ICN, Why do you think the TR implies she is cheating?

Seems more to me like she was just influenced by alcohol and woke up with a "wtf happened last night". I'm not implying d10 took advantage of her or anything, but just maybe she is a person who is a lot different drunk vs. sober.

Also, anyone else think of that Louis CK skit with the whole "wanting to be wrestled down"?

I think the nature of the communication between you two this week will clear up most of the hanging questions.

this page is awesome


partygirl,

girl must have just not been physically attracted to you, or you came up not as likeable as you were in your messaging.

rafiki,

lol that TR is insane. id almost have been tempted to see her again to see if she would do some weird ****

amazin,

do any of your work friends associate with this girl? that seems to be the best way to get back in. otherwise you are gonna have to chip away or something, which is a delicate balance of being creepy and not. she could be being cold because she felt snubbed before, but more likely she isnt interested.

d10,

interesting TR. makes sense now why she was non-responsive because she apparently has some borderline rape fantasy thing going on. now that you know you can prob feel free to be a little more aggressive next time.

I don't know if that's the case though. That's what I was thinking this morning so I got a bit aggressive trying to get her clothes back off but she was resisting in a more serious way. It was kind of a playful wrestling last night with her laughing and only half fighting me off.

I'm not sure if this is relevant but I have blinds over my bedroom window/no curtains. It gets bright in my room when the sun is up. I sleep through it so it's nbd to me but she seemed concerned about it last night, mentioned I should get curtains, and wasn't sleeping comfortably this morning. Also things didn't start going well last night until all the lights were off so maybe she's self conscious of her body in the light? Or just really annoyed she couldn't sleep longer.

Wasn't planning on contacting her again and I get the feeling she has other guys lined up so I wouldn't be surprised if she's done with me as well.

PartyGirl: lol wow, good story I guess

I signed up for OKC about two and a half weeks ago and have had six first dates, two second dates and the first of the six dates turned into hanging out for two weeks (we met two Monday nights ago and I ended it this morning, but she agreed that the chemistry wasn't there...I'll call her girl A).

A and I exchanged a bunch of texts before the first date and I felt like she was overly excited and overly planning. I suggested that we meet at a beer garden in my neighborhood and she jokingly told me that she has a theory about guys who like to schedule the first date in their own 'hood. I asked her what that theory was and she said that guys who do that tend to be less polite, less kind and more into casual hookups. I jokingly wrote back "wow, most women usually need to meet me first before they discover that about me". Then I told her we could meet in her 'hood if she was more comfortable with that. Then I suggested a neutral site and finally she decided that she would come out my way (we met at a bar/restaurant about 15 minutes from my house). We had a good time and the conversation was great and she seemed to really dig me. Then we left that place and she said something about wanting to get ice cream and another drink. So I suggested that we go to the beer garden in my neighborhood as it has an ice cream shop next door. She said sure so I drove us there. I parked in front of my house and we were going to walk to the beer garden but she asked if she could use my bathroom. Then we have a glass of wine at my place and some other drinks and then next thing I know I am getting it in. I drove her home at 3a. This was on a Monday night/Tuesday AM.

Then we begin texting every day and I feel like everything is moving far too quickly. Which is weird, b/c we already slept together. I guess I don't think the sleeping together part is a big deal but the need for her to check in every day and see how I am doing was a bit much. We hung out about seven times in the two weeks, which is a hell of a lot. The chemistry wasn't there and I didn't think the physical chemistry was very good either, and we all know that's a requisite to a good, strong relationship. So last night I texted her and asked if she would meet me for a drink this evening. She eventually figured out that this wasn't going to be a "fun" meetup and she sort of forced me to end it over text, which I did not want to do as I feel like someone you have slept with deserves to be told that in person as opposed to through the phone machine. Luckily, she agreed on the lack of chemistry and I told her that it felt like we were friends who were hooking up and that was not a good situation. She wanted to give it more time but she understood. We're going to try to remain friends/hang out sometimes, which is good b/c on our first date we discovered that we have a mutual friend and I really like her group of friends. We are both 32 years old FWIW. Our first date was on Monday, June 24th.

The next night I had a date with Girl B. I didn't really like her and she didn't look enough like her photos. Not fat or anything. Actually she is thin and had the same body type as she did in her photo. Her hair was different and made her look unattractive. Just no attraction and I thought our personalities didn't click.

The next night I had a date with Girl C. I had high hopes for this one as she is Venezuelan (I like South Americans) and almost my age (I think she's 31). She had nice cleavage but her personality was really bizarre (I thought she was on drugs) and she had one or two lazy eyes (her eye contact sucked). I stupidly offered to drive her home and really regretted doing that b/c it felt like it took forever.

Girl D met me at a bar in my neighborhood so we could go to a comedy show nearby. She showed up way overdressed (and I was underdressed) so I told her I'd run home real quick and change. I asked if she wanted to wait for me there or go to my place with me. She opted to go with me and she helped me pick out a shirt. Then we had a glass of wine and chatted for a while and it turns out that her best friend from back home is one of my second cousins, which was quite bizarre. She told me I was cute and then we started making out. We did that for a while and then she had a great time at the comedy club. We went back to my place and again I am getting it in b/c she couldn't keep her clothes on. The sex was meh and she slept in the middle of the bed which drove me insane as I had only a small sliver of mattress to myself.

Girl E was cool although a little shorter than what I prefer (I am 6 feet and like tall women). She is about 5'2" or 5'3". We met at the same fancy bar that I met Girl B at. We each had a drink there and then we went to a hotel bar across the street and each had another drink there plus two appetizers. Really cute, nice hair and nice chesticles. She seemed to be digging me. I walked her home and hugged her goodnight. We had our second date on the Fourth of July and watched some fireworks and shared some innocent kisses. I would see her again but I don't think I see her as someone with long-term potential. Hard to say why. We traded some texts but she doesn't seem interested in going out again. Meh.

Girl F and I met for a drink this past Saturday night and this was the first one that didn't look enough like her photo. She was overweight and I think she could sense my disappointment. We had a drink and then I suggested we go for a walk (I didn't want to sit through another drink). This date lasted 75 minutes.

There are a few other prospects that I am checking out. Online dating sometimes feels too much like interviewing. It's sort of fun but I have my doubts that I'll meet my next LTR through this medium. However, I am going to continue for now.

TD,

That's a really bad Facebook status, well done.

ok decided to write the long one while I wait for my spot in the dynasty draft in SE.

I meet up with this girl (27), I'll skip the online courtship part because it's boring. We meet, she's tremendously beautiful (8+), and has the best big real rack I'd ever dated. First date I don't kiss (never do), second date kiss after dinner. Third date I'm back at her place. She lives alone, has a dog, and is really really sweet (makes me dinner, just generous and nice). An all around nice person, loves animals, loves her job. We have a lot in common, and I'm thinking jackpot. She tells me she wants to take it slow, which as it turns out almost always means "I don't want to go slow, I just don't want you to think I'm a slut". 3rd date fooling around is intense. She has no AC, she's almost swallowing my face, it felt like 100 degrees in Vegas. It quickly accelerates to her going down on me. Tremendous blowjob, I'd say enthusiasm in a BJ is so much more valuable than skill at times. The curious part was that this girl flat out refused to let me return the favor after I was done (first red flag?). That's very unlike me, I'm not particularly used to getting to nut, and just walking home. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, but at the same time I thought about it a lot. I walked home (she lived close) feeling happy and kind of stoked. Frankly if I was going to get to do that every 3rd day or so, this was going to be a killer summer.

4th date we play pool or whatever, end up back at her place again because we have to let out her dog. In hindsight I'm beyond happy that she never got to see where I lived, would have sucked. We walked her dog, watch a movie, empty a bottle of wine, and it's round 2. I finally get her into her own bed and down to just her thong. Her body is RIDICULOUS. I mean pinch yourself curvy. But she keeps covering herself with her blanket or arms. I stop and ask her why she's doing that. She goes on to explain that she was teased almost her whole life. She's a real soft talker, and some how some way, she'd been teased into thinking she was worthless (second red flag). This same girl with confidence probably never beds me (maybe I'm selling myself short, dunno). I do my best to explain to her how porn-worthy her body is, she sort of believes me sort of doesn't. I get blown again, and then this time I'm able to convince her to let me return the favor. **** gets real here. I have to choke her, pour hot wax on her, hit her, etc... and she's going crazy. Then I try to get her off, not working. I mean every move I know, not working. She helps me along, and the violence with which she's rubbing her clit is honestly something I'd never seen before. Savage speed and force, ****'s not supposed to work like that, I've never seen one built like that anyway. She gets off, SPEWS/soaks her sheets, and collapses. She apologizes for that (was super embarrassed about it), says she's always been like that, and is very shy about it. Another walk home and I'm still happy but honestly a little voice in my head is telling me that this could turn on me.

Next time we talk, she says she hopes I'm not going on dates with any other girls, because she's not going on dates with any other guys. This combined with all the other flags that are starting to add up for me, combined with dates with girls a bit more sane, and I decided to tell her I'm moving on. I do it nicely, and I don't do the jerk thing of banging her first. A lot of guys would have. What followed was the most epic meltdown I've ever witnessed IRL, and keep in mind this is after two weeks of "dating". Tears, anger, fits of rage. When that doesn't work, she literally tells me that it's my loss, because she would have been ok with anal. WHO SAYS THAT? I'm not even able to find it funny because I'm consoling her for no less than 3hours. She tries to make out with me several times during the collapse. Finally I'm able to get out of there, and 2 more emails and it's done.


I now believe that that kind of girl is a lot more common than I thought, and I wouldn't be surprised to hear a lot of stories vaguely similar. Had I not gotten out of there when I did, I don't doubt that I might have been stalked for a year or whatever. Some girls are insane.


Coles:

crazy squirter into getting choked goes insane with rage after being dumped within 2 weeks of meeting, and bribes me with her dumper


Edit: forgot best part, I have to basically live in fear of running into her again at music festival with new girl, and basically have to tell most of the story to new girl as a pre-emptive way of making sure I don't **** things up with new girl. New girl appreciates honesty, I never get burned.

I never understand online girls who correspond like this... like, WTF is going on here?? Why bother to respond if you're going to chat like this?

Her inbox is probably jammed with guys like you. You're getting whatever she can spare to type in the chaos. That's one you wanna ask out immediately, and even then you'll need to be excellent to keep her from every other option she has.

Often a waste of time...

rafiki, great story, I feel kinda bad for her though. It's difficult to imagine how she's going to get rid of her anxiety/confidence issues and have normal relationships.

3 times I actually contemplated seeing how she was doing on FB. Every single time I talked myself out of it, because that would be a legit danger to my current relationship. I still wonder about her once in a while, for sure the most bizarre thing to happen to me in dating.

d10,

rafiki,

A+, id like to reserve the rights to write your screenplay plz

d10,

i dont think its that unstandard to not have morning sex? dont think it implies anything ICN said at all. you could have also satisfied her the night before and she didnt have the energy for the morning. seems like nothing to worry about

also this

From what you said at the start of the TR, I would be very tempted to stick with this one in the hope she could get over her anxiety issues. If you can invest some time trying to help her be normal and it even half works, life's gravy.

The insane with rage bit is clearly offputting but you wouldn't have had to see it if you didn't ditch her so you'd have been none the wiser (for the time being)

Yeota, this is a situation where the girl made subtle hints that she was interested in me, and I didn't act on them because I'm shy and extremely socially awkward. I think she feels snubbed, and also thinks I'm a standoffish quiet guy. Honestly, I've showed all the charisma of a wet mop.


My chances here probably aren't high, but I still want to try. Ill have to go slow. I basically want to show that I'm a nice, friendly guy, and make her laugh. She's not going to be receptive to me when I approach her, so I need to have a good plan to break the ice.

I've got a ton on my plate work-wise and am getting a bit bored of being online- deleted my POF and OKC profiles. I'm sure I'll be back (unless it magically works out with the girl from last night) but I've got a few numbers I haven't yet followed up on to keep me busy anyway.

Any reason to worry if the girl from last night goes to creep my profile and sees I deleted it? I don't want her to think it's because of one date with her.

movieman, pnazari,

THIS WAS ALSO IN DC! I think I might be eskimo brothers with Louis CK now because that's exactly the same girl he was describing. Only I guess she learned her lesson with him and realized now you do need to make it clear it's consensual.

I'm sure that for a lot of guys, that's probably the jackpot. The reasons it wasn't for me:

-Frankly that's way too much work to get a girl off, that would get old after a month

-That's the kind of girl that gets jealous if you talk to a female friend of yours. I've seen that pattern, and I guess I decided the juice wasn't worth the squeeze

-You have to make a decision early enough to decide if the breakup now is easier than the one in a few years. To me it seemed like the risk was just too big. Someone that imbalanced could really be dangerous to get close to.


But honestly imagine you lock a girl like that down, and at age 50 you've got to basically pistol whip her for her to get off? I'm too lazy, truth.

well idk where you work or what your work situation is like, but some ideas:

- organize a happy hour with a bunch of associates and include her
--- from here you can show how cool and fun and etc you are at the hh

- slowly make small talk with her when you see her
--- dont seek her out for this, but if you happen to be in the break room or something

- seek her out with "work related" issues (idk if this is plausible) and charm her while you are seeing her
--- dangerous because it can look needy

ATF,

"I never understand online girls who correspond like this... like, WTF is going on here?? Why bother to respond if you're going to chat like this?"

Of course, she's the bad conversationalist, that's it! Well, let's look at your chat:

"If your eye color is real i'll film myself eating my keyboard and upload the video to youtube!" - Canned generic line.

"Uhhhh... I'll have to check the fine print on my dental insurance before I follow through with the keyboard eating thing. Until then, how do you feel about meeting guys you met online who have plastic chips embedded in their mouth?" - Continuing on w/ canned generic routine, and still not referencing a single thing about either of you that might be a basis for conversation or connection.

"Consider it works. I'm ___. Are you ___?" - Once again, nothing interesting at all. My name is x. Wow, great conversation.

What on earth that you wrote did you expect to generate any kind of real conversation with her? You brought absolutely nothing to the table in terms of engaging content.

wow Diablo dropping straight truth.

Yeota, thank you for the advice, and I apologize for not making myself more clear. I play poker for a living, she works in the casino. I am not a fellow employee, which would make it much easier.

ok i thought you played poker for a living but then based on the way you described it thought you had some kind of other job also


so if you want advice how bout telling more information instead of saying "no i play she works there" so now i can say "ok is she a dealer, waitress, pit boss, etc"

Pit boss-dealer coordinater