Post? You mean multiple threads.

Not sure if this is "thinking" but,

Borgata 1/2 on Saturday night. Young guy dressed in all leather suit with many gold chains, rings and watch drinking champagne has his girl sit down behind him. He quickly loses 3 buy-ins then directs the following question to the table, "man, I ain't caught a joker all night. Where are all the jokers in this game?" He quickly lost another 2 Buy-ins and left down a $1000 in 20 minutes. He never caught his joker.

I wish that joker was playing at my table

The right thing for you to do in this situation is to nicely take him to the side and explain that it's a 52 card deck and the jokers have been removed. Then you could explain how deuces are wild and he gets a progressive bonus if he gets four deuces. : )

That is stupid. Why on Earth would you get it all in 5 times without ever having a wild card?

We was obviously trying to catch a joker on the flop. Duh.

wow....

A new table is opened at $3/$3. It takes a couple of minutes for everyone to sit down as the dealer who is asian is dealing, when he's about to deal to the CO (aggro 20 something asian reg) says "I'm going to wait for the big blind" he was joking as it was the first hand and you don't need to post..

the dealer skips him. The reg goes "wait! man where are my cards!?",

"sir you said you'll wait"
"I was joking it's the first hand. Are you new here? DO YOU KNOW ME? You must be new here!"
"I'm sorry sir"
as the dealer is organise the pot the aggro kid keeps stirring him..
- "im sorry for what happened but I must concentrate on the rest of the table now"

then the reg says something really aggressive in Filipino and the dealer has him 86ed!!

hahaaha he called the dealer a son of bitch. geez it esculated so quickly. Pretty absurd to joke around with the dealer and then go all ape **** when he doesn't understand your 'humour'

I was playing 1/2 at MD Live right after the recent filming of Poker Night in America. The guy sitting next to me had just been saying that he had started playing a couple months ago. When discussion of the webcast started he was saying that he would have run over that table if he had only had enough for the buy-in, you just needed to know when to fold.

Not poker related but if you think poker "thinking" is absurd, your head will explode if you ever go to a baccarat table.

" i know i'm beat " " i call "

I hear this all the time!! People do this for their whole stack too. "I know you have me beat, but, ALL IN!!!" It's to some fish like the point of NLH is to go all in. Doesn't matter if you're way ahead or way behind or even drawing dead. They don't give any thought to their stack size either. ALL IN!!! Woot!!

I heard this on Tuesday at a 1/2 table, after facing a normal bet with an opponent on an OESD on the turn, a guy tanks and calls. The draw misses and the bettor leads again trying to steal. Caller reluctantly calls and wins. He says,"I was sure you had an overpair and had me beat. I really almost folded there!" Loser says,"yeah, you should've."

That's right up there with "I know you're bluffing. I fold."

But not as good as calling down with 9 high because "I knew he was bluffing"

Don't remember where I heard that, possibly this thread.

"He hadn't played a hand in an hour, didn't think he had anything", as V pushes Q6 on a Q73 two tone board into my Cbet w/ KQ. Obviously got there too.

Sometimes you can get people to show by saying this. It's like they want to prove they had it and you get some free info without calling.

2% of the time or so this one can actually make sense but only if you are on a flush or straight draw and V bets enough to get you off of it and you don't have enough behind to reraise him out of the pot.

REALLY? That is what you took from that???

2/5, I raise $15 UTG, guy on my left 3bets to $250, as each person subsequently folds behind him he begins calling out their holdings from previous hands they sucked out with, saying "well I got ten seven out of there... there goes thee four... king five is gone" until he scoops my initial raise. I guess he wants to make sure that when he loses it's against a good hand.

playing 1/2 at a casino.

CO and BTN limp, SB limps, and I check option with 66 in BB.

flop: 65Add

i donk/3b/call BTN for 200bb pot, he shows AKo and says 'you got aces?'

Once heard an older lady ask the dealer, "How many bets are allowed in this game?" After she was sat at a 2/5NL in Tunica. Needless to say, I cancelled all plans for the next 8 hours. What a fun day.

At a 1/2 table a few days ago. It's 4am and this reg on my left has been drinking for the last 5 hours and at this point is completely wasted. He's buying in for the minimum and just shoving every hand. He's finally completely busto and leaves the table. The reg on my right says (without a hint of sarcasm): "I'm glad he left, it was too easy to take money from him".

Reasonable comment. Those players are being taken advantage of.

Erm...

The whole point of being a pro poker player is taking advantage of other players and taking money off of those weaker than you (I never thought I'd be saying that to a Poker pro)

And that would also be an absurd thing to say at a poker table.