Created Victory Song When I Beat Someone Headsup - Page 95

Two Plus Two Forums Poker News & Discussion Poker Beats, Brags, and Variance

Created Victory Song When I Beat Someone Headsup

Post Reply Subscribe

...

Page 95 of 97

First

45 75 85 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97

Last

Page 95 of 97

First

45 75 85 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97

Last

03-06-2013 , 03:44 PM

#2351

Jistuul

banned

Join Date: Oct 2012 Posts: 245

[x] Will be reading again

Quote

03-06-2013 , 07:37 PM

#2352

hankwhite69

banned

Join Date: Aug 2010 Posts: 1,249

http://www.youtube.com/embed/1WygW9H...yer_detailpage

Quote

04-07-2013 , 05:38 AM

#2353

iBluffdedYou

newbie

Join Date: Dec 2012 Posts: 40

Quote:

Originally Posted by Studmuffino

This one is my favorite.

Quote

06-21-2013 , 05:29 AM

#2354

Cheever L.C

enthusiast

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 70

Quote:

Originally Posted by defenestrate

Ask and you shall receive.

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I grinded, buzzed and bleary,
On an NL50 table as I'd often done before,
Eagerly I wished the morrow; vainly I had sought to borrow
From my cash surcease of sorrow in the bosom of a whore -
With the loose and lusty lady whom her patrons call Lenore -
In my heart forevermore.

Thus I sat heads up, unshaven, with a player named 'The Raven.'
He existed for aggression, treating poker like it's war;
With his beady gaze appraising, he was raising, always raising
Any two! It was amazing, such opponents I adore:
Wait for cards to loot the lagtard, massive profits lie in store!
Soon that stack is his no more.

Then my hand Fortuna graces with a pair of scarlet aces,
And I flat. The Raven raises. I delay, my spirits soar.
Call. The flop comes single-suited, and he shoves. It's undisputed:
He is begging to be looted, he's a spewer to the core!
Now he has it, something tells me. Intuition I ignore,
And I make the call once more.

"Bing blang blaow," the Raven uttered. "What the bloody f*ck?" I sputtered,
And I numbly watched the table where the Raven made his score
With a deuce and seven suited; flopped the flush, and I was looted.
What a cooler! Nerves uprooted, anger seeped through every pore.
Checked my roll, which was constructed through the nanos' endless chore:
Eighty cents, and nothing more.

"Raven in the house!" he'd spoken and, "This fifty is a token
Of my mammoth skill at poker. You'd have spent it at the store
For your groceries, I'm guessing. Well, too bad, is that distressing?
Soon I'll cash this verdant blessing; ere I place it in my drawer,
I will rub it on my titties, as I've done in days of yore.
Nothing else could please me more."

Such a rage his words did trigger, and I shouted, "F*ggot n*gger!
Shut your hole, o fishy offal that has drifted to the shore!
****** donk, you smell like midden! Hope your mom's with cancer ridden!
And the words that you have written slight legitimacy bore;
You will promptly lose that fifty, knowing naught of Sklansky's lore,
Lose that bill and many more."

But the Raven cawed his ditty, "Docs on file and cash on titty!
You're pathetic; I feel pity as I never have before:
Sing of your denied nutrition and express your true contrition,
With an adequate submission, I might possibly restore
Your pecuniary status. Bring your sorrows to the fore,
Only that, and nothing more."

Lacking money, feeling hollowed, my apology had followed,
"Bing blang blaow" from lips departing as a fetid poisoned spore,
"Of my cash I have no traces for Lenore's diseased embraces,
Nor to stuff our pudgy faces with the burgers we adore!
I am sorry for my language, ship some back, sir, I implore!"
Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore."

With my dollars he departed. I stood up then, broken-hearted,
Threw my mouse and punched my laptop and collapsed upon the floor,
And my eyes have all the seeming of Phil Hellmuth's when he's steaming,
And my awful, tilted screaming through my mouth will always pour;
And my roll from the vexation that has pierced me to the core
Shall be lifted - nevermore.

Pure Gold

Quote

06-21-2013 , 07:27 AM

#2355

shiva928

centurion

Join Date: Jun 2013 Posts: 168

and when he tilts you just rematch him, win and post the song again. infinite win.

Quote

06-21-2013 , 10:14 AM

#2356

Wags88

enthusiast

Join Date: Jul 2012 Posts: 54

Epic thread and song. Will have to come back and read more of it when I got the time.

Quote

09-13-2013 , 11:24 PM

#2357

Redsoxnets5

veteran

Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 2,292

a/s/l?

Quote

09-14-2013 , 01:21 AM

#2358

Rob_10108

A GIF from God

Join Date: Aug 2011 Posts: 7,510

'BING BLANG BLAOW' quoted by Norman Chad on WSOP coverage this year

Quote

09-14-2013 , 07:27 AM

#2359

AoO

old hand

Join Date: Jun 2012 Posts: 1,518

^ Awesome. I think he quoted it a few years back as well, don't quote me on that though.

Quote

11-13-2013 , 11:50 PM

#2360

jjjjudas

grinder

Join Date: May 2011 Posts: 654

How have I only just read through this thread! Haven't stopped laughing for hours.

Fan Boy BBB was ****ing amazing!

Chiren at the PCA made me howl.

Best thread I've ever read. Even above Doug Lee.

Quote

11-14-2013 , 12:07 AM

#2361

Kushpop

banned

Join Date: Sep 2013 Posts: 160

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...0Blang%20Blaow

LOL Just died laughing

Quote

11-14-2013 , 11:23 AM

#2362

thabighurt35

**** you Monday

Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 11,588

i still have this as a ringtone for some poker friends, never gets old.

Quote

11-14-2013 , 11:39 PM

#2363

thedawwg

banned

Join Date: Feb 2012 Posts: 38

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob_10108

'BING BLANG BLAOW' quoted by Norman Chad on WSOP coverage this year

do u remember which episode it was? i wanna hear it lol

Quote

11-15-2013 , 02:38 PM

#2364

Rob_10108

A GIF from God

Join Date: Aug 2011 Posts: 7,510

I don't, I do know it was super early in the tournament though.

Quote

11-24-2013 , 11:53 PM

#2365

ch3ckraised

stranger

Join Date: Nov 2013 Posts: 8

BEAT
I FORGOT MY 2+2 USERNAME AND PW

BARG
[IMG]http://s24.************/nprlr287p/WELCOME.jpg[/IMG]

Quote

11-25-2013 , 02:42 PM

#2366

Next Level

grinder

Join Date: Sep 2013 Posts: 644

Online borgata poker? Wtf?

Quote

11-26-2013 , 02:55 AM

#2367

jkwan

enthusiast

Join Date: Nov 2013 Posts: 65

this is amazing

Quote

01-05-2014 , 04:43 PM

#2368

coolerboy123

journeyman

Join Date: Aug 2013 Posts: 288

G.O.A.T

Quote

01-06-2014 , 02:25 AM

#2369

thabighurt35

**** you Monday

Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 11,588

this still makes me lol whenever i watch the vid

Quote

02-02-2014 , 04:25 PM

#2370

Gimlet_Pkrz

centurion

Join Date: Sep 2012 Posts: 110

Thread delivers.

Quote

02-02-2014 , 07:54 PM

#2371

Davino

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 7,552

Quote:

Originally Posted by ch3ckraise

ch3ckraise: BING BLANG BLAOW
ch3ckraise: CH3CK RAISE IN THA HOUSE
ch3ckraise: I JUST WON $50.00 FROM YOU
ch3ckraise: U COULD HAVE USED IT TO BUY SOME FOOD
ch3ckraise: BUT YOU CANT NOW
ch3ckraise: CUZ IMMA CASH IT OUT
ch3ckraise: AND RUB IT ON MY TITT1ES
JohnnyDeep: a/s/l?

P0kerchick76: nh
ch3ckraise: BING BLANG BLAOW
ch3ckraise: CH3CK RAISE IN THA HOUSE
ch3ckraise: I JUST WON $50.00 FROM YOU
ch3ckraise: U COULD HAVE USED IT TO BUY SOME FOOD
ch3ckraise: BUT YOU CANT NOW
ch3ckraise: CUZ IMMA CASH IT OUT
ch3ckraise: AND RUB IT ON MY TITT1ES
P0kerchick76: reported

JohnnyDeep: a/s/l? LMAO

Quote

02-02-2014 , 08:40 PM

#2372

Davino

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 7,552

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nice Try

This could possibly be Krisity Alley playing online.... lmfao

lol

Quote

02-04-2014 , 06:01 PM

#2373

Davino

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 7,552

Quote:

Originally Posted by defenestrate

I love this thread and feel compelled to make a meager contribution.

Lo! Bing blang blaow! Your stack is mine.
In celebration, I attest:
While you cannot afford to dine,
I'll rub the cash against my chest.

You call me f@g, insult my mom,
My ethnic origins impugn -
To no avail, for I am calm
And sing the merry victor's tune.

Your satisfaction thus denied,
Deprived of nourishment and chips,
You cede your final shred of pride
With "Bing blang blaow!" upon your lips.

Good sir, my evening is complete
With docs on file and cash on teat.

well done