Yeah for sure, but that doesn't really say much to describe his relationship with her, it just says he's kinda messed up. It was definitely weird, but he is really stupid so maybe it just came out sounding worse than he meant it. Although I'm not sure why he would have to mention her boob size in an attempt to explain her bulemia. I don't know, I like to believe he has a good relationship with his kids (they are definitely important to him) despite being a crappy person.

Messed up people tend to have messed up relationships with their children. I mean, it's a leap for sure, but not much of one.

i think you could just leave it at 'messed up people tend to have messed up relationships'...

That comparing her to his daughter thing is being told out of context to make people think he's a pedophile.

lol

I mean, I considered this, but there's not a lot of contexts where those are totally okay things to say, I'm struggling to think of any.

unless you're implying gorie hasn't been completely honest with us, which I have also considered, but I don't want to go there.

I've been praying that this simulated wood paneling stuff comes back into style, hopefully this is a sign of answered prayers.

I know a woman whose boyfriend once commented to her daughter (with the woman present) how big her breasts were getting. The daughter was like 17 at the time. The woman says she got mad and kicked him out immediately, but that was like two years ago and they are still together. She's a successful executive, he's a bass player in some ****ty band who delivers pizza when he's not playing music.

Cliffs: Many many women out there are just ****ed in the head and refuse to see the obvious.

I've said numerous times I don't really think he's being inappropriate with his kids but that it's weird (like, to me the bed thing seems like it would encourage dependency issues more than anything). I told that story in the exact context it happened. He was laying in bed with me telling me about her suicide and I asked if she's had suicidal tendencies in the past and he said she had bulemia a couple years ago and then said something about her low self esteem and peer pressure and her body being like mine but a teenager and he can show me a picture of her later. I didn't take it to be as bad as some people in the thread did even though I obviously thought it was a little strange to hear the way he said it too.

I'm being honest about my perception of everything that has happened, but I realize that my perception of things could be off from reality. And I definitely have a role in it being just a sexual relationship and him treating me like crap in that regard. Anyway, of course it's extremely possible that the way he interacts with me as a girl he uses for sex doesn't match up with his overall personality. I am more likely to see the dark sides because that's the context of our interactions in my mind. I have absolutely no idea how he is with his family. In pictures with them they look totally normal and happy. I do feel bad for people thinking he's bad with his kids because of things I've said, because no parent would want those kind of accusations going around. Some of the comments in the thread started to encourage the bad thoughts in my mind about that (especially after her suicide attempt), but as I keep saying, I doubt that is really the case even if my mind has gone there to even question it.

My 8 year old wakes up in the middle of the night and climbs into our bed pretty much every night. Granted, that's not the same as us going to sleep with him in a common area, but in other societies families sleep together in a common room as a standard. I think you're reading way too much into this. How is this thread 500 posts?

Maybe if more people had responded this way it wouldn't have encouraged the creepy pedo vibe. I did say from the start I didn't think it meant anything inappropriate sexually was going on, but was questioning it more as some weird dependency issues and just seeming out of the ordinary for a father to be sleeping with his son regularly at that age, but assume the whole divorce/comfort thing was a huge part of it. But I think even Supernanny would say it was bad (the kid is actually 9 I was wrong with the age not that a year matters)

Lol at thinking she isn't being honest. Stop talking about the worthless dude already

i hope you posted that deadlifting video in h&f(i assume that's why it exists), you could use some work there.

anyways beating yourself up about this sort of thing is only going to do further damage. you wanted sex, you just happened to be getting it with attractive yet douchey/creepy dude. so what? you aren't going to marry the guy(i hope? xD). the fact that you are beating yourself up for it after the fact is just making it worse.

seems like the problem is that you are probably getting into the mindset that there is something wrong with your actions and that this makes you a bad person and maybe you don't deserve more than you have, which just sorta puts you into a permanent cycle. it should go: 1. want sex 2. get sex 3. feel good after. you are doing it wrong.

gotta be honest with yourself yo. also this thread is probably not helping in general, though i'm sure the positive feedback that you have received feels good. you do seem a smart(at least literate)/attractive woman. the world is yours. gl.

if you're genuinely worried about his kids put a call in to social services and they will open a case. probably already happened if his daughter was in the hospital with a suicide attempt. grunch obvs

I couldn't resist asking someone who appeared to be linked to creepydude, "What is your opinion of creepydude? Stable/normal guy? I feel uncomfortable asking but can't help it."

Response:
"My opinion of creepydude. Well I guess that wasn't the question that I had expected. I would consider creepydude special in his own unique ways. Is that a vague enough of an answer? However... you used the words stable and normal in the same sentence and I probably never have.

Oh and to be totally forthcoming I do know them both. In fact as much as I hate to admit it we are cousins. His brother and I used to hang out quite a bit. Me and creepydude not so much. "

I said "better cousins than best friends "

he said "I would agree with that."

Sooooooooooooooooooo yeah, here come the I-told-you-so's.

Sounds like a good thing you had the conversation. Should make it even easier to turn the page.

Be honest OP how much time have you spent with this guy in the last week?

Find it hard to believe that you haven't seen the guy in a week and still haven't gotten over him despite how clearly ****ed up he is.

Haven't seen him since. I almost relapsed but luckily that didn't happen.

I did feel really depressed last week so I've still been thinking about him and feeling crazy. But I don't expect to see him again.

He's 100% showing up to your house drunk when he hears you've been asking about him.

No he won't. I was the one who texted him last week to come over. He said he can't because he has his kids. Then he asked "tomorrow night?" and I didn't respond because I didn't know if I'd feel as horny/stupid tomorrow night. then he txted again saying "is that a yes?" and I ignored that too. Then next day he txts me around 2pm "tonight then?" and I didn't see it for awhile and he texted again "is that a no?" and I decided to say ok. He asked what time and I asked him when he wanted to and he said a couple hours, which I assumed meant around 5 so I said it had to be after 7 and he said whatever works for me and to let him know. Then around 5 he texted saying he couldn't come because he got sick and thinks he has the flu and thought he should let me know. and then says "this sucks." of course I don't believe a word he says. SO that was that.

blah blah blah.

gorie,

lol gorie

My cousin also almost had a relapse but he got luck in that the only store in town didn't have beer.

exactly