It is now officially Masters week!!!!!!

I want a book about modern golf history. Not a how to but a history. Ideas?

Make a random observation. Let BO correct you. Lather rinse repeat.

Here's how the casual golf fan probably views the last 27 years of golf:

"In 1986 Jack Nicolas won his 18th green jacket by birdying the last 12 holes of Amen Corner at The Masters. When asked if his green jacket was the right size, he famously said "It is." The guy who played one of the Bob's from Office Space said "Yes Sirrrr!" when Jack rolled in an albatross putt on a par 3 hole.

In the late 90s, South Africa's Nick Faldo was pretty good and won a bunch of tournaments.

In 1992, Freddie Couples won his third straight Masters, a feat that has never been done. This win put Fred into the Hall of Fame.

Throughout the 80s and 90s Greg Norman was really bad at golf and lost a lot of tournaments by being bad at golf. He gave tournies away to Jack Nicholson and Nick Faldo, one of which was the French Open. Greg Norman retired in shame and I think he's broke and penniless now. He was the #1 golfer in the world back when the formula was still in beta.

Seve Ballesteros, Mexico's elite golfer, would win tournaments by hitting balls off of concrete. If he missed a green he would have the Marshall lay down a 4x4 precast concrete pad like you would see your air conditioner rest on. He would then drop the ball on the concrete pad and play it as it lay.

Ernie Els came along in the '90s and I think he still plays. He won a bunch of tournaments in Africa then came to America and won a US Open with a red and white shirt on I think. He's really tall and has a nice swing. He's a distant uncle of Oscar Pistorious.

Philbert Mickelson came along in the '90s as a teenage phenom. He had good hair and smiled a lot and everybody loves him. One of the most genuine players in the game, Phil would go on to win his first major at age 23 or so. He was so dominant and left-handed. He gained weight as quickly as he accumulated majors. By 2000 he had won several majors and was the #1 ranked player in the world.

In the late '90s, a prophet named Tiger Woods came along. He won the 1997 Masters by 23 strokes, and Fuzzy Zoeller said "That (slur) better not eat no fried chicken or watermelon. I really hate (slur)s. Anyone got a 2iron they don't want anymore?"

Tiger would go on to be the best player of all-time, trouncing Jack Nicklaus' overall win total and majors win percentage. Only a few naysayers would remain as of 2013. Tiger won the 2008 US Open on two broken femurs. He sunk a putt from 64 feet to bring Rocco Mediate to his knees.

Around 2000, Sergio Garcia, Seve's son, came along and won a few majors right off the bat then never did anything else.

Vijay Singh was an old guy from India or somewhere who snorted deer to gain a competitive advantage. He won like 17 tournies in 2 years and for a moment overtook GOATer as world number one. Vijay has 8 majors. The fourth most in the modern era.

In 2009, Elin Nordegren caught Tiger Woods banging an Applebee's waitress on top of their two kids. She got mad and chased Tiger with a watermelon. Yadda yadda yadda, Tiger dropped in the rankings and haterz beat peen.

In 2011, the belly putter was invented and some jackwagons started actually winning majors with it. This forced Arnold Palmer to use his illuminati power to get the R&A to abolish the rule.

Roy McEvoy came out from Northern Iceland and has won a couple majors in just a few years. He has curly hair and dates a female tennis player.

And this...has been Modern Golf History.

:thumbup:

Kuchar walks off the green after a birdie like a boss. Priceless.

A+ effort by A-R'sC

in b4

"Greg Norman retired in shame and I think he's broke and penniless now. He was the #1 golfer in the world back when the formula was still in beta."

criminally funny

lol Furyk

phb

Rory back from the dead!

C'mon Rory. If a Eurotard breaks the "USA! USA! USA! #1" streak I hope it's him and not Laids.

RORYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

1 back with 2 to play.

Too bad only majors matter.

If KJ Choi won a major I'd be so happy for him.

Welp, gg. Laird probably just won.

laird probably just sealed it with that putt. 8 birds on the day. he deserves it.

Ridic round

Yeah, Laird's no pussy that's for sure.

A bogey-free, 9 birdie round, with birdies on 16/17/18. JFC.

I'm not too happy right now but props to Laird

Rory McIlroy....almost the best of the b-team.

Shut up. Cary Middlecoff or any of his contemporaries would have shot at least 12 under with an eagle on 18 just so they could feed their families.

This isn't even a major so none of it counts anyway.