hey koop. interesting post. i've got like 4 years more of grinding online than you. it only gets worse. you're right. You lose more than $$$$(at first) you lose TIME. Worth way more than money. Value your time. Spend it wisely. Invest it in good, conscientious, profitable, rewarding, beneficial, and pleasurable activities.

Don't forget that humans are really pack animals. Our instinct is to be part of a group and surrounded by other humans. We crave interaction. Online grinding is isolating. Don't isolate. Find social hobbies. Play less online poker. You'll probably be happier, and more focused when you do play and profit more. We rarely play as well in hours 6-10 than 1-5.

The purpose of life is to find meaning. Find your own purpose(s) and pursue it with all you are. Focus and simplify. Write to clarify your thoughts. Speak often with interesting positive people. They will rub off on you.

Your purpose in life should be personalized. Avoid being a materialistic uninformed boring POS. thats not your purpose in life. thats the one that the ads and commercials want you to be. In the absence of a defined set of beliefs we absorb others' viewpoints. How unsatisfying is a life spent pursuing another person's goal? Its like going out, picking a girl up at a bar, spending money on her, and using all your charm to have her come home with you and walk straight past your bedroom to go bang your roommate. very unfulfilling.

Basically what I'm saying is: Define your life's meaning and you'll bang more chicks. I mean that literally and figuratively.

OP quit his job and became a full time poker pro. So he wasted just as much of his time as he would in any other job. Poker was not his hobby. It was a profession, a grind, just like any other job.

If he couldn't handle being a pro and everything that comes with it and balance his life, then he made a mistake 2 years ago and poker has nothing to do with it.

better than a 9-5 for now

im addicted to paying bills

Nice post

so what kind of bad beat caused this breakdown?