Situations where poker speak is NOT appropriate?! - Page 4 - Poker News

Two Plus Two Forums Poker News & Discussion News, Views, and Gossip

Situations where poker speak is NOT appropriate?!

Post Reply Subscribe

...

Page 4 of 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Page 4 of 10

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

07-12-2010 , 12:40 AM

#76

idmtchris

adept

Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 1,036

Calling a door to door salesmen or telemarketer a cold caller

Quote

07-12-2010 , 12:47 AM

#77

DoctorFarha

veteran

Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 2,596

i know this is a terrible pun but:
old men running = limp raise

Quote

07-12-2010 , 01:13 AM

#78

apokerplayer

adept

Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,044

At an autopsy: "This table is dead."

Quote

07-12-2010 , 01:17 AM

#79

apokerplayer

adept

Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,044

A bit awkward at a Mexican donkey show: "LOL. Donkaments."

Quote

07-12-2010 , 01:20 AM

#80

apokerplayer

adept

Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,044

After committing a hate crime against a transvestite down by the docks: "I just hit a queen on the river."

Quote

07-12-2010 , 01:21 AM

#81

jonwies

old hand

Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 1,245

Quote:

Originally Posted by litlebullet

? lol sounds funny but not sure why it is funny.

I'm guessing it has something to do with life --> wife

Quote

07-12-2010 , 01:23 AM

#82

apokerplayer

adept

Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,044

After a fellow soldier is blown up right beside you by an improvised explosive device, despite being a much better soldier than you, and you are left unharmed: "I'd rather be lucky than good."

Quote

07-12-2010 , 01:26 AM

#83

apokerplayer

adept

Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 1,044

Inquiring of a hooker her price: "What's your average win rate?"

Quote

07-12-2010 , 02:53 AM

#84

ashipsomewhere

old hand

Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 1,282

Quote:

Originally Posted by Actionjunkie

Online dating...bum hunting?

nah this is a winner!!

Quote

07-12-2010 , 03:04 AM

#85

assjack1

newbie

Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 38

When your girlfriend is giving your newborn child all the attention. Say to the kid "we'll see if your even around in 5 years".

Quote

07-12-2010 , 03:08 AM

#86

jakkedup

centurion

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 189

Shoving it in with a medium pair following a limp raise, flopping the nuts only to get sucked out in the end.

Quote

07-12-2010 , 03:25 AM

#87

medonkyou

old hand

Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 1,206

Quote:

Originally Posted by jakkedup

Shoving it in with a medium pair following a limp raise, flopping the nuts only to get sucked out in the end.

obv winner

Spoiler:

Quote

07-12-2010 , 03:41 AM

#88

pha7Ngoo

journeyman

Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 336

Quote:

Originally Posted by inthepub5

reffering to a disabled person as a "limper"

This is hilarious when you think about how many people in poker are conditioned to "punish limpers"

Quote

07-12-2010 , 04:23 AM

#89

macthemost

banned

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 521

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jabba021;20139:031

Asking Hal Lubarsky to post blind.

yesssssss

Quote

07-12-2010 , 04:29 AM

#90

maglame

old hand

Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 1,287

Hitting on a girl with the line "one time!"

Quote

07-12-2010 , 04:42 AM

#91

TourneyDonk

journeyman

Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 253

This doesn't answer the OP exactly but was a foot in mouth moment caused by pokerspeak. I was in a live tourney and a guy at my table lost a big all in and barely had any chips left. I told him 'chip and a chair' and immediately after I said that I noticed he was sitting in a wheelchair.

Quote

07-12-2010 , 06:09 AM

#92

assjack1

newbie

Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 38

Quote:

Something similar happened to me, i was playing 3 handed in a live tourney and i had a tough decision, i look over at the guy and i say, "wow your shaking like crazy, you must have a big hand". I got told later that he has parkinsons.

Quote

07-12-2010 , 10:34 AM

#93

timchuk

old hand

Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 1,523

Im gonna punish the limpers in position while i show jack King off

Quote

07-12-2010 , 11:43 AM

#94

JohnnyX

grinder

Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 573

Watching p0rn, betting the over/under on the time of the money shot =
"betting on the come"

Quote

07-12-2010 , 11:50 AM

#95

JohnnyX

grinder

Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 573

Referring to pimps as "suited 'connectors'"

Quote

07-12-2010 , 12:05 PM

#96

Conz

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jul 2009 Posts: 6,919

Quote:

Originally Posted by TourneyDonk

lol i was palying at a table, and for some reason i said to the kid next to me "if our table just started fighting that one, you think we'd win?" he says "everyone at that table can probably kick my ass" immediately a guy rolls out from the other side of the table in a motorized chair, and his left arm is paralyzed. I lookeed at him trying not to laugh, he says "I stand by my previous comment" i laughed