i just want to filter for when i am effectively all-in preflop, no matter who made the last call or raise
i can't figure it out, what am i overlooking?

That's not going to be possible - you can filter for times you actually raised all-in (ie- for all of your chips) on the Actions -> Preflop tab (Raise All-in) but this doesn't take into account raising more than the effective stack.

The reason we can't do this is that the effective stack size as stored in the database from before the flop is just the size of the smallest stack. So if you have 9 players, 8 of which have different stack sizes from 50BB to 150BB and one guy UTG+1 with 2BB, 2BB will be stored as the effective stack size. So if he folds later on there's no real way to tell if you've raised more than the other opponent's stack.