sly search this thread for eHarmony, I asked and the general consensus was ultra bad.

Greensmoke has set the line against me at +350 for a second date with the model, I said +2000 which I think is pessimistic, probably more like +1000, will def update.


I'm def gonna hustle hard for her to take a selfie of "us" so I can make it my FaceBook main picture for the next few years no matter how things turn out with us.

yeah i was in RI for a hot second - in SoCal these days

when i rains, it pours - just set up a date for tomorrow with the hottest of the 40+ i've messaged

Sex? 1 date close?

Where in socal?

Regarding the whole booth thing, you guys are mentioning the booths where you typically sit across from each other? I really love those booths that are U shaped, because you can still sit close and they are usually so damn comfortable and have a peripheral view of the entire place.

What's the theory behind the move to multiple locations strategy?

I think it's a combo of the adventure and comfort/trust level growth of being with each other in different scenarios. Just a guess though.

It takes something and makes it more fun, not really a theory, just science.

go to Bar A, have a drink or two okay good time, inevitably, now what?
lame date: go home
fun date: oh let's hit up this other bar or grab ice cream
now instead of just doing a thing, it's a fun-filled adventure. Also, there's ice cream. Ice cream is delicious.

Generally a good thing to do if you can't think of something is drink at the first location and then eat somewhere else. It doesn't even have to be something good, Taco Bell is fine.

At least for the girls I date lol. It's more the idea of it than anything else, show's her how fun and creative and outgoing you are.

Giving your number is a bad play. I'm guessing you initiated contact with her online.. so you will have to initiate contact with her via phone. If she rebuffed giving her number out, you lost. Move on.

Move to multiple locations is like if you move to three locations, it's like you went on three dates. That's factual

So technically you could squeeze 6 dates in 1 day if you start early. Brunch, Beach, Drinks, Dinner, Ice Cream, Home/Bed. The beach time would be a pivotal turning point if the date continues on. By then you're pretty much exclusive. Lol.

If anyone cares, the girl with the unpredictable texting habits texted back just now (morning in the UK - she texted like 7:49) after almost three days saying she has been ill and so can't do tonight, has plans tomorrow and Saturday but asked about how free I am next week.

I don't believe her on the ill thing, she probably would have told me when she actually got ill, and also in two previous texts she didn't give me an answer on whether she could do Thursday (today). I'm pretty sure she was waiting on another guy but it fell through and now she's wondering about me again.

Now I'm wondering how long to leave it before I text her back, as this seems important. I want to say something that makes her see I can take her or leave her, but at the same time I definitely want to see her. I already told her I can't do Friday night (she suggested it in a text on Saturday).

What do you want me to say, we connected. Lots in common, natural in each other's company, definite chemistry. And I didn't even say I *really* like her.

To answer your questions, she started out texting me either the same day or the next day, then there was one weekend where it was two days she waited, then it seemed to get consistently 24 hours. I would wait till the next day usually, but this past Friday night she texted at just before 10pm and I texted back 15 minutes later (which is bad I know) but I was at a black tie event and I could do the old 'I'm at this big exclusive thing that not many people get to go to and look, I was deemed important enough to be invited, but oh Ye Gods, how I need an exit plan as these millionaires are sooo boring' thing so I think that was ok.

It might be that I once left it 24 hours so she thought it was best she did to not look overly keen, and then it just continued like that.

IDK about Tommytrash, but ATF makes this thread better IMO.

Carry on, gents....

So I finally got to the third message with this chick the other day and asked her out. She then viewed my profile shortly after and then I noticed she looked again last night, but.... No response from her yet.

Find this very odd and think I'm just going to write her off even if she eventually responds.

Blonde came over for date #3 as planned. We watched the hockey Stanley Cup finals, which was great. Ordered pizza and had a couple beers. She baked scotcharoos for me. I intentionally mentioned those as one of my favs to see if she'd bake and sure enough. She wins some points there. I think she's a really genuine, caring person.

She did not LKJ the couch situation and sat next to me. Good contact the whole time. We made out on the couch for maybe 5 mins and she was super into it, so went to bedroom. Fingered her twice. Got BJ. She left at 1:45 and had to wake up at 5:45 for work.

Lt22,




Sandra,

I think waiting to respond to a text is really stupid. Especially waiting a day or something. You've seen the text it shouldn't take you 24 hours to respond in nearly all cases. If you're actually busy then yeah wait on the response but otherwise what's the point? You don't need to snap respond but within 15 minutes is normal.

Since she has been a flake just tell her you're not sure when your free but you'll let her know. Then let it sit a few (4-5) days and see if she re-initiates asking when you're free. If not then you just let her know on your own and if she is still flakey it's prob best to drop it.

I've been on a few interesting dates lately.

On one, after two dates I realized this girl had nothing to say and really just wanted me to take her out. I almost always pay for first dates, but it irks me if I don't think you're genuine in your "efforts." I also hate it when people suggest a place but don't pay their share (second date was at a fairly upscale place we'd talked about, but she suggested we go to). We'd kissed after the first date but I gave her a hug and left her at the bus stop after this one. Did not speak again.

Went out with a woman who actually emailed more than me. That was a fascinating experience because it really was overwhelming (I email long). I'm not sure I'd change what I do though. If you can't deal with long emails it's not going to work anyway. .... The date was ok; we communicated easily, things were funny, wound up getting stoned at her place afterwards. But there didn't seem to be any romantic connection, we hugged goodnight. Probably see her again (we've both expressed interest), but if there's not more of a romantic connection I might seriously just see if she wants to be friends.

Third, I've been out with a bartender a few times. I did not meet her online, and so it's been very different.

Met her while she was bartending, went back solo and chatted with her during brunch. Gave her my number, we hung out that night. ... I actually don't think she knew I was hitting on her, but she's got the point now. It's moving slowly (it took a few dates to kiss), but surprisingly I like this. It's very refreshing.

When you meet people online, you know they're interested. So this whole series of dates and texts has been really different, and in some ways more exciting. Supposed to see her tonight, assuming this crazy weather in DC doesn't mess it up.

Also, she's gorgeous and seems to be as big a hippy as I am. So, perfect.

EDIT to add: The first date makes me sound like an *******. I'm really not, I don't think. I was irked because she basically stopped talking on the date. We just had different views and I think we started to annoy each other. I think it was an unspoken agreement we weren't meeting up again. I did leave her at a bus stop, but we live in DC and that's how she got to the restaurant. ...

I stand by my "if you suggest it, you need to make a greater effort to pay" comment.

I'm tired of fighting with idiots but let's lay out the facts.

Girl wants relationship.

Girl tries bars. Unable to get a guy so gets no relationship.
Girl tries clubs. Unable to get a guy so gets no relationship.
Girl tries work. Unable to get a guy so gets no relationship.
Girls tries social circle. Unable to get a guy so gets no relationship.

It's not like she just launched into online dating. It was loads of failure up until this point. Then she resorts to online dating. She has already failed in all of the above. So there is clearly something wrong if she tried all those avenues and no guy was interested.

This is the reason online dating is compiled of crazy, fat, ugly, or a combination of all three. My point is that the people in this thread need this mentality going into dates and not that these girls are some prizes. With this mentality you'll appear better than the girl and display higher value. Thus, if you are at all attracted to her, she'll be chasing you. It's a nice working formula for getting laid.

Why do you think the coolest, hottest girls I know have never had an online dating profile? They don't need one. They have tons of guys after them.

Yet people like KPowers, etc. are quick to announce how cool and hot the girl is from their messages. I can guarantee the crazy is about to come out after a few dates.

I'm "sick of the bar scene" and it has nothing to do with women. It's called growing up.

@ ElSapo post. Noticed one thing that I meant to ask everyone about recently: paying for dates.

I actually go about it in the opposite way as I think you wrote. I generally keep it separate for the first date. Once they earn their relationship status, I start paying for them more. I associate it with how close we are.

Is this backwards? SHOULD this be backwards? How does everyone else see this issue?

Everyone is going to say the guy pays. As it develops, the girl will offer unless she's a mooch in which case get rid of her.

/discussion

I think it's complete personal preference. I don't think anyone is "expected" to pay on a first online date. I still seriously offer to pay like 99% of the time, and usually women take me up on that offer, but I grew up in the south and in general just think it's kind of a nice gesture.

I also tend to just say, "you get the next one," which I'd say to anyone, friend or potential match, but obviously in a date context it can help set up the next time if you want.

Yea, I do offer sometimes if I really like the girl, I dunno. Also 3/4 of my recent dates the girl got there first and started her own tab, so it just worked out separately.

Tommy you're so off base and out of touch it's ridiculous. Please stop ruining the thread

LT22, nice TR. Liked the details. Can we make this the standard, instead of just saying we went to back my place.

Tommy,

You are way over analyzing the "tired of bar scene" line. For the most part, it's just a common and unoriginal excuse to explain why they are saying they are on an online dating site with hiding the fact they are insecure about being on an online dating site. It's not like they've stop going out IRL trying to meet men.