So heres the thing, I took about a year from going to the various boats here in the midwest to focus on my biz, finishing school, and to work in a mental hospital for a while. During that year ive been quietly putting money away for a comeback tour. Horseshoe seems to be the best action that is nearby for me (2 hour drive) so me and my boy head up there for some debotchery and such. I bring along 3 grand figuring that should be enough for a day trip and hell I prolly wont hit up more than 1-2 NL anyhow.

The trip is fast as we push 80 the whole way and arrive just past 2pm. The place smells the same its nearly intoxicating to a couple of young degenerates. We make the long walk hoping to see an offering plate somewhere along the trip to drop in a buck or two for charity (karma baby one time). Alas, there is no plate and we creep down the escalators to our home for the next 12 hours or so.

The casino floor is a buzz as usual and as ritual dictates we head over to the high limit slot area to throw 20 bucks each into a 5 dollar slot. We hit nothing and head down to the poker room.

The poker room at the shoe is pretty nice, hell it is Indiana not vegas. The tables are packed and we jump on a 1-2 list and only I add myself to the 1-2 pot limit omaha list. After about 20 minutes we get our seats at the same "new" table 1-2 no limit that just opened up. I grind for about an hour with nothing special to report and am up about 120 when the lady in the box calls for the 1-2 pot limit players to make their way to the high limit area.

I bring my 420 over and realize its 100-500 buy in game and everyone has max...I head over to the cage and get another grand in green and black. The game starts and everyone agrees to make it a 3 blind game 1-2-5 with the 5 being a button straddle. Its amazing how this little decision makes the game play so so so much higher than just 1-2. Every pot was 25-125 preflop and the action was fast and serious. I folded mostly eventually hitting a flush on a draw heavy board and pocketing about 300 on the pot. Much like Mike mcD then I made a score...I get AKAsT on the straddle button. The action goes call call pot call and its up to me. I make it 110 to go and get 4 callers...its a hell of a game ill tell ya! Flop comes: T 4 3 and checks over to me. I have about 700 in front of me and with over 450 in middle I really would like to just take it down here so I fire pot bet out and push all my red stacks out there nice and neat. Muck, Muck, tank for 2 minutes (please fold, well please call? I dont know but either works at that point)...Muck...SWEET!

I continue to play small ball only getting involved in big calls preflop with premium hands and at about 8pm im at 2400 on the table. My boy and I decide to take a break and walk around for a bit. I head over to the nickle slots and donk off a couple hundred chasing bonus's that never hit. He heads back to his 1-2 game up about 400 at that point and I leave my chips at plo to wander upstairs for some craps.

I have always been a dont's player and walk up and fire 500 no 10 on my first roll and on the come out throw a 6-4. Not good...im the kinda guy if I get stuck I fight to get it back...sometimes to a terrible end. I donk a total of 2gs on craps when a guy decides to hit a 4 in a row fire bet while im all over the dont pass with odds...sigh....

I have 200 in my pocket and the chips at plo only...not good. I go down to plo and play a few more hands, really about 2 rotations and donk call about 400 in bad calls to leave the table with 2,000 total. So I do a count and have 2200 total down 800 on the trip. This must not stand! We head up to roulette and decide that I should swing for 400 on the first spin and if I hit im back in business. I throw 400 total out on 15 numbers and miss. Next spin I lost 400 more and we walk away me tilted like an upside down midget in a pig costume dangling from a tree as a mexican kid hits him with a bat mistaking it for his pinhatta.

I slot it up a bit more and when I finally break and do a count I have 700 bucks left...WTF I tell my boy and we go eat at Legends after I get a $60.00 comp from my epic play.

Dinner: We have filet mignon and loaded potatoes...damn good food I must say, my boy even takes a picture of it to post on his facebook to show its amazingly hot pink center (bud um bum bum). So we discuss the options, do I leave down 2300 and full or take a shot at redemption...well any hero tale would not be complete with eat and run so I decide to head back into the pit of darkness to see if I can redeem myself.

Phase II coming...comment, question, berate etc as you will..phase II by end of day.

I like the first portion of TR. Keep it coming...


Should never get into the table games or the slots... it will break you sooner or later....

Good Luck OP.

what in the hell do you think this is, the indiana lifestyle forum?

Good TR. I sometimes Love unapologetic Degeneracy.

Stay away from the table games.

The "Tilting Like a Midget" line was a miss, but still enjoying the read.

You don't have to be in Vegas to live a Vegas Lifestyle.

Phase II...sorry for the delay but i was busy removing the anal beads from my rectum. Anyhow back to the business of doing degen. We finish our steaks and taters and arrive at the entrance again...I feel dispair but also a hint of excitement for now I truly have to do well or go busto...Ive always kinda had this thing that if I get stuck even 100 or 200 I must get it back..its cost me about 250,000 dollars over my last 10 years or so and many other things in life but it simply my leak ive come to believe.

With 700 in hand and a fist full of determination we head to roulette the "best" spot to turn 700 into 3gs right right? I throw 200 on the layout on my 15 numbers and hit my heavyiest bet of 20 straight up on 27 (my fav number)...700 boom! the 700 on the felt and 500 in pocket puts me at 1200 and I am eager for the next spin..I toss out 400 on the layout praying to hit one of my 15...it hits 10 which is right by 27 and 00 where my heaviest money lies...I have 25 on the 10 which ships me 875 and +475 spin... Next spin I only put out 100 and 00 comes up with only 5 on it...GOD WHY...

We leave roulettte and im sitting on 2,100 dollars...a 900 loss and feeling like I can get there...My buddy suggest lets hit the high stakes slot area again...I agree not wanting to play but ill watch him for a bit degen it up...as he blows 900 on a 5 dollar slot thats tighter than my mom was before i penetrated her....I mosey into the high limit black jack and craps area...I pull out 400 and buy into the 50 a hand table where its me and the pretty dealer only!

I play 7 hands total...and win...

7 Hands in a row with bets varying from 50-350 (had a split and double on that one)

I leave black jack without losing a hand and after cashing in I do a count and im at 3400! I go to tell my buddy and he looks terrible as the asian hooker next to him is chatting him up in black stockings and a short dresss. He dumped all 900 into the slot (his whole roll that he brought up). Hes talking to her for about 10 minutes and finally she says do you have a room, he plays along asking how much she says 300 an hour or 2500 for the night...He looks to me with the can you throw me 300 loan and I give him the quick head shake no...we leave me elated to be back on top and him distraught with no monies, no hookers, and clearly no blow. it's pretty unfortunate, because i would have loved for her to take a nice big dump right on my chest.

March is Midwest Regionals and we plan on hitting it hard with first 230 and 340 buy in tourneys on our agenda on March 11th and 12th...We both have set aside 3500 each for the trip and his mission to find the asian hooker is clearly on the list.

TR coming in March once we own the regionals.

Hope you liked it and i'd like to sincerely apologize for posting this non-vegas trip report in the las vegas forum.

Er, Elizabeth is the Las Vegas of southern Indiana?

Well, I'm from Detroit. We're like the Las Vegas of... well, Detroit. So I may tend to have a bit of a "Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder" point of view.

Whatever that means.

Whatever....

I feel like I just got robed.

No hooker, no blow, and not even exciting....

Augie, i was wondering how you were going to handle your appearance in Phase II. Well played sir. Absolutely perfect. LOL.

$3500 for a Hoosier Asian Hooker? Get pics, I don't think there's one hot enough around here.

wow man...that's some pretty sick stuff there in part 2. anal beads? wanting an asian hooker to take a dump on your chest? sex with your own mother? dude, TMI?

LOL Augie. Who wants a Hollywood at Penn National in Grantville, PA trip report next?

You won't even float "your boy" 3 hundo for the hooker after that comeback...talk about missing the karma boat. The hooker Gods would have surely given you run good for the rest of the night.

Awesome.

Don't pick an eFight with a Mod.

Then what happened?

I think he spent a year at the Olympics before going to Vegas with $3k to save money, right?

This is weak where is MooreMan, at least he uses his human mind