Let's go ahead and just do a 1 year review... It was about this time 1 year ago that I decided to subscribe to Upswing Poker and join the lab. I really was inspired by KidCudi's post here on 2p2 and a few others but really he stuck out as THE success story it seemed like and I wanted to do what he did. Start at the micros and grind my way up. I thought it was going to be A LOT easier than it's turning out to be LOL.
I honestly feel like a losing player. Like one day my luck will come to an end and my bankroll will disappear in one quick session. I don't look at my overall results often (like yearly) and maybe that drives that feeling of no accomplishment. I tend to get caught up in short term results. I think this comes from studying a lot on my own and looking for some form of reinforcement feedback kinda thing. Like learning to weld, I lay some bead then look at it and adjust to temp/thickness/composition/etc etc but it's very immediate. In poker I struggle to find this and for me it can make progress seem impossible/unattainable.
Well here we are then. Ups, downs, plenty of looking like a fish in HH posts and comments. I'm not good at writing so let's just get down to the results.
Sites tracked - ACR, Ignition, Pokerstars (in order of volume)
Untracked results (honestly unknown but similar if not more because the pools are even softer especially like WSOP lmaooo)
Going into 2024
obviously looking to still establish at 25NL. I took another hit out of my BR to get ahold of some stuff I wanted to learn how to use. Didn't really impact it as much as i thought it was going to (funny how i don't even see that I'm winning and this generates $ i can spend) but in any case I have decided to shot take higher stakes tables as long as there are known fish there to play vs. I recently shotted 30nl one table + three 10nl tables and it went great. Game broke after I stacked a fish but I was happy to be the one who go on the table as there were 4 tables going and 3 of them were stacked to the gills with regs. The last table was 5 fish and I got Godseat lol sometimes we do get lucky i guess.
I'm including the 20k hand graph recently for Pokerstars because when I first played vs the pool I thought I would simply win no matter what and just crush everyone. Looking back, could have ran kinda bad but I think I just played like a donk tbh. Ended up feeling really bad about the downswing and it was kinda rough to even load up a table to try to play through it. I eventually decided to get a single coaching session from a player who has grinded through my fenced pool already and it really helped bring things back into perspective and motivate me again to grind. I think coaching consistently will be one of the most effective ways to augment my improvement. The results were not disappointing and I do think they were almost a direct result from a significant change in approach simply through mindset/mental barriers.
@slyless
This is maybe one of most proud samples as I feel so much looking at this. Struggle, uncertainty, perseverance and ultimately TRIUMPH THROUGH ADVERSITY. Turning around a bad streak into a winning sample in spite of running bad and finding proof that you can come out ahead even if you lose in hurtful spots (yes im still a massive mental fish)
So who knows what will happen in 2024. I thought I was basically ending this year Breakeven or losing and actually not. I think I'm finding a place where I just enjoy talking about stuff, learning more about how poker works and people approach it and less about like becoming a millionaire tomorrow. Seems like when i let go of the world and just play the hand I'm in at the moment, things just are better. Idk how to put into words, like zen. Results don't even matter, just doing and finding something in that process.
I hope people have found some kind of value in this blog. I mostly feel like it has gone unnoticed and is rather laughable. Like I said I'm no writer or anything. I am glad to have kept this up for over a year now because I tend to not follow through with a lot of things. I find a deep satisfaction in this game and not just playing it, study as well. The aha moments are really cool and exciting.
A lot of this blog has been pretty embarrassing to look back on and read through again (even worse my first one that I made). I'm not sure if I should make a new one for 2024, don't think it matters much. I am really proud of myself for how far I have come, I guess I can't take that away from me. I set goals, accomplished a lot, failed a lot and kept going. I'm motivated by a lot of you guys here and I'm not going to name anyone else specifically. I'm also really happy to have found a few players to work together with and talk hands etc the last few weeks, Poker can be incredibly lonely. Poker is kinda more than a game for me. It has opened up my eyes to so much in this last year that extends far beyond 2 cards and a pot.
I hope everyone had a profitable 2023 and going into the holidays, cheers!
Maybe in 2024 ill take some classes on writing.
Last edited by swerbs22; 12-20-2023 at 09:06 PM.