALONE GET OUT OF My HEAD.. OMGG IM BUSTO AGAIN I FEEL LIKE A WORM WHO HAS HAS BIN SHOVELLED WHEN THE GROUND IS COLD OR MABE STUCK HIS HEAD IN A TURD..I FELT LIKE SUCH A ****INg DEGEN I COULD HAVE PLAYED 5/10 with 13k so easily and made decent rake and maybe found me some new pussy easily when i tell em im back to being a pro...first i burnt my hand on the stove on purpose omggg i was so wasted i went out in the backyard stark naked i started climbing the trees and just trying to get back to nature and forget the damn poker..loking back id lost my damn mind that pot had eloctrocuted my noodle..it started to rain and i looked so pathetic i couldnt even get a crack whore to stay with me and I had a big hemmaroid and my white pastey body stood out under the grey sky i must have looked like a sagging bag of milk...

..all i wanted to do was grind for 18 hours a day and fester in my own filth and live the life of a poker pro grind on the mind till i die make my tomb a house of cards.. i wanted to give up so bad.. now i was busto and i couldnt see a break in the clouds or any hope the next day when i woke up i had to masturbate just so i could get out of bed i browsed 2+2 and went back to bed for 3 days..I didnt even get up to go peepee i just pissed the bed because i was busto and nothing else mattered..i kept reminded myself that atleast i nwasnt the fat sloth puppet in that movie seven where he gets locked in a bat cave and is made to eat spaghetti till his guts spill open..but this didnt make me feel any better..
whats urine and the smell of a cheesy ritz cracker ass crack when you lost a 26k pot? i didnt give a **** about pissing on myself by that point..i could of had a milllion dingelberries attatched to my ass i wouldnt have cared...i was so upset the lowest point for so long even lower than when i talked myself out of a guy giving me a BJ for $100 I just couldnt do it..i felt lower than when my mom force fed me flowers..I almost killed myself on day 2 when metallica came on the radio..i dont know how I ever made it out alive..i always swear to this day it was just the hope of being back in action someday..it lifted me out of the bottomless pit and gave me reason to live and breathe..never quit guys..not even when they are dragging your face through the ****..there is always someone worse off than you..like a guy with a glass eye with a fish in it....keep grind on the mind

LOOOOOOOOOL

This is the funniest ****ing thing I have ever read on this site!! Holy **** I think I literally pissed myself when you said you ran outside "stark naked just to be with nature!!"

Quote

12-18-2009 , 04:07 AM

#1211

Gentlemen

journeyman

Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 235

Quote:

Originally Posted by r1zz0

this makes no sense to me

Ye sorry gentlemen, it's because my father was such a weak degen I guess subconciously I classified him as a woman -_-

Quote

12-18-2009 , 01:39 PM

#1212

ufnacehole

newbie

Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 24

[ ] 75% of the degen posts are fake
[x] 50% of the degen posts are fake

Quote

12-18-2009 , 06:23 PM

#1213

vexican

adept

Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 862

[ ] 82% of stats are made up
[x] 86% of stats are made up

Quote

12-18-2009 , 06:30 PM

#1214

ringinabox

veteran

Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 3,074

Quote:

Originally Posted by DRybes

I keep trying to read, but I can't I just don't understand half the **** he's writing.

Quote

12-18-2009 , 08:50 PM

#1215

cds0699

LOSING

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 9,018

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dankgrundle

http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/54...-stars-659894/

Cliffs:
OP loses 500$ flipping
Gets depressed and suicidal
Sends pictures of his cornhole to stranger with SN written on it for 50$
Might possibly flip said 50$

degen of the month award IMO

Quote

12-20-2009 , 11:36 PM

#1216

Scorpion2

centurion

Join Date: Dec 2009 Posts: 180

Wow i cant believe i just read whole 82 page thread in 3 days ...sometimes spending as much ad 2 hrs at time reading the thread.

I think if there was a book made up of some of this stories it could potentially be best seller.

Quote

12-20-2009 , 11:37 PM

#1217

cds0699

LOSING

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 9,018

[ ] 82 page thread

Quote

12-21-2009 , 02:58 PM

#1218

ChuckDiesel

centurion

Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 129

it's 82 pages for me

Quote

12-21-2009 , 03:26 PM

#1219

T-Bagger Vance

adept

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,134

change your settings bro

Quote

12-21-2009 , 04:00 PM

#1220

DoctorFarha

veteran

Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 2,596

Quote:

Originally Posted by cds0699

[X] 82 page thread

fyp

Quote

12-21-2009 , 05:45 PM

#1221

T-Bagger Vance

adept

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,134

I mean, it's 82 pages if you're an idiot

Quote

12-21-2009 , 05:48 PM

#1222

cds0699

LOSING

Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 9,018

Quote:

Originally Posted by T-Bagger Vance

I mean, it's 82 pages if you're an idiot

lol +1

Quote

12-21-2009 , 07:12 PM

#1223

fish491

veteran

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 3,130

super tread

Quote

12-21-2009 , 11:54 PM

#1224

wiper

still catching up

Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 42,897

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dankgrundle

Quote:

Originally Posted by T-Bagger Vance

I really hope he flips me for the fiddy, that would make this just the best story ever.

jebus.

WHAT DID YOU DO??!!?

Quote:

Originally Posted by DRybes

oh, so that's what it was about.

Quote

12-21-2009 , 11:58 PM

#1225

T-Bagger Vance

adept

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,134

two different stories imo

Quote

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