Well, there is always your hand. It has worn on me and I thought it would bring me down but it hasn't yet to a point that I need to do something about it. I mentioned I was a very strong person in that regard.

Its help that I literally found the most awesome girl ever though. She only thinks of other people when she makes her decisions and always just wants to make me and her friends happy. It's pretty awesome. She's changed me a lot since I've met her. Good changes.

If it comes to the point where it's not fixable, I might have to, but we're still working the kinks out.

<5 =\

Standard indeed. I think there is more than decent chance that I've wound up with the right girl.

But yeah, I'll probably be here 10 years down the line and be giving advice instead of taking it.

I'm a good looking guy, I'm sure I could get laid pretty easily though.

LOL. Bolded statement is epic.

They won't break my relationship up, but I appreciate the kind but maybe slightly demeaning words.

Yeah **** it. Let's change marriage.

Maybe they aren't the best reasons to have kids, but I want to have something I love more than myself. I can't wait to go to my kids little league games or hockey games. Maybe those are the reasons I want them.

It is a bad sign, but w/e I'll deal.

Also, get some viagra! Haha.

Good point.

Your points definitely have an element of truth to them and this leads to the fact that every strategy has its drawbacks. Waiting til at least 30 certainly isn't a panacea. But I think the main problem is when you're in your early 20's it is almost impossible to marry for the right reasons. I don't think your brain is even fully developed emotionally at that age. You can still marry the right girl for the wrong reasons but that would come down to luck.

Also, about the significant personality quirks/flaws and baggage. This to me is a problem at all ages. What I like about divorcees is that they've already failed at least once which means they've probably learned a lot. The naive high hopes and expectations are more likely to be gone now and that's a good thing. They're more likely to have a pragmatic view of marriage which is more healthy given that nothing courts misery and disappointment faster than high expectations.

And lets not forget the fact that a 30ish guy can still get girls in their 20's. This mitigates the issues you brought up, assuming they exist. Also, this isn't necessarily a choice between marriage and tossing her aside. There is a middle ground here too (stay as bf and gf), although this can be taken away by a woman's demands for matrimony at any time.

let's be honest -- the real reason women in their 30s are a pain in the ass is that a large chunk of them are divorced with a child. their awesome new-found pragmatic view of marriage is often offset by having to deal with an ******* of a baby-daddy/ex-hubby, the restraint of having to plan every single damn thing you do around the kid's schedule, and having to wait until the kid's finally ****ing asleep to plow the girl, that's assuming that she isn't so damn tired that she's already fallen asleep and also assuming that the kid doesn't get scared and come busting into the room right when you're ready to nut

LOL I am a pro at the marriage thing. As I have been divorced TWICE. DON'T ****** DO IT!!!!! Marriage is tough and divorce is hell on the bank roll. You only think you have had bad beats in poker till you go to court as a poker player and have them *** with your firnances figuring out child support. If you are a poker player don't get married. Trust me on this one. But I am so happy to see ILP posting the thread was getting boring.

Again, this is not good. For me at least, to consider spending the rest of my life with a woman, she'll have to be awesome in bed, give great head, and scratch my back and my head very often. Those are my physical requirements. I admit they're steep, but I don't mind if they're unattainable since I'm not a traditional marriage guy. But at a bare minimum, a girl should at least put out for you whenever you want. She doesn't have to be a superstar in bed, and she can suck at giving head, and I can forgive her for that for your sake, as long as she makes sure to spread her legs whenever you want. If she can't even meet this bare bones requirement you're in trouble.

She really sounds like a great person. If the physical stuff is fixable, you really may have a winner here. Great personality, makes good money...If you can train her in the bedroom you may have close to the perfect woman.

I just want to point out that the better looking you are, the more likely waiting til you're older to consider marriage is the right strategy. This is because you'll be more likely to still be able to tap nice early/mid 20 something ass in your 30's. When you're not good looking decent age gaps become insurmountable, which is why if I ran into some ugly to average looking guy in his early 20s who luckboxed into dating a superhot chick, I would not be so against him marrying her (assuming the status quo was no longer enough for her). Sometimes boarding a sinking ship is the right strategy.

I read this 3 times and cracked up 3 times (I think it was the last line that got me). Good stuff. The only thing I like about dating girls with kids is it gives me a chance to date a girl who's in a higher class than I can usually get given that the demand for them is relatively lower than for other girls. But yeah, it's a huge hassle as you mentioned. For good looking guys, I would advise never to go this route. No point in going through these hassles if they don't have to.

I was wondering when you would join the discussion since you are the divorce veteran around here. Hopefully Cole will take your words to heart. BTW, I'm secretly hoping you get engaged again years from now so I can have the fun of digging up this ominously wise quote.

your girlfriend is cheating on you.

just sayin

How dare you mock my heat-seeking love missile! Yes it's old and beat up now, but it has served me loyally and well. We've been through a lot of skanky, disease infested trenches together and beaten incredible odds. But there have been costs. Entropy is a bitch. Oh how I envy your youth and vitality!

If this ever happens Cole better let us know. I think we've earned that right.

It's gotten to the point I can't read this thread while I'm playing or it will start to tilt me. I need to wait until after my session.

i hate how "ok ok one more time is fine, just give me 5 minutes" has turned into "sure, one more time is fine, just wake me up in about 4-5 hours"

and yeah, a normal hot chick with a kid is like a nice used german import car that's been in a fender bender. It has a ding on its carfax report, but it will still be a nice drive. But that ding on the carfax report keeps a lot of people away.

But as you said, if you're this super good looking dude, that pretty much means you can go out and get yourself a nice $100k+ ride -- no need to be messing around with used semi-luxury cars.

If I fall for that a third time don't make fun of me... Just hire a hitman and there will be something in the will for you. Save me the burden. A man can only have so many crazy ex wives before death is a better option than life. I'm just saying... <<<<<<DONT GET MARRIED>>>>>> Just remember a "Woman marries a man thinking she can change him and she CAN'T, A man marries a woman thinking she won't change and she WILL"

Don't listen to all these guys. I've been with the same woman since I was 20. No, we can't get married and you have no clue how much I wish we could. All you jerks don't know how good you have it. If you found the right person, awesome. My g/f and I went through a rough period a few years ago but we worked things out. I wouldn't change anything. Things won't always be perfect for you and your g/f, but at the risk of sounding cliche....what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger.

you guys don't count

This is the one area where Muslims got it right!

Cause we're awesome?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7rEP0on8FE

On my way out the door, watched first 5 seconds, can't wait to see the rest

well obv


but seriously, girl-girl is just a different dynamic than guy-girl


i can't prove it, and i might be wrong, i just feel that there are different forces at work with a guy-girl relationship


i'm not saying your relationship is easy, or it's not a real one, it's just different, because it's two girls



anyone want to help me out here, or am i just being ******ed

imo

this is the gaming chair they sent me.


it's actually pretty nice. has speakers in the top, so I can plug the audio plugs from the xbox into it


it also has a headphone jack, so now i can play Rock band at 3am and the only sounds ppl might here are a light tapping.



my mom called today and said i got another package. it's a gift basket with food and candy and awesomeness.


i just want to thank all of you for your credits for cash dollars going to support AP trying to get me back on the site.

probably

It's not about the lack of sexual gratification. It's about the feeling of rejection.

The problem is that by the time you "need" to do something about it, you'll be miserable.

Putting up with a girl's issues isn't being strong. It's you taking the easy way out.

Yeah, me too. Ask me how that worked out.

You might have something to work with here.

Very true. This is stuff you need to figure out on your own. Nobody gave me this advice when I was in your shoes. But if they did, I never would have taken it.

ygos?

My advice is get her in line while you have the upper hand. Let her know you're serious about breaking-up if she can't fix her issues. It's either going to be tough now or really tough later. You decide.