Cheat
I’ve been reading through the posts about this guy and being reminded of an eerily similar situation in my own life. Early on in my poker career I was scammed out of a large amount of money by a fellow poker player who turned out to be one of Britain’s biggest con-men. He was being watched by local authorities at the time I knew him for stealing on the order of 1.5 million pounds and is currently serving time for that offense (although he may be out by now).
Suckers
What the experience taught me was that I was only a poker player in that extremely confined environment of “the game” and that when it came to a point in which I really needed to detect deception, I had failed.
Think about it. You spend lots time thinking about how to make good bets and play cards, only to piss it away in another environment(whose consequences are equal) by not detecting a real life bluff and having strategies to protect yourself. The sooner you realize that you are suckers and stop trying to get your money back the better off you will be. You will be playing legal games or personal games, which if you think poker rake is high, wait till you try and get a lawyer or spend loads of time hassling someone to pay you back. The aggravation it will cause you will hurt your ability to play poker. You’re better off trying to move to the next stage as soon as you can. Which is to become…
Grudgers
Grudgers are people that have been cheated before but learn from the incident and craft life strategies that make the event less likely to happen in the future.
For instance I developed almost an extreme anti-social ness toward any type of interaction with any poker players whatsoever instead focused my social energy on having most of my friends come from non-poker places as well as becoming closer to my family. I am not going to argue that this is the best strategy but it was right for me at the time. Jason Ho actually pm’ed me 2 years ago after I wrote an article for the magazine wanting to pm and discuss strategies about games, and luckily for me I was in my full on anti social mode concerning anyone wanting to discuss poker and never pursued it.
You will all learn your own methods. For starters you will want to learn how to detect deception away from the poker table. The best book I have read on the subject is
Dissecting Pinocchio by Christopher Dillingham. I knew it was the best book on the subject the moment I looked at it. It is everything that deceptive people are not: cheap, un-flashy, technical, and extremely useful in many environments.
I wish you all the best in moving on from your instance, and from looking at just of the replies to this thread it seems quite likely this guy is a scammer(although I would have to establish some sort of “normal” behavior for him before I could tell for sure). He has already exhibited two “tells” in his denial. In scientific studies concerning people making false denials liars show a 100% increased use of expanded contractions like saying
“I did not” vs “I didn’t”.
Another such slip of the tongue is when liars confuse past and present tense. Lets look at the ever important portion of any scam the denial.
Quote:
I will also reveal my side and responses but no one has given me anytime to do this.
Everyone is saying I am scammer but I am being trialed without a judge it is not fair. Everyone is looking into my personal life but not into the personal lives of the accusers. It is not fair. I am no scammer and don't want to be treated like a scammer.
Notice the confusion of past vs present in his statement “trialed”. Also notice a 75% usage of expanded contractions(“it is not fair”, “It is not fair”, “I am no”). I would have to know his normal patterns to be certain, but this is enough for me to not believe his denials and to start looking for other classic signs of deception.