What do you call a cage without a nickel in it?



Great. I see we’re off to a fantastic start, so let me take this opportunity to welcome you to my PG&C thread. A little about myself first—then we’ll get into all the ridiculous goals (poker and other) that I have planned for 2020. Then you can all kick back with a diet Sprite and watch me fail. Tell your friends, you’re going to want to be here, on the ground floor, when it all goes down in flames.

My name is Havick and I’m originally from a no-name town in Oklahoma. Okay, so it has a name, but unless you’re from there (or kept a souvenir chip from the Riverwind) you probably won’t recognize it. I graduated High School the next town over (because my town doesn’t have an umm—school?) way back in 1999. Yup. Back when the earth was new, right? Now that I’ve thoroughly alienated 70% of the audience base, let’s see if I can push that.

After High School, I joined the United States Marine Corps. I did just over 9.5 years and was honorably discharged. I did two tours in Iraq, once during the initial invasion (2003) attached to 1st Battalion 7th Marines, and the second with 3rd LAAD Battalion winning the hearts and minds of the local populace in a vacation paradise known as the Al Anbar Province (circa 2004). Had some good times overall, very few bad days. Unlike most of the stories I read on the Internet, I didn’t do any super-secret black ops, nor did I assassinate high value targets held at CIA black sites. I participated in the original push from Kuwait to Baghdad, the second push for Fallujah, I served (way) under General Mattis, and I met Chris Kyle before he was the Devil of Ramadi.

After the Marines, I bounced around a few different jobs, never really found me. There’s probably a lot to be said on that topic, but most of us don’t come to 2p2 for philosophy or psychoanalyzing. I’ve never been fired, laid off, asked to leave… Come to think of it, I’ve never even been written up. Jobs I’ve had after the Corps, in no particular order…

1. Truck Driver (think: 1970s stereotype)
2. Detention Officer
3. Loader
4. Warehouse Supervisor
5. Wal LOL Mart
6. Software Developer

Of the long list above, I was a trucker the longest. As I hinted towards earlier, I haven’t really ever had a job that I wasn’t good at. Of course, I haven’t exactly been a CEO either, so take it for what it’s worth. Why mention that?

In all those jobs, I’ve played poker. Each and every job, outside the Corps, has just been a way to play poker. When I first began, I was unapologetically terrible. Like the kind of terrible that makes you high-and-mighty 2p2’ers suffer the same reaction as Pavlov’s dogs. Fast forward to today and I am at least not as terrible. I’d be hesitant to overstate my abilities though, as I continually find ways to improve.

This would normally be the section of the post where I explain to you that being a professional poker player is my life’s dream—my greatest ambition. Unfortunately, I feel like I’m already beyond that. Some of you may be doing this as a stepping stone to a ”bigger and better” thing, rest assured faceless Internet person, this is my bigger and better thing. And I’m not sorry.

So, I’ve made the leap. Well, sort of.

About 7-8 months ago, I packed up the family and headed west from the backwoods of Oklahoma. Settled here in Laughlin, for the time being, but should be set to move to Vegas (proppah) over the summer. I initially settled on Laughlin because it’s not incredibly far from Vegas, and a few years ago we lived in a place called Bullhead City, Arizona. Also related, $880 a month for a 4 bedroom. So, about that whole financial thing—as that seems to be the first question everyone asks.

A few years before I decided to take the proverbial leap, I went—what the kids call semi-pro. During this time, I played a decent amount of volume at the live NL200/NL500 at local casinos in Oklahoma (shoutout to the Riverwind and Firelake Grand). Because of other commitments and the whole having a job thing, I averaged between 30-40 hours a week at the tables. I don’t have exact numbers because I’ve switched phones since then, but my NL200 average was around $18/hour and my NL500 was not incredibly more, probably approaching $26/hour.

I spent a small amount of the profits but saved the majority of it and some other money from the day job. In other words, I have my monthly nut covered, with a moderate amount of freedom-spending money saved, for the foreseeable future. By my gorilla math, it equates to be around 3 years, depending on a lot of variables and whether or not I start being more modest with expenditures. So that’s it then. Roll credits.

Now that I’m here and comfortable, I still feel like there’s a ton of holes in my game. While I admit privately that this may be imposter syndrome, I really don’t want to be wrong about that. So, I’m starting from as bottom as it gets and playing online at NL2. That’s less about building a roll and more about fixing some of the mathematical aspects of my game. I’ve done a Bankroll Challenge in the past, which began in August. I took $100 to NL2 and steadily progressed to NL50, and building an online roll of $2,200. Why head back down?

During the holiday season my wife had to take a trip to the emergency room. Rather than mess with the liferoll, I took the deposit for care out of the online roll. I did this for a couple of reasons. Probably the most important being that I’m overly protective of the liferoll (at least as it applies to myself), being that if it depletes the dream dies. The second reason is that of a personal journey (in other words, I don’t expect everyone to get it). As I stated, even though I’m a winning player at this point, I still see massive potential improvements that need to be made. Bonus side note: How is it that they can reduce your overall medical bills by 60% if you’re willing to pay a couple of grand up front? It’s almost like they’re overcharging…

Seeing as how the New Year has just begun, I feel like this is a great time to, not only start over, but add it to my 2020 Crushed It List™. Currently the poker plan is to grind that roll back up and start playing live. Should I not exceed my expectations and have a $6k roll in the near future, I’ll withdraw the difference from other sources and start fresh playing live in Vegas no later than May 1st (which should give me enough time to still meet most of the goals on the Crushed It List™).
Speaking of the Crushed It List™, I’m going to post it here and update the status of my adventures at least weekly. Unfortunately, if you’re subscribed to this thread (which you shouldn’t be) that means another update in about 2 days. Most of these are self-explanatory, and all of them are overly ambitious.

Alright then:

Weight Loss, Exercise, Health
1. Lose 120 lbs
2. 1k Push-ups/day for a week.
3. 365 Days Tobacco Free
4. 364/365 Days Vegan

Writing
1. 301 Blog Posts
2. 1,500 2p2 Posts
3. 250 Quora Answers

Poker
1. 1,000 Hours Online
2. 3,000 Hours Live
3. 2,000 Hours $2/$5 No Limit
4. 1,000 Hours $1/$2 No Limit
5. Average $50/Hour ($2/$5 No Limit)
6. Average $35/Hour ($1/$2 No Limit)
7. Acquire a $50K Bankroll
8. Play 3 WSOP Events

Miscellaneous
1. å være samtale flytende
2. 2008 or newer Mustang
3. [Redacted For Security Reasons]
4. Get a face tattoo
5. Get a Nevada DL

I won’t take all of your time by going through everything, but just to clarify some things:

I’m super fat, so 120lbs might seem like a lot, but it’s not crazy. 5’10 and 298… Anyway--Most of these have varying levels (Crushed It™, Gold, Silver, Bronze), so it’s not like the world ends if I don’t get exactly what’s on the list. Except the ‘stang. There’s only one level on that one. Anything that’s on the list as a purchase has to be purchased with poker profits. So, there’s that. Last thing about the Crushed It List™: If anyone has an idea on how to prove Miscellaneous 1. I’m all ears.

Finally, a word about that whole family thing.

I could talk for days about this subject, but I’ll try to be brief. Ever since I’ve moved here to Nevada, I’ve heard people talk **** about the schools and some variation of “it’s no place for a family…” I’m pretty sure the people that say that are either smoking crack or haven’t lived very many places. The schools’ ratings are misleading at best. Much of the negatives are the results of the parents, not the school system itself. Yes, it could be better, but the same could be said for literally everywhere else. They talk about homeless and crime (not inclusive)… Vegas is a metropolis. These things are going to be present. We lived in New York City for a stretch. I’ve found that the more you mind your ****ing business, the lower your chances of becoming a victim of crime. Also pistols. Pistols reduce robberies by a factor of at least 1. Now for the big one, sex and vice. There’s a lot of that other places also. Admittedly not as in your face as here, but whatever. I combat that by having honest discussions with my kids. I’m far from dad of the year, but not lying to them is a fast-track to their success.

As for my family and my ambitions, I ran super +EV in the second wife department (who says running it twice doesn’t affect EV??) who believes in me and is 8 years my junior. If any of you have the opportunity to marry out of your league, I highly suggest it. Together we have a 5-year-old son (will be 6 on Valentine’s Day) and I have full custody of my two daughters from that time I got it in bad, ages 12 (in her opinion:22) and 16 (in her opinion:8).

So, there’s my PG&C thread opening. Like I said, I’m planning on updating weekly at a minimum.

Thanks for having me. Stay golden pony boys.

~Havick

Very cool I’m in for once. I’m your age well a tad bit older. Didn’t do the Marine thing as Sgt. JimBob at the recruiting office felt like a hustler and the Marines where hustling me so ended up going to school and getting an engineering degree.

How long have you been in Laughlin? I guessed you lived in Bullhead before so you’re use to those miserable summers.

So what are you doing for school for kids, if there going to school in Bullhead I guess you wait the year out. Does your wife work?

Hey good luck on the goals hope you crush it.

Marine recruiters are the definition of a Hustler, lol. Oddly enough I was disqualified for recruiting duty because I have a tattoo that says "Hustler" above an 8-ball. They send you to a over-specialized school on how to lie. I think it's one that's used by sales people.

Been in Laughlin just over a year. Summers don't really bother me, but my wife doesn't like them-- In fairness she's from upstate NY.

The kids go to Laughlin Highschool/Junior Highschool and Bennet Elementary (all in Laughlin). I much prefer CCSD to Bullhead. There's a ridiculous amount of meth just across that river, there is. LVMPD is phenomenal, and I'm not afraid to say it. Cops in Bullhead don't ever seem to do anything related to police work.

Should be around August that we move up to Vegas, more related to the lease than the school.

My wife has a home-based bakery, she's a food writer, and both of us go to school. She's going for a reason and I'm going because I want to hang a PHD of Mathematics on the wall--with no intent of actually using it.

I used to play out there in Rome at the Turning Stone.

Thanks for the well-wishes.

Ha didn’t think Laughlin had a school district and everyone lived across the River. I need to make it out there, hopefully this summer. My parents use to take me as a kid.

Do you play live anywhere other than Harrah’s or is that really the only game in town?

Awesome OP, I’m in!

Gl on your weight loss goals. One tip I highly recommend is Intermittent Fasting. It only requires some discipline and is super effective for weight loss. I lost 20lbs doing this method in a couple months and my wife lost about 40lbs (and we didn’t follow it to a T). We only ate between 11:30-7:30 and nothing before or after that, just water/coffee (8hrs/16hr split). You can adjust the timeframe to best fit your schedule or adjust the split if you want. Some people start with a 10/14 split and work their way to 8/16.

GL!!

Right now, all of my play is on WSOP. Harrah's occasionally runs a NL500, but it doesn't run regularly. It says it's running on the Bravo app, but every time I've gone up there it's just an interest list.

On the weekends the Riverside has a no-cap 1/2, but I've never seen it.

If someone was in the mood for some 3-6 spread... this would be the best place to be. The only tourists in Laughlin are retirees and California types that couldn't afford a Vegas trip.

Laughlin is in the same school district as Las Vegas. Same police also. I think you have to have seniority to get a post out here as LVMPD.

Bullhead City seems to get worse by the day. Most of the people are retirees, snowbirds, or meth addicts/homeless. Not much in-between and heavy on the last. Used to be able to hang out at the river, but now it's like a campground. Good news though, they plan to put signs up soon.

Thanks for the tip and well wishes.

Intermittent fasting, I think, I'm doing by accident anyway. I switched to Vegan, and I usually get up around 10, eat something... then around 4 I eat again. I don't snack or anything. Oddly enough, the Vegan thing kind of knocked me out of snacking. It's hard af to find something without dairy etc in it. The Vegan thing is sort of an experiment. I did some blood work before I started and will follow that up in about 6 months. Definitely not as hard as I thought it would be. Everyone has their own opinions, though. I'm a new Vegan, so I'm not a douchebag about it yet.

As for coffee, I don't think there's a time of day that I'd be willing to sacrifice for that. I drink that all day and night. DNA nonsense that my wife signed me up for says I'm a "fast metabolizer" of caffeine. Not sure if that's from DNA or experience. Must be a fast beer metabolizer also. Kek.

I told my son to take a nap. He refused. I called Metro. They showed up and arrested him for:


Alright boys, time for the first of (hopefully) many updates to the 2020 Crushed It List™ PG&C Thread. This update covers Jan 1-Jan 7. Welcome back, each and every one of you look just as sexy as the first time I saw you. Except you in the back. Sir—put a shirt on.

Weight Loss, Exercise, Health
1. Lose 120 lbs

Massive progress here, but it was expected. Official weight as of yesterday morning was 279, which was a decrease of 19lbs. 10% in a week? Nice. Alright, before the naysayers and haters arrive, let’s clear a few things up. First of all, yes, that is a massive amount of weight to lose in a week. Technically you could count it as 9 days, since I started the diet (but not exercise) on December 30th. Still seems too high? I feel you.

First, it’s not sustainable (clearly). Second, the reason it’s such a ridiculously high number is because I made DRASTIC lifestyle changes. Me switching to Vegan-and-refined-sugar-free, was about as dramatic of a change you could make. Before the start of the diet, I ate everything in front of me, but had a severe addiction to sugar, dairy, and that sweet, sweet, animal fat. Sometimes I put cheeseburgers on my pizzas and cover them in ranch (that’s not true. I did, however, once eat a cheeseburger with a fried egg on top of the patty with donuts instead of buns). M-O-N-S-T-E-R.
Because the whole Vegan thing has essentially reduced my snacking to—nothing… I’ve reduced my caloric intake down to about 2200. That’s down from around 5k. That’s not a made-up number. Not only did my overall calories plummet, but instead of terrible-kill-you-tomorrow food, there’s actual nutrition in my food.

In addition to the reduction in calories, I’ve been “working out.” Unless you guys actually work out. In which case, I’ve been walking a lot. So far, since the 31st of January, I’ve managed to cover about 90 miles. That’s misleading as hell though. I spent NYE on the strip with my son and we walked from Circus Circus through the entirety of the strip and back. I carried him the on the last push. Combine that with everywhere else I went that day—and we were somewhere around 38k steps, which is a stone’s throw from 20 effing miles. My normal mileage on my morning “workout” walks is between 5-7, and then I add the rest of the day’s steps. They add up hella fast. Do people still say hella? Used to be a thing.

I fully expect the weight loss to start balancing out this week or maybe the next. Should be looking at 2-3lbs a week, yeah? On a side note, I hope to turn my walks into runs in February. “Run” might be misleading. What I mean is, I hope to turn my walks slightly bouncier.

2. 1k Push-ups/day for a week.
Ended the 7th at 45 and today we’re on 50. No missed days. Note to anyone confused by this one: These aren’t consecutive pushups. Currently I’m doing sets of 10. Hopefully by the time I get to 100, those will be sets of 20. The first day was probably the ugliest 10 push-ups ever pushed.

3. 365 Days Tobacco Free
All aboard the fail wagon. Trying again tomorrow.

4. 364/365 Days Vegan
7/7 days here. Easier than I expected. Thanks USMC, for teaching me that you don’t have to particularly enjoy something to eat it!

Writing

1.301 Blog Posts
Behind schedule (4 posts so far) on this one, but still salvageable. Hopefully time management gets better in the coming weeks.

2.1,500 2p2 Posts
Way under-performing here. 17 posts this week. Should have been in the 20s, but should be easily caught up. Part of the reason it was so low is because I’m trying to make actual contributions instead of just replying “this” or “lol” or something stupid like that.

3. 250 Quora Answers
10 this week, but that’s about on pace. This one’s fairly simple, and I need to space them out anyway, because if you were to write a bunch all at once, it wouldn’t keep you at the top of the ‘most viewed’ list.

Poker

1. 1,000 Hours Online

Hey, look at that, the reason we’re all here. This week I had a pretty low volume at 46.5 hours. Would have been more, but last night about 3 hours in, SuddenLink decided that they should shut off all the Internet in my apartment complex.

Despite that little setback, I managed to go 5/7 winning sessions this week, and grind out a massive profit of $38.65. So, I immediately pre-ordered the Ferrari. Biggest winning night was the 1st, with a smooth $14.26. Some of that night was weird, at least 3-4 guys on different tables showed up around 2-3am and just shipped pre until they’d lost about 6-7 buyins. I got a couple of those, so maybe it’s inflated? I don’t know. Playing NL2 is kind of like playing with chimpanzees sometimes, I think. I did have one losing session and still made massive mistakes in a few different spots. Had some run-good in there also. BB/100 for the week was 25.68. I definitely think 35+ is possible, if I could stop being so stupid. I'll post a graph tomorrow, when I update the blog.

I play exclusively on WSOP, so I can’t use your fancy sauce trackers, nerds. I do write down how many hands I’m dealt before I leave the table though, and a ton of other notes. I just can’t give you an accurate fold to 3! or anything like that. WSOP keeps stats on the table that are similar to VPIP, but it includes the blinds also. Anyway, I try to keep my percentage there at 17%-22% sometimes it varies though, as I tend to put more emphasis on range and position than raw VPIP. Definitely not lagging it up though. Which is good, in my opinion, because of the aforementioned chimps.

As for the other challenges, the only one’s I’ve started are Norwegian and chess. I started doing some Duolingo (but think I’m going to ultimately switch to Rosetta Stone), it’s going okay, but I feel dumb. Not particularly used to that (mostly because I stay in my lane). Chess? Yeah, apparently not playing for a couple of years has left me in shambles. I’ve had my ass handed to me by players that were sooooo bad it’s ridiculous. I don’t even know where to start back up. Just keep playing a few games a day I suppose. Current lolrating is 686 but I’m on about a 5 resign streak.

So, we’re still in there, but need to tighten it up in some areas. I’m sure that’ll level out in the coming weeks.

Reason for panic for the week: I seem to have a gray streak in my beard. My wife claims that it’s been there for a while. Asked how she noticed it when she’s supposed to be focusing on my sandwich. Doctor says 2 weeks until I can see out of my left eye again.

Cheers, fellas.

Wait so many questions, don’t know where to begin.

My wife enjoyed your dad joke.

1. I’d take it easy on the attempting to run for a while. With all that extra weight you don’t want to injure yourself, you seem to be doing great. Perhaps first focus on your posture and speed while walking. By posture make a point of walking upright and using your ab muscles and keeping your back straight.

2. That’s 1,000 push-ups in a week, whether they are sets of 2, 10 or a 100?

Even though I’m sure you’re not there yet you should try to do some pull ups. I’m sure you walk through a park with monkey bars or something.

3. What’s your way of getting your tobacco fix, Camel heavies, dip can, both? Have you tried anything to help with this, Chanticleer, etc?

Also it seems like you where on the strip for NYE? Did you play any live cash?

Why are you learning Norwegian? You plan on getting a job on a Norwegian offshore rig in the North Sea? Heck even there they generally speak English. Learn Spanish unless your fluent already.

1. That's a good point. Though I don't think I'm talking about running a marathon out of the gate. More like running/walking intervals at a pace that, in the Marines, we called the "Recon Shuffle." Basically it's like walking at an accelerated pace.

2. 1k pushups in a day, for a week. It doesn't matter if you do 5 at a time, as long as you do 1k in a 24 hour period. Every day. For a week. It's actually more like a forever kind of thing, I chose "for a week" as a metric so I could check it off the list (I couldn't set the goal to be 1k forever or it could never be checked off).

3. I smoke Camel Turkish Reds/Gold. Probably about a pack a day, if my wife's paying attention. Maybe 1.5 if she isn't. That's toned down a lot. When I was driving a truck, I smoked probably 3-4 packs a day. It's easy to burn through them when your driving. At least for me. Not using anything in particular. I have patches, they work pretty well. This is going to sound stupid, but I'm what you'd call "an enabler." Which basically means that if my wife wants to continue smoking one more day, I'm already half way to the store. Part of that's the enabling, and part of it's well--nicotine.

3a. Was definitely on the strip. Didn't play live (not doing that for a couple of months) and despite my adamant and violent protesting, Caesars wouldn't let my 5-year-old sit next to me, and he drinks waaay too much when he's left unattended.

3b. Lol, not planning on going offshore. I'm of Norwegian/English descent and I'm planning on finishing my sleeves and getting some face tattoos all Norse/Odin themed. Also relevant, I'm a Heathen. Of the Asatru variety.

Through my carnales in the Marines (mostly ex-cholos) I picked up Spanish in a conversational sense. I added a ton to that when I drove because I spent a lot of time on loading docks in SoCal.

Jan 1-7 NL2 graph, finally.



Definitely could be better. I've been making some terribad decisions lately.