the bathroom habits of other human beings never cease to amaze me

avoid at all costs. hover if absolutely necessary. get the hell outta there

People that can't crap in public bathrooms are hilarious and strange. As though it were some private, secret thing that no one does and is so embarrassing you have to be sequestered and the only place you can do it is in your own house.

Anyway, ass gasket all the time please.

The more important question is this: which way do you orient the ass gasket?



or



Most people go with option 1, but I've noticed that the toilet seat cover is actually shaped to be oriented like option 2. HOW DO WE RECONCILE THIS?

wtf is with that thing in the middle? Wouldnt that just hang down int he water and get all wet???

Same here. My sphincter is more disciplined than I am.

the only purpose I see is that it automatically drags the f*cker in when you flush so you don't have to touch it

Have you really never seen one of those before?

Yes it hangs down and gets wet. The purpose of it (so I deduce) is that when you flush it pulls the whole thing down.

This, but I always end up ****ting on it and I find the thought of crap just chilln there 2 inches from my ass, sorta gross, so I rip the middle part off. I'm also 50/50 on ass jackets. Depends on the mood, urgency of my eminent **** and cleanliness of the seat.

+1 for hating to **** in public places.

I think we need a 'homebase' thread

Dude I always rip that piece off. Are you guys that paranoid that you can't even push the ass gasket down the toilet?

Fascinating. My problem with that thing, let's call it the tongue, is that it seems to me that toilet water can climb the ladder, so to speak, and reach my thighs.

why spend the extra time/energy ripping it off? if it's there might as well use it.

I'll push you down the toilet you little ****er.

If you're joking, you got me good.

The water climbs only partway up the tongue, thankfully.

SO IS IT OPTION 1 OR OPTION 2 FOLKS

hmm yeah either we got leveled or Alobarrrrrrrr

HAHAHAAAA, that is awesome. I used to never use public bathrooms for poopin cuz I knew that dudes just pissed all over the seats. Im pretty sure I messed up my intestines by holding it in for hours back in school. Now I just wipe seat down and let it spew.

Exactly. Use you hand sanitizer and clean the seat.

DUIII

Nice pun.

no seriously, ive never seen one. Like I said, I dont **** in public bathrooms.

seems like orientating the tongue to the front is kind of stupid since you are just going to piss on the thing if you do, no?

So before you eat you go and you wash ur hands you then touch the door handle knowing that lots of dudes dont wash their hands after going and then go eat food?

hahahaha weird. Yeah, you end up pissing on the tongue which is dumb, but I've noticed that the hole on the seat cover is cut out/oriented in such a way that it "fits" the toilet with the tongue in the front, like the company is trying to guide you to proper usage.

Sitting on a toilet seat with no protection probably doesn't carry any risk of disease, but if you do it enough, you are eventually going to have another guy's dried piss touching your buttocks which is gross. I'm with whoever else said use strips of TP. I think they are way more comfortable and effective than the "ass gasket"

These 'ass-gasket' things. Are they easy to find? Do you have to buy them yourself and carry them around with you in case you need to defecate in a public convenience? Or are they always present?

I don't think they exist in the UK, or at least not in my backwards part of it.

Dateline: Baghdad Summer 2003

Situation: Approximately 75 guys eating nothing but MRE's and dropping logs in two Port-O-Potties.

Logistical Difficulty: Getting the crappers emptied and refilled with blue water in a timely fashion.

The Horror: Taking a dump in a plastic crapper during a summer's day in Baghdad is like being thrown in the sweatbox from Lionheart/Cool Hand Luke. The large volume of high density turds combined with the lack of regular maintenance and the rapid evaporation of blue water in that environment can lead to only one thing. The poop level rises well above the water level and forms a crust of baked turds. The crust becomes a dookie stalagmite and inches closer and closer to the opening. Each day it grows and you know that eventually it will rise above the seat hole. It becomes a bizzaro Sword of Damocles preying on your mind.

The Ending: After 3-4 weeks Iraqis driving the SST (**** Sucking Truck) arrive to save the day. These knuckleheads think it's funny to spray each other with the blue water but still get the job done. Crisis averted.

I can just picture the music from Platoon, as you open the door in slow motion to witness the atrocity.

lol, very very nice. my faith in oot is quickly being restored. Has been pretty sweet this week.

OP,

i don't understand how the size of your ass matters. the gasket covers the entire toilet seat. how do you somehow touch 50% of it anyway??