Hello everyone

So I'm thinking about what to do now that the stuff hit the fan and I have the option of continuing poker or not continuing poker and I need advice on what to do...basically need an honest assessment

I have played poker all my life recreationally but when i lost my job 2 years ago, I kinda came across poker by accident by winning an FPP tourney and I had some part time jobs and along with poker i survived...when my part time temp gigs ended i started poker full time and within 6 months I had my BR up to 20Kish...I then went to vegas and played live cash for 5 months and made another 25K or so

The rub is I have a gambling problem, so I'm prone to tooling out on blackjack or playing cash above my bankroll and I don't really have a stop, so I can have 5K in cash one day and zero the next...I can maintain bankroll standards for a while but at some point the gambling bug overtakes me and voila i'm broke again

95% of the time I'm ok, but the other 5% eats me alive

Now that Black Friday is upon us I have to give myself an honest assessment of my skill at poker along with my propensity to lose it, and assess opportunities to make a living and I need your help




This is my MTT and SNG graph from sharkscope as of February...Notice that my mtt graph flattened out a lot...this occurred just after Pokerstars could not take more money, so I'm pretty sure the competition was a lot tougher and is probably even tougher now....I also think my situation affected my play since I noticed that I have a 10% roi over that span despite a 22% ITM...so my ROI went down and ITM went up and I was probably pressing a lot since i wasn't making much money...just enough to pay rent actually and eat a few things...My "breakeven swing" occured right after i lost 14K in black jack and was down to a life roll and a stake roll

So...I have some money on merge, but i'm wondering if I should take the money out and seek a new form of income somehow...I do have some work skills, having had a good job for 7 years, but it's been really tough to find a job...I took off from poker for 3 or 4 months to find work and wnt to a string of interviews that neveer panned out between Feb and July of last year, then went back to poker and have struggled at it

I'm also a lousy multitabler since I have some form of ADD, I get really really mentally tired when I play too many tables (about 4 or 5 is my max)

So since I can't multitable and the field sizes are pretty small I was thinking of either doing cash which I might have to relearn or doing 100-500 BI tourneys, and $50-$100 SNGs...I did pretty well at $33 SNGs but the volume isn't thre right now so I'd have to do at least $100 probs to makea decent hourly ($12/hour at any game is prob fine for me right now)...although I came in second in a 109 for 17K last year, I'm not sure at all if I can beat that level enough to make a living at it, so I need your help to figure it out

Based on my stats and graph pick the option

[ ] Keep on grinding, change some of your triggers, you are good enough to beat the game for a livable income

[ ] You were good enough to beat the game back then, but now that fish can't deposit, you can't beat the players that are left

The other option is to play poker some of the time and look for work some of the time but I've found that very difficult to do since I'm an addictive personality, poker tends to consume me, so I don't think it's an option...It's either all in or fold at this point

WUG?

fold pre

tl;dr, cool brag though


if you have a gamboling problem then don't go live

gluck

say goodbye to poker imo

if its all-in or fold rather fold and do something else.

i still think the same like a month ago where we talked in skype.
you still have plenty leaks in really basic things (gambling, emotion controll, some math related stuff) but i think you could be good enough to beat the game if you fix these leaks.
but since this does not seem to be your nature the intelligent thing would be to look for alternatives and dont play this high if you dont think you can beat it.

but honestly zeal, why do you resist plugging basic leaks so hard? it really is very easy, all you have to do is stop being very stubborn about your ideas

Depends a lot on your personal circumstances imo. Do you have a family and financial commitments ? Do you have a marketable skill you can fall back on if poker goes tits up ?

After reading some of your other posts about this id say you dont have the mentality for full-time Poker even though you are good at the game itself.

How willing are you to work on your problems? You are honest enough with yourself to recognise these things but seem resigned to repeat the mistakes. 17k in a $109 then $14k at a dumbass boring game like Blackjack! Come on. You're a good poker player, what are you getting from these ******ed circus games?

If you can't straighten these things out then give it up but it sounds like you're on the edge of making a decent living from the game so it's a waste.

How can you as a good pokerplayer be playing Blackjack... it makes no sense.

Another -EV move, and another one, and another one, and another one... this is fun!

yeah...I've been thinking more about it and, in order to continue with poker, I need both a poker coach and a life coach...even if i can beat the game can i beat my gambling addiction? is that possible for a poker player?

I have no idea if I can beat that level, but if I can, I should make close to 6figs/year, which is more than I'm worth in the job market...I'm basically woth about 50K on the job market when I can get a job

So yeah, I need a life coach and a poker coach, but can someone like me beat a gambling addiction?

You forgot to include your brother/wife's account, but anyways I thought you quit like a year ago

This...is there a way to learn the mentality? I think what you mean is to treat it as a business and separate yourself from the outcomes, and that's really hard for me to do...when i lose I always tell myself I'm the worst player alive, I'm a ridiculously hard critic of myself, I always expect perfect play and get pissed at myself when I don't do it

This..the mere act of watching the cards turn with a risk involved releases endorphins in my head and makes me high...I'm pretty sure it's a genetic disposition

No not true...when I made that money in the first part of the graph, I had a poker coach...it really helped me not only by showing new things but confirming things I thought were correct...I've done better at poker when I'm coached so I think with a coach I MIIIIIGGHHHT be able to beat the game....I honestly don't really know...I think I"m close maybe on the edge

Get some adderal. You prolly aren't cut out for poker cause you're stubborn and wrong alot. You should take a long break and start from the beginning. I'm pretty sure you over think everything way to much and probably the most out of anyone. Even more than desperado. What's required to beat midstakes is pretty simple. You don't need to act like you're a 5th level genius when you're ****ing up 1 and 2.

adderal didn't work at all for me....i think a real therapist is key...you can't really have life issues like I do no matter what you do for a living...hey Tony Soprano had one!

thanks for the honest assesment guys...I'm trying to be honest with myself...The other thing is that if I don't play and get a job I don't want to be looking over my shoulder with an eye on the back door...that wouldn't be fair to the employer and I want to plan long term anyway

I was gonna quit last year but the job market was too tough to even think about but this week I feel I can get a job if I want one, so I want to make a +ev life decision

So get a job and stop posting this bull**** all the time. There's no magic answer. It takes alot of work and the right mix of natural abilities to be good enough at poker. If you're an idiot spaz maybe poker isn't your calling. Poker is like anything else, you can just hope and force it to happen.

yeah I think I'm going to get a temporary job and shelve poker for a little while but keep it as an option...Obv it's more fun and a better life than working for a living, so I shouldn't make a firm decision yet...I will regroup and make another try at it at some point in the future

thanks again all...sorry for post u don't have to read it tho cica kman

Try psychology sub forum. There's 100s of these whinny posts. "I can definitely make 6 figures but right now I'm down 8k"

holy crap i didn't even know there was a psychology sub forum...i would have posted this there...thanks man!

Np. Search first. Your case isn't special.

Got 'em!