Open Side Menu Go to the Top
Register
The Art of Not Trying The Art of Not Trying

12-17-2014 , 12:54 PM
I've been thinking about the concepts in the NY Times article A Meditation on the Art of Not Trying as a writer, particularly the sense that in crafting something as mind-boggling complex as a 400 page thriller with multiple perspectives, set convincingly in foreign locales, with correct stylistic/grammatical choices, and innovative plot--the best way to do this seems to be to free my mind, immerse myself in the moment and forget that I am doing "work" that took a lifetime of training to achieve. (Even during the revision stages, I wipe my mind clean a thousand times and look at the pages anew, with the eyes of the first-time reader)

"The advice is as maddening as it is inescapable. It’s the default prescription for any tense situation: a blind date, a speech, a job interview, the first dinner with the potential in-laws. Relax. Act natural. Just be yourself.

But when you’re nervous, how can you be yourself? How you can force yourself to relax? How can you try not to try?"

Interestingly, "wu wei" is a quality that some of the top live poker players that I have observed seem to have. Ivey, Danzer, Haxton , Jacobson. (Others like Smith, Kitai, Esfandiari, and Selbst seem to have a neurotic, compulsive strategy going, I'll have to think about this more). Negreanu is fairly unique, not sure how to characterize his style--annoy your opponent into revealing stuff?

I do know that in the 49 hour-continuous Ironman I was so tired I somehow "transcended" the tournament, started seeing things as they really were at the table, free of fear or self-consciousness. This was a particularly effective strategy in that particular tournament because it was so deep structured, the blinds never really came into play. In 99 percent of normal tournaments there is way more variance related to increasing blind levels, and one's mental strategy plays a correspondingly smaller role.

“Our culture is very good at pushing people to work hard or acquire particular technical skills,” Dr. Slingerland says. “But in many domains actual success requires the ability to transcend our training and relax completely into what we are doing, or simply forget ourselves as agents.”

Another aspect of this article that interests me is the part about wining and dining--that is of getting someone drunk, as an essential part of any business decision. This is super prevalent in Japan, where I taught English for five years, and very few major decisions are made without a long night at the izakaya. Corporate meetings can often be described as mere formality, or an in-depth sounding out (like the beginning stages of a deep stacked tournament) rather than as the venue for decisions to be finalized.

"Before signing a big deal, businesspeople often insist on getting to know potential partners at a boozy meal because alcohol makes it difficult to fake feelings. Neuroscientists have achieved the same effect in brain scanners by applying magnetic fields that suppress cognitive-control ability and in this way make it harder for people to tell convincing lies.

“Getting drunk is essentially an act of mental disarmament,” Dr. Slingerland writes. “In the same way that shaking right hands with someone assures them that you’re not holding a weapon, downing a few tequila shots is like checking your prefrontal cortex at the door. ‘See? No cognitive control. You can trust me.’ ”

This is also relates to something recently observed. A full month before I signed with my literary agent, I met with her (and an intern) for lunch and we polished off a bottle of wine and went through edits on the entire manuscript over four hours-- incidentally sounding each other out. I realize now that there is a definite method to this seeming madness. Although no money is exchanged until the agent sells the manuscript, the decision to take on a new client is not taken lightly. If something emerges in the preliminary interactions that indicates a poor fit, the offer will simply not be made and the contract never offered. You can argue that it should be the actual words on the page that sell themselves, but in today's personality driven age this is no longer the case.

So the conundrum comes down to the idea that success at the highest levels often involves forgetting your training, losing fear, immersing yourself in the totality of what is going on rather than preconceptions. Interviewing Brian Rast last month I asked him how he could steel his nerves in Big Game situations, with hundreds of thousands of dollars on the line and his reply was something surprisingly similar. Reminds me, I'll have to go back and make a podcast of that.

Last edited by shulenberger; 12-17-2014 at 01:09 PM.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 01:08 PM
12-17-2014 , 04:22 PM
I'm sure the same basic principles apply in a lot of facets of life, at varying levels of complexity.

There are a lot of mind games in tennis for sure, especially at the pause/break spots such as the serve, and anticipating the serve.. being in some sort of completely "present" state is probably beneficial. I am a racquetball/squash player myself, the principles are not so different.

At the same time, physical sports have a certain element that sets them apart from writing, or poker. Let's call it physicality. Poker is maybe halfway between the two, as you do have the racing adrenalin. With writing, adrenalin is rare, although as a thriller writer one does want the reader to experience that. So this really requires more thought.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 05:52 PM
I've had my best year in poker and I owe it a lot to meditation and learning other techniques of being in the moment. It's made my life really enjoyable as well so there's that.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 06:04 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by 0desmu1
I've had my best year in poker and I owe it a lot to meditation and learning other techniques of being in the moment. It's made my life really enjoyable as well so there's that.
Care to expand on your techniques for staying in the moment? I've been doing some of the same things: daily meditation, logs tracking focus/variance/level of play for each session, breathing techniques during moments when I notice frustration creeping in.

It amazes me that some sessions I feel like I'm in a zone and see different plays/lines that I would have never even considered before and others I can just never get out of autopilot.

Obviously it's not just for poker, but also nice to be more content/happy with everyday life as well.

Last edited by Fossilkid93; 12-17-2014 at 06:09 PM.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 06:33 PM
staying in the moment and relaxing fully are the goals. It's not easy to practice them when stress is at its peak, but with practice and mindfulness you can improve quickly.

the op, which I really like, is basically buddhism. So that is topic you should read books about if you are interested in mastering these sorts of life skills.

Always being present makes a big difference in quality of life, so its worth the investment of time researching and practicing it. I studied the Dalai Lama and I highly recommend reading about him. He is basically the person I look up to the most, he is the best, his compassion and concern for others is unmatched, and it is those traits that make his life so full of joy and happiness.

The art of happiness is a book by him that I would recommend to everyone. If you read it tell me how you liked it.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 06:37 PM
It's all-encompassing and the practice you do outside the tables will express itself when you're at the tables. If you simply try to focus staying in the moment while playing and let the rest of your life fall at a disarray, it will obv be very difficult to do stay in the moment while playing. Be mindful in whatever you do and it'll become a practiced habit.

I have a two-hour morning routine that involves meditating, exercising, reviewing and setting my goals, and doing some affirmations. This all takes place before I play a single hand. Habitually rituals help me put myself in the right state of mind before I play. This leads to more focused play and way less tilt. Being in the "right vibration" is almost 90% of the battle; the rest takes care of itself. What I, or you, actually do to get into the right state of mind doesn't matter. Your routine/ritual doesn't have to make logical sense and it can be highly idiosyncratic. What matters is that it puts you in the desired state of mind.

That being said, I would think doing any kind of improv do be a great way to exercise staying in the moment. Things like doing comedy improv, playing improvisational instruments, playing sports or participating in any activity where any instance of letting your mind slip out of the moment leading to unfavorable results would be a great and fun way to practice staying in the moment.

Oh, and it's all a progress. Don't be discouraged when you "fail." Failing is part of the journey. But I promise you it will pay massive dividends down the road if you keep at it. The difference in your tilt level in 3-6 months will be immense.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 06:38 PM
The OP is so right, the less I care about something the easier it is to do. That thought is so counterintuitive, but once you learn that its true competing gets so much easier. Whether its playing poker, pool or with girls, I have found that being relaxed and letting things flow naturally is always the best strategy.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 06:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by 0desmu1

I have a two-hour morning routine that involves meditating, exercising, reviewing and setting my goals, and doing some affirmations. This all takes place before I play a single hand. Habitually rituals help me put myself in the right state of mind before I play. This leads to more focused play and way less tilt. Being in the "right vibration" is almost 90% of the battle; the rest takes care of itself. What I, or you, actually do to get into the right state of mind doesn't matter. Your routine/ritual doesn't have to make logical sense and it can be highly idiosyncratic. What matters is that it puts you in the desired state of mind.
"desired state of mind" is basically getting your brain waves into a similar pattern. Meditating is effective because it alters your brain waves, smoothing them out so to speak.

To become the best player possible it is necessary to know about how to get into the best state of mind, that is certain.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-17-2014 , 10:50 PM
I'm an architect and I use a similar approach when solving design and technical problems. I clear my mind of all but the most simple, rudimentary aspects of the problem at hand so I can then 'see' the problem and corresponding solution.

When I am soliciting/absorbing the information required to solve the problem, I have to very emphatically force engineers, consultants and other architects to provide me with the bare bones information. This can be surprisingly difficult as everyone WANTS to clutter up the problem with layer upon layer of extraneous info that prevents them from really understanding what the essential issue even is. It never ceases to amaze me how prevalent this mindset of over-information is.

I try to teach my staff how to process problems similarly but it seems to be very rare for people to do. When I describe the technique to them I literally tell them that they need to "empty their brain" as that is the best way I've been able to come up with to describe what I do.

I would estimate that among architects and engineers that only a handful in a hundred are able to effectively do this. I would expect that it would be a lower number in the general population.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 01:15 PM
Great OP, mr Shulenberger.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 01:27 PM
great thread and ideas. it would be cool if people would illuminate on their mental process of clearing their chamber. also to note - becoming a monk and detaching from nearly everything is a form of extreme and may be no way to live.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 01:38 PM
Why is it no way to live? Can it not just be one of many ways to live?
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 01:43 PM
it is, and it's not an inherently bad way whatsoever. standing still is great for so many reasons, but if you never move again what are you really gaining? and what are you also removing from the world?
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 08:24 PM
Oops, I thought this was a thread about picking up women while putting in no effort, carry on.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 09:02 PM
The ironic part about mastering the art of not caring is that before you can not care, you have to be very, very proficient at caring.

Once you have your particular art or skill mastered, you can get away with the blase (BLAH-ZAY) approach and make it work.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 10:02 PM
Here's a cool video regarding paradoxical ideas like "trying without trying."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKv8Zw2uqO0

Essentially, how I understand it, is that when you can hold two seemingly paradoxical ideas and move forward, you are progressing as a human being. Just because an idea is logically faulty does not mean you cannot express it in some way. It just means that your mind hasn't developed enough to hold those ideas together. It exists in the realm of possibilities. The more paradoxical it is, the more nuanced and subtle it will be. But it does exist somewhere, and you can tune in into it.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-18-2014 , 10:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by wombat4hire
The ironic part about mastering the art of not caring is that before you can not care, you have to be very, very proficient at caring.

Once you have your particular art or skill mastered, you can get away with the blase (BLAH-ZAY) approach and make it work.


"You've got to learn your instrument. Then, you practice, practice, practice. And then, when you finally get up there on the bandstand, forget all that and just wail."
-Charlie Parker
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-19-2014 , 02:58 AM
This is a really interesting thread and I really like that Charlie Parker quote. He is one of my musical heroes--his music was so effective in creating a pattern of real life. Just as I might read Kerouac to get a visceral sense of being in San Francisco or Times Square in the late 1940s, I might listen to Charlie Parker to get the tone poem improvisational mood. That said, I am listening to this equally improvisational **** right now.

Poker is like music in a lot of ways... the best players improvise based on who is sitting at the table, balance their range and image in ways that make sense on macro and micro levels. That is what consistently impresses me about Negreanu and about up-and-coming players like Colman and Jacobson (not to mention Danzer, Haxton, and Smith). I believe that improvisation is related to mindfulness and being "in the moment."

One of the most interesting 2014 WSOP events I covered was a final table featuring Mustapha Kanit, Brian Yoon, and Dan Smith side by side. There was so much high-level poker internal dialogue going on, I also slipped into the zone observing them from a few feet away. It was really one of the highlights of my poker life so far, particularly considering the realizations about poker and life I had in December 2013 at the Ironman.

(Smith probably never wants to remember that tournament again, considering the correct reads and terrible luck he had against Kanit four times in a row. Almost as bad as getting called by threes all-in with A-K and busting 18th in the ME).

Last edited by shulenberger; 12-19-2014 at 03:14 AM.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-19-2014 , 03:21 AM
Almost forgot the best part, Pfutzenreuter was reading "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" at that final table.
The Art of Not Trying Quote
12-19-2014 , 04:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by shulenberger

Poker is like music in a lot of ways... the best players improvise based on who is sitting at the table, balance their range and image in ways that make sense on macro and micro levels.
A lot of things in life follow fractals. I find them very elegant as they are both infinitely simple and infinitely complex. What makes a good piece of art is when a theme is both displayed prominently at an obvious level and interwoven in its fabric as well. However way you look at it, the theme expresses itself fully, identically.
The Art of Not Trying Quote

      
m