yeah part 3
A month has gone past since the last post. In july I had rather awful swings again, I really have to get more discipline in to my BRM and playing overall. Had a few deep runs, one in the 55$ Summer Saver Hyper, which I final tabled but unfortunately finished 7th for 750$ when 1st got paid 4.5k$. When FT started I was 3./7 = ICM suicide. Gonna put some hours in the lab to study the final tables and ft bubbles with huge icm pressure. Other one I ran deep in was a 7.77$ lucky sevens which i finished 9./2000. Small score. I also won a 525$ seat to a PLO secret bounty ring event, but even though im from Finland, my lacking PLO skills resulted in a bust before the money.
Really sucks to bust in the early stages of FT/ft bubble when the payjumps start getting crazy. Especially when I have been trying to get a nice score for so long.
my graph on GG since the start of this blog: (only MTTs)
https://gyazo.com/ed8ac23d5bfb8061272e202b57ad8bc9
As one might see; progress has actually been made. I feel like my game has gotten alot better in the past 6 months. Would just be nice to get some scores but I guess they will come with time. No need to rush it. In it for the long term.
Not sure if I should reduce or increase the amount I play the huge field MTTs due to the grueling variance and should rather try to focus more on studying and cashgames and SnG. Been playing some 6-max sng on GG and i feel like i have been consistently getting on top of those. EXCEPT SUNDAYS ARE OFC FOR MTTs
Now that I have finished school except for one exam in september I will start looking for a job since the results of this poker thing have been rather volatile. My mom is a teacher and she asked me if I might want to do substitute teaching for kids under 12yo. I think it would be really good for me. After barely living off of min wage poker winnings to getting to hopefully provide value to some kids' lives for a couple of months with a stable pay. Sounds good to me. And the hours are very easy; able to keep playing and studying. And as a cherry on the cake, the job would not be at my hometown but a hundred kilometers away, which I think is a good thing because I would be able to solely focus on poker on the side of teaching. I've been spending way too much of my free time doing nonsense with buddies.
But oh man I feel like I really gotta start building some discipline and good routines. I feel like it is a crucial step to get your routines good to set yourself up for greatness.
Been getting kicked in the stomach last few sessions. Lost a 400bb pot yesterday in a live game to a one outer. Got it in real good on the turn. Really humbles you although the beats don't really feel like anything anymore.
With that being said, I will get back to this in a few months again. Hopefully with some positive things. I feel optimistic and I have faith in myself. Still been struggling a bit with mental health and I got absolutely outplayed by a brbrbrbrr drum roll... girl a month ago. It didn't make things easier to begin with but I've gotten over it.
Thanks for reading. It really feels good to type these things out. Sort of gives me perspective and allows me to reflect on my situation. Atleast when I know none of my buddies or literally anyone who knows me does not have a clue about this "blog" I "write".