She was a friend from when I worked in a different department. She was making paper airplanes at her desk (lol) and threw one, distracting someone on the phone. She got in trouble for it and during the course of the investigation, the security tapes showed me stopping at her desk. My boss questioned why I hadn't said anything about the airplane, but I didn't even remember stopping there. I texted the employee to ask about me stopping at her desk. She freaked and thought she was in more trouble and blabbed. The company took it as revealing confidential information.

Thanks man, I appreciate that- especially after reading some of the other responses lol (yes, I know it wasn't the smartest thing to do). Hoping they decide I am eligible for unemployment.

Other responses:

Not the welder type, but I will look into UPS, thanks.

I have a 401K with about 20 grand or so. I have sent an email to the benefits coordinator about penalties to take it out, etc. So I do have that if needed.

I talked to the ex tonight about the situation. She was pretty supportive. I didn't mention reducing child support or joint custody- one step at a time.

I don't understand why you think you should get unemployment. You ****ed up, again, and now you want to get unemployment? Yea seems legit

Not derailing into a flaming war because I know what I did wasn't intelligent, but are you seriously calling me a moron while spelling it wrong? I thought maybe you were being ironical, but no.

I have a Bachelors from a great business school in management. I have 10 years experience. The area is tough, but I will be okay.

It may be tough and I might not get it. It's obviously worth a shot. If I was fired for inappropriate messages, I was never given a warning for this. And there is nothing in the handbook about any of it. There was no preferential treatment. Like I said, worth a shot.

God this company sounds horrible.

Should have led with the paper airplane story- that makes it sound more like your company is ridiculous and less like you're a dumbass.

thats great...

If I were you I would get any job ASAP while looking for a job that is more of a career move. Cut expenses as much as possible and move to an area with a lower cost of living. I would research how to save money and apply it to your life. It seems that being in middle management for 8 years you should have more than 2k in savings, spending is most likely a leak.

or

put 2k on black and let it ride

good luck

How are you 36 and have 2k in savings after having been employed for 8 years straight? I would try not to touch the 401k if at all possible. With 10 years experience and a degree you should be able to find something else, you just need to do it asap.

You serious? He has 3 kids and an ex wife. I'm surprised he has 2k in the bank lol

$150 a week for 3 kids? You must have a really good lawyer.

They reviewed security tapes because someone threw a paper aeroplane?

Wtf? Mind blown. You should be happy you aren't working at this company.

Also, going through your Instant messages is pretty scummy, especially since they seemed to be looking for gossip rather than actual misconduct.

God I hate corporate life sometimes

It explains why he has 2k in the bank...

What were the terms of your firing? Can you move to have those terms spelled out in a way that isn't so hurtful? Some companies fear litigation so agreeing to a favorable termination with the company while you still have the leverage of a possible lawsuit can be pretty standard here.

If it's not a big issue just make sure that your reference is supportive and that they know the drill when they are contacted about you. Move away someplace where they don't work with your company. Become the dad that the kids see for a month in the summer. That's kind of what you did here. Gl

File for unemployment obv. Cease all communication with your previous employer. Tell your ex you were let go for conflicts of interest with management. Get the 2k savings and 401k money and hold off playing poker until you get your UC.

i think you guys are taking OP for his word too much. do you think if i were able to find the guy who fired him and told him to post his side of the two issues OP is citing, that he wouldn't shed a lot of light that would portray OP as much less short-shrifted and unlucky than OP is claiming to be?

and in case OP or someone is tempted to respond with the "why would he lie to an anonymous message board," i would counter with "because that's what people do all the time."

good luck at the 1-2 tables OP, and remember: if someone says that they have to go and then bets all their chips, they always have it.

Somebody doesn't know what a conflict of interest is.

Thanks for all the replies guys.

Lol, yes the paper airplane story is true. They are a ridiculously rigid company. It does feel good to get away from them, but I just wasn't prepared yet and the future is so uncertain.

I could certainly move back to my hometown and restart there, but it is so painful to be away from kids. I know I would get used to it, but they bring me so much happiness-I think my move is to suck it up and try to figure it out here.

I just barely got the $2k in the bank from profit sharing. Expenses on my own with the $150 a week in child support means I barely make ends meet. I am not a spender whatsoever. My phone has been cracked forever, my furniture is old, my mattress is saggy, etc.

After 10% penalty and 20%ish taxes, I would take home about $16K from my 401K if I cash it out. I guess I will wait to see if I get unemployment first.

Did your wife sign off receiving any of your 401k?

i am sure most of us have done things on our work computer that would be deemed inappropriate by our employers. what i don't understand is how can op flirt so much with the knock out girl at work to a point that people start questioning it and yet you have never hung out with her outside of work? if you are going to lose your job because of this girl at least make it worth it. it's like getting caught by your gf sexting another girl whom you have never met and losing your gf because of it.

Yes, it was part of our divorce settlement.

I guess she was just playing me. I thought we had a connection. She did sent me naked pics, but I guess never wanted to pull that trigger to hang out outside of work. Definite possibility she had a boyfriend the whole time.

OP - did the woman who asked you about her breasts or the other one get any sort of warning/punishment? Guess it would be hard for you to know, but you mentioned you still had friends there.