girl who sits opposite me at work is a 10 but she's so goddamn dry. I wouldn't really be into it at all.

couldn't resist

I'm a bit surprised with it too. Usually I get a bit worn down if I'm going out nearly every night, but I think it's the combo of better matches than I'm used to, being in a new city, and being new to dating latinas that has kept me going.

I also played a lot of poker in the past month, so I could give myself a week or 2 to just screw around here before hopefully getting back into a more normal routine. The dates are kinda fun, it's just the process of sorting through matches, seeing who I need to repond to, sending/receiving the same type of stuff for a millionth time that's getting old. Maybe I need to hire that service ElD mentioned a while back!

No, the date with yoga instructor was just luck. She just finished up with a PHD and hasn't started looking for work yet so she has a bit more free time than normal. Normally I'm only asking for dates a couple days in advance.

Seems pretty read dependent, but maybe her profile indicated that she might react well to that type of comment. It's the type of comment I'd make to a girl that I wasn't super interested in and wouldn't care if she unmatched me, but maybe she takes the sexual innuendo and runs with it.

It's come to that for me, connection mentally is far more important than physical.

Recently got together with an old crush, literally thought about her for years, and was so dissatisfied.

Even kissing her was a letdown, she was still gorgeous, but so bland.

Didn't even finish, I faked it.

Should have known, we didn't have much in common, the conversation was stilted, really just wanted to sex her because of her looks and the fantasy I'd worked up in my head.

Probably similar on her end, we didn't make any additional plans to see each other again.Just kinda left it open ended.

Decided to temp. close my OKC profile (that's where I met yoga instructor) and start swiping right about 15% on Tinder. Trying to make the whole process more manageable.

What's the deal with Bumble? I finished swiping on everyone in my area yesterday, today there are 30 new girls and like 20 of them are knockouts. Is it just a bunch of fake profiles or is the quality really that much better than Tinder?

I’m pretty sure people have written bumble puts all the highest quality chicks at the top of your queue when you start.

Exactly, but looking back at her pics she is cuter than I thought (also has a really nice body) and I probably shouldn't have done it, particularly as she said not looking for hookups but if she takes it well, the gamble pays off!

I realize that, but I said I had already swiped through all the profiles as of yesterday. So 30 new girls showed up in the last day and 20 were super hot, seems fishy.

I know my profile on Bumble showed up for a girl more than a month after I had deleted the app from my phone. I know I should have deleted my profile after I started dating someone seriously, but I figured I wouldn't show up for anyone if I never logged on. The logic in my head was that there's way more guys on Bumble than girls, and girls match with most of the guys they "Like," so no girls would end up going far enough through the pile for me to show up.

Back to the Barrin thing, not that it's for everyone, but yoga, meditation, and reading a bit about tantra and doing some of the exercises helped out my sexual performance tremendously.

Meditation in general is great and there are plenty of studies by Harvard and others that show the benefits in stress reduction, cognitive function, and numerous other health benefits. As it relates to sex, meditation helps me feel more present and less anxious about the past or present, so when I'm with a girl it helps me enjoy being with her more and not stress about performance.

Yoga is also great for building a stronger mind/body connection, but also the poses really emphasis flexibility in the hips which improves blood flow and strengthens the muscles used in love making. Once you can hold a plank pose or chair for a few minutes, it's nothing pounding away in different sex positions for awhile. Obviously there are a myriad of ways to accomplish this, but yoga is just the one that speaks to me. Adding a stretching routine centered on hip flexibility could be benificial though.

Finally, reading books like Urban Tantra, or stuff by Mantak Chia or Barbara Keesling then doing some of the "homework" on your own or with a partner can be a ton of fun and hugely beneficial. I think one of the biggest transformations is that I'm way more receptive to touch. A girl running her fingertips across my chest or stomach just drives me insane now, I think I'm just more reactive to little sensations like that than ever before. I also know my body really well and it's helped out my control and endurance.

Back in my early 20s, I used to struggle with sexual performance a lot. I would be so nervous about performance that a lot of the time I couldn't even get it up. With some learning and experience, it's a thing of the past. Now I'm uber confident in my sexual performance and I never even think about whether or not I'm "ready" or if I'll be able to please my partner. Not saying that I'll be a hit with every girl, but it's a good state of mind to be in.

I've been dumped or ghosted on the last 2 times this happened with women I had been seeing (it happened the first time we were trying to hook up), it's not fun for sure...

On the bright side, we have a hiking date set up. Originally asked her if she was free this Saturday. She said no but suggested a different day. That’s a good signal if she tries and set up a different day.

Heh, thought texting old flames and almost-flames was SOP for dudes (I think it is for a lot of us).

Thought I was dead because she was giving very short responses and then apparently stopped altogether.

BUT then tonight all of a sudden, literally while texting a friend about that, I get four texts from her that were sent 3 days ago (immediate responses to my last message to her). This time there was clear interest, but now I thought I was potentially dead bc it makes me look flaky again.

But long story short, if this holds I'm meeting up with her in 15 minutes.

First date last night was a bust. She was kinda cute, great body, good convo, and great job (doctor), but seemed a bit too conservative. We kissed a couple times but she seemed too shy about it and wouldn't loosen up. I guess that's to be expected with some of the girls in a country like Mexico. Under normal circumstances I'd probably put in the time to keep seeing her, but with other more promising options, I think I'll pass. She also explained the thing she wrote in her profile about looking for loving/naughty caresses was just a joke written by a friend.

Here's the girl, she didn't really have any clear pics and I probably would've passed on meeting if she didn't seem more DTF from her profile/messages.



Incidentally, I've matched with 3 girls recently who are either yoga instructors or huge into yoga. One's even doing a 3-day and 10-day meditation retreat in the coming months which is really cool. Being into yoga adds a point or 2 in my eyes, and they're all pretty cute as well. Should at least keep me from getting too attached too soon with the yoga instructor I've seen twice.

Also got the Coyoacán girl for a 3rd date today. Although she's kinda acting weird lately. When she messaged me 3 days ago she said "I have a proposal for you", "would you be interested in moving in with me?", she let me waffle for a minute and then said "just kidding, it's a joke. The actual proposal is if you'd like to start going to dance lessons with me". On the surface it's kinda humorous I guess, but then today she asked me to reserve May 25th for her so we could go dancing that evening. Kinda weird to be lining that up so far in advance. I think probably she likes me a lot, saw me on Tinder and got worried, and is maybe being a bit clingy/jealous. I guess I'll find out more tonight. She's been super cool and laid back up until now.

Girl last night told me I had 2 profiles showing up on Tinder even though I have had the 2nd one hidden for awhile now. So I guess it's mandatory to delete the account if you don't want to be seen b/c Tinder doesn't actually hide your profile like they claim.

I'm sore all over

Well done Sir. Persistence pays off.

Or she beat his *** for ghosting her previously .

Matched with this girl close to a month ago. Tried to set something up but I got sick and I was losing interest. Hit her up again and tried to set something up for Sunday. But she said she was busy.

I don’t like texting that much and I finally responded to a text last night today. Immediately she asks what I’m up to and wants to meet up. I’m impressed she took the initiative and we meet up an hour later for some boba.

She’s sweet and nice but I don’t find her that attractive. She still texts me so she seems interested. Might give her a second chance, maybe drinks will change my mind.

Trip report? Did you guys wrestle?

If you’re not interested, or not attracted, I feel like it’s a bad move to try and “see how things play out”. Particularly when the only thing that’s driving your interest is her interest in you. That just ends up in you being unsatisfied and her getting super hurt. I can’t imagine that’s how you want it to play out, but that’s how these things play out.

That can be tricky, because it's always possible that another date or two could cause a spark.

I've had a couple times when that happened, no real spark at first but still enough interest that it bloomed after a couple dates, something just clicks.

Usually it's becoming more comfortable with each other.

But after three or so mediocre dates it's best not to force it.
Still stay friends but don't place much on it going further.

Stay friends?
With some ranom girl that you went on a couple dates with?

Met the Coyoacán girl for a 3rd date. Long story short, I wasn't really feeling the date so at some point she asked me "so do we stay friends or something more?". So instead of telling her I wasn't enjoying her company much tonight I instead said I had strong feelings for another girl and as a result had conflicted feelings towards her. She said "ok, then I guess we are friends". I don't know why, but at that moment I felt really sad about the whole ordeal b/c up until the start of the 3rd date I really liked her and I didn't quite want to give up on the possibility of something more with her.

So over the course of the next 15 minutes, I don't really remember what we talked about, but I started to get the urge to kiss her and then she put her hand on my shoulder, so I put my hand on her hip and then started stroking her back and she liked it and moved in closer. So eventually we kissed. And it was ok, but she isn't a great kisser, kinda average. But we continued making out in the bar for over an hour, and once she left, I kinda regretted kissing her.

She's a really great girl, just a bit intense, and I don't think it's a great fit for my personality. So I feel like there's little possibility that something more develops, and now I feel bad about having kissed her.

So that's the short summary of it all, sorry if this doesn't make sense, it was kinda a drunk, stream-of-consciousness type post.

Oh and one other piece of news, the 33-year old virgin finally told me that she can't see me anymore. She said she liked me too much and couldn't handle the fact that I was seeing other girls. So I think she never wanted to be friends in the first place and was just trying to manipulate the situation in hopes that I might develop feelings for her. Probably she realized that there's 0 chance now that something develops.

More like stay friendly, always keep the referral option open.

Best type is you bang her real good and she tells her friends and they are curious.

Or at least be a "nice guy" and she sets you up with someone or at least doesn't trash you if someone she knows likes you.

Randoms around the same age/area seem to know of one another quite a lot.