For the love of humanity someone close this thread of AIDS already.

More lol's.

Sorry Paul D you don't have the speaking stick, and you didn't use "I phrases"; "I feel," "I think" . You could have berated someone and pushed them to the AIDS'er side.

2 + 2 forums as racist therapy.

This thread is really a passive aggressive thread about how Fly said hurtful things to people and now Fly's posts need to be directed in a way so not to be so hurtful to people.

Fly needs to work for a large corporation so he can two spend two totally enjoyable days in "Crucial Conversation" training.

This.

And also whats LOLtastical is that team #whatever has concocted, out of thin air, this whole silly story about how intolerant newbies are always being run out of Los Dos Politards by team #normal 'berating' them, 'yelling and screaming' at them, and acting 'uncivil' like the Hillsboro Baptists.

It's pretty telling to me that they can't/won't even quote one simple example of this allegedly common phenomena. The reason being is that isn't what's happening, of course. What does really happen, however, is that well known regs on team #whatever like to keep posting their stale old regurgitated derpitude regarding intolerance.

And when they do so team #normal enjoys, and rightly so, pointing and laughing at said well known regs. So their argument really is this... I, as a well known member of team #whatever, am never going to change my derpish behavior, even after being pointed and laughed at... and I, as a well known member of team #whatever, feel all butthurt and have my, oh, so, sensitive personal feelings hurt when people point and laugh at me.

I know the notion of allying oneself with someone who maintains prejudiced views is hard to imagine, but it truly is important if you are in fact interested in bringing about lasting change. Finding common ground is key, and on sticky issues like his bigotry it can be helpful to remember that we all are prejudiced in certain ways and to certain degrees. As the one tasked (in your case, perhaps self-appointed) with assisting in the change process, it's your ethical responsibility to approach the person in a way that best serves the process, and 100% of the time said approach will involve forging a relationship.

Hey, the job is not for everyone, and no judgment here if it's not your cup of tea. But truthfully, from a mental health perspective, opting to berate bigots is your prerogative...but doing so for the purpose of changing their perspective is evidence of distorted thinking in some form or fashion.

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Big difference between challenging bigoted ideas and trying to change the people who have them.

I know this has been mentioned before, by both others and myself... the reasonable goal isn't 'converting' the out-of-the-closet intolerant. The reasonable goal is to get them to STFU and stop attacking civil society with their hateful speech. Thereby, for example, opening up a respectful space for our sisters, and our brothers, and our none-of-the-abovers from our LGBTQ communities.

It doesn't really matter if they are still intolerant in their "secret hidden heart". Why? Because this whole alleged concept of this "secret hidden heart" is a buncha stupid crap that team #whatever uses to make themselves feel better about themselves. Intolerants are as intolerants do... just that simple.

And once again, I'm seeing a conflation of an interwebs forum with real life. Sure, IRL bonding with an intolerant might (or might not) be an effective way of 'converting' them... but that simply isn't going to work on an open interwebs forum... how could it possibly?

And we're still waiting for one quoted example... just one will do... of all this alleged 'berating'. We can't even get simple questions answered regarding all this alleged 'berating'... like are there any examples of such ITT.

Pretty telling, in my book.

And how about going into your smarty-pants phone app, and turning off this spammy signature... big guy.

Nope. Nobody really cares what some random on the internet thinks about them. Try again.

So why the thread about how to talk to racists on the Internet?

Why the thread about anything?

I'll take this as a confirmation that people do care about what people say about them and this thread is an attempt to steer that conversation about them in ways that won't hurt their feelings.

Does it hurt your feelings that people disagree with you in the Obamacare thread?

Of course not. They're wrong, you're right, and you're going to tell them why.

When somebody holds a fundamentally unacceptable position, you don't "find common ground". What you're really talking about is demonstrating empathy, but doing that doesn't have to be part of any degree of acceptance/acknowledgement/validation of the racist's point of view.

The common ground is that we're all people, and it's up to the side acting otherwise to get with the damn program.

Did we reach a consensus on berating the fat ****ing 10-year-olds who are going to come looking for free candy tonight?

We should emphasize with their fatness, try to understand the hidden emotional needs that draw them to food.

I prefer letting them behold my empty house tonight... but sure, berate all the little snot buckets. It's called a 'trick or treat', amirite? Taunt them with some candy, then pull it back and eat it yourself, while telling them their 'trick' is to go get lost.

Fly's not wrong in calling racist things racist.

I don't see how that has much relevance to anything itt.

Nobody is saying the fat kid isn't fat. It's how you try to get him to be less fat that is being discussed.

Bingo. Fly said called people racists who didn't feel they are racist. Now we are discussing how we should talk to racists without calling them racist.

Nope.

Trip report on how many eggings you get.

FWIW, it seems like denying candy to fat kids is completely backwards. They're already fat, they're just gonna get the candy somewhere else. What these do-gooders should be doing is denying candy to skinny kids. Focus on saving the ones that aren't already obese, don't be an enabler.

Bullying fat people is wrong, even if it comes from good intentions. Did I win?

FYP.