As I begin to post more on 2+2, I thought I would post this "letter" I wrote years ago... [warning: this is a long letter]

---------------------------------

I wish to extend a hearty bravo to the xxx County police department for the great job they did Saturday shutting down the dangerous poker game in their county. No doubt the 21 officers (deployed in full SWAT gear) were stunned at the lack of resistance put up by the motley assortment of two dozen lawyers, brokers, engineers, and the occasional wife/girlfriend. By all accounts, the players at the game simply lay quietly on the floor as the police (hidden behind ninja masks) brandied their assault rifles, stepped on the occasional player, and screamed that one @$!#ing move would get the offender shot.

One could imagine the officers sitting around after the bust and querying, “Man... What kind of poker players were these? Yeah, they didn’t even put up the resistance found in the typical Crack Den. Did you see the way that lady cried when I stomped on her hand... geez... she cried like a... like a girl!”

In defense of the players’ inaction, they may have been intimidated by the way the two dozen officers smashed in the front door and streamed into the private home. Undoubtedly, if the officers had allowed time to open the front door, the players would have been more brazen and a bona fide blood-bath would have ensued. As it turned out, a lone officer with a writing utensil and a notepad could have handled the whole thing. Alas, apparently no pens were available, so the police were forced to rely on their somewhat less wieldy AR-15s. As one officer noted at the crime scene "Can you believe there is this many people here and not one of them is holding anything?" [Disappointingly, the police did not find a single player in possession of any drugs, weapons, etc. - nonetheless, they were determined to justify the taxpayer's expense associated with the "sting" operation.]

There was no wiggle room in the plastic & metal cuffs they used to bind each player (my wrist marks lasted over a week), and the officers wisely left the criminals bound throughout the 3+ hour arrest. As a side note, props to the honest officer who, after cuffing the last of the suspects, admiringly fondled the Paulson top hat & cane chips used at the game while telling a fellow officer: “Hey look at this - REAL clay chips... we need these in OUR game.” Less impressive were the officers who gave randomly inaccurate information about what was happening - you are not being arrested... you ARE being arrested... You can go home shortly... You will be going to jail... etc.

In addition to bagging the house cash and chips as evidence, the agents boldly removed cash in player’s pockets. Frankly, if the cash were to be distributed among the officers after the bust, who could say they did not earn this untaxable bonus, with their brave heroics Saturday night.

Congratulations are also in order for the xxx County Department of Corrections. These hardworking under compensated laborers rarely have the chance to exercise their power over a group of white-collar professionals and they did a great job capitalizing on the opportunity. Inferior departments might be satisfied with simply verbally abusing the detainees; ensuring they remain sleepless, dehydrated and hungry; failing to process them for the first 20+ hours; and keeping them all standing shoulder-to-shoulder in a single holding cell decorated by traces of human fecal matter. But xxx County really went the extra mile to demonstrate their contempt for the prisoners. They wanted to ensure that the incarceration period would be unique and unforgettable for all involved, lest the inmates enjoy the experience so much that they lose their fear of prison.

Notable quotes from the All Night-All Day event included:

"We will process you in about 2-3 hours" [Commitment made every four hours or so, when inmates would ask how much longer until the booking would occur and the detainees would be charged with something or released.]

"Yeah, none of the phones in that cell work. We might be able to get it fixed on Monday but this is the weekend. " [Officer's response to concerns about the inability to contact anyone for bail]

"Shut up @#$!head. A Phone Call? We provide the phone, its up to you to complete the call" [Officers' response to final pleas for a working phone, or help contacting spouses that remained ignorant of the bust and were frantically contacting hospitals]

"Look out that window again and I will crack your head. Don't any of you look out that @#$#ing window. You have 4 hours to make bond or you go to general population" [Apparently windows in cells are only for looking in]

That being said, the corrections officers were NOT without a sense of humor. When an older inmate in a different holding cell (not part of our group) began having seizures, the officers cleared the cell and then stood, stared and laughed with each other for a while, before finally heading off to get a doctor. It is surprising that they did not record any of those entertaining moments for posterity, since the videotape footage would have been equally compelling on Cops or America's Funniest Home Videos.

On a more positive note, it was great to see the affection and admiration that xxx County has for its Hispanic residents. Several Mexican inmates that had the audacity to sing while incarcerated were summarily removed from the cell and dragged away, never to return. Particularly impressive was the treatment of a prisoner suffering from the pepper spray he received in the face prior to arrest for public intoxication. After clearly asking for help with the pain, an officer responded “Hey $@#$er, do I look like a Hernandez, or a Rodriguez, or some other #$!@ing **** name to you? I don t speak that amigo talk so shut the @#$! up and deal with it.” To deal with the pain, the drunk 5’5” (and 100 lb. soaking wet) man foolishly ran his face and head under water spreading the additional pepper spray from his hair into his eyes, ears, mouth and nose. Upon seeing the man writhing in the cell, the officer opened the door to laugh and tell the "amigo" how #@$!ing stupid he was.

Lastly, honorable mention goes to the phone operator at the jail, for gems like this one: Yeah, your husband is here and waiting for bond. Why didn't he call you? Well I'm sure he would rather be in that cell than with you! [Response to woman that figured out what had happened to her husband, contacted the correct jail, and wondered aloud why her husband had not been able to make a phone call]

Overall, a job well done. These fine civil servants have made our streets safer and inspired a number of us to become far more involved in local politics.

---------------------------------

After the above experience, I quit the underground poker scene (and officially became a Libertarian). Strangely, this event was both a "beat" and a "brag" for me... I was an executive at a large company when it happened, and the CFO was NOT pleased when my name made the papers (they listed all the players). The misdemeanor charge was ultimately dismissed and expunged, but the damage had already been done, and my career at that company was effectively DOA. As a result, 6 months later I left and founded the firm I now manage. The success I have achieved over the last 5 years would never have been possible were it not for this trigger event. In addition to significant wealth creation, the inherent flexibility has been a blessing for my family (not to mention allowing me to travel to AC & Vegas for legal poker games more often).

sucks bro

cliffs?

A humorous tale about the inabilities of the police when dealing with underground poker. Very good read.

JT

cool story bro.

tldr unfortunately

Could have been entertaining if there was resistance.

wow amazing letter, I am happy to hear about your success after this incident. Cops are sometimes just as bad as criminals, only difference is they have a badge.

sick beat... did any of the lawyers sue for something ????? i mean there's alot of potential material to sue for...

very very good read... that is complete garbage if it went down like that stated.

I seem to remember reading something like this when the game at Sugarloaf got busted. I was 19 or 20 when that happened... so that was 4-5 years ago I guess.

Good memory. It was indeed the Sugarloaf game.

nice embellishments itt

So shady.

This game had a mantrap at front door cameras on the outside to see who was coming and going and employed armed off duty sheriffs for security. It ran multiple nights a week and had a ton of traffic in what was otherwise a quiet suburb in the heart of bible thumping south. There were undercover monitoring the game for awhile this was not going to be something the cops were going to handle any other way than they did.

At least things turned out well for you

No issues with the game being raided. BIG issues with the behavior of the officers and jail personnel.

Jail sucked

My friend used to deal at an underground card rooms here in NYC. It got busted by the cops earlier this year and he was held for two days. They don't hold the players but even then, I rarely go to them b/c if they do bust it, they confiscate the funds so the risk isn't really worth the reward, IMO.

I played at Sugarloaf a couple times back in the day.

All the nits seemed to be respectable people, yes, lol.

But there were a few people of questionable integrity out there though. I mean, it was usually 4 tables of 2/5 NL, this wasn't a neighborhood home game or anything.

There was at least one guy I knew who played there who was a pretty serious bookie. And of course about every Asian 9-ball player in town that had a rubber band roll was out there check/shoving 7-high flush draws, hahahaha

that food sure was the bomb, can't forget that

Hey, I'm from Roswell and I think I remember reading about this. You really don't play in any games in ATL area anymore?

Were you one of the guys that ran Sugarloaf?

Always wondered what happened to them, glad to hear you're doing well.

If you're the Scott I'm thinking of we might have played pool at the Pool Room a looooong time ago, haha.

Great letter, was it directed at the police (chief?) and if yes what were you trying to accomplish with it?

[ ] bust itt

At the time, Catharsis.

Haha i remember hearing about this and i live in Valdosta. Great story though op. enjoyed it