4/17/16

1-arm bentover row 38x13x4
1-leg DL 38x10x4
lat pushdown w/ resistance bands 12x5
bentover row 66x9x4
lat pulldown w/ resistance bands 14x4
rear delt raise 8x15x4
seated row w/ resistance bands 13x4

4/18/16

Ahnold press 23x10x4
hammer curl 23x8x4
pushup 15x5
chinup 5x5
lateral raise 18x6x4
tricep pushdown w/ resistance bands 12x4
front raise 13x5x4

Tomorrow is pistol day.

When do you expect to hear about the job?

they said sometime this week.

Good luck.....again..!

4/19/16

140.6 lbs today. Took me 3 weeks to get back to 140. F U depression.

Pistol progress is going slow. I can hold the bottom position for about 13-14 seconds each side. Quads too weak, ankles too stiff.

Did some cooking today. Made a ton of rice and veggies for the rest of the week.

Boom, grats on 140 again.

Do you have a plan to ease yourself into going to a gym? Dbs and Bw exercises at home can only take you so far.

You seem like you're pretty motivated and could make some nice gains if you had some proper equipment.

Step 1 of any plan involving going to a gym would need to be getting a job because I'm busto right now.

I think I'm fine doing what I'm doing for now tho. Maybe if I really hit a plateau I'll think about doing barbell/machine stuff at a gym.

4/20/16

db squat 46x14x5
db deadlift 46x15x5
1-leg calf raise 56x15x4
1-leg kickback 38x15x4
side plank 32 seconds x4
knee hugs 25x1

Ate nothin but fish, veggies, rice, and proton shakes. Cleeeeen.

4/21/16

lying leg raise 25x2
wood chopper 20x3
knee hugs 25x3
ab rolls 12x2

Starting to get really bummed out about this job that I don't think I'm going to get. I did the best I possibly could have at the interview/stage and I still can't get the ****ing job. WTF do I do now? My net worth is roughly $400. I wake up every day with nothing to do and no one to do anything with.

I think this will be the last abs-only day. I feel like I need to do more compound exercises each day and my abs are probably the area I've made the most strength gains anyway. I'll try a 3 day split 2x/week starting tomorrow. Unless I'm crushed by depression and hopelessness, in which case I'll probably spend the day watching russian car crash videos on YT. **** life **** me **** the world

Interview for more jobs, no one gets every job they interview for. It doesn't mean you won't succeed in the next one.

depression kicking my ass again. Ate refined carbs and turkey bacon yeserday. Watched season 4 of Reno 911 instead of car crash videos. Stomach ****ed up from all the sugar.

Woke up today with no energy or reason to get out of bed. Goal today is to take a shower and eat some real food.

It's hard to keep a consistent training schedule when you want to die about 5 days per month.

I slept well last night, ate some pizza so hopefully didn't lose too much weight. Will try to climb back on the wagon today.

I'd suggest making use of association to do the things in your life that suck / are hard / are not fun / etc. In this case, perhaps it would be easier to train if you knew you were gonna have a nice meal or play a video game afterward. For me, I generally train on days that I play live poker, because even though I hate training, I find playing live to be pretty relaxing and fun. And I don't train on days that I play online poker, because online poker stresses me out. I'm also tending to have my cheatiest meals of the week post-workout. I don't really subscribe to the bro-science about meal timing, I just look forward to training days because they're also the days that I get to crush fajitas or have a cheeseburger or something.

This is all perfectly logical. The problem is that when I'm depressed, the first thing that happens is I lose all my energy, there's nothing that will motivate me to lift in that state. Sometimes I don't even want to eat or have the energy to get up and go to the kitchen, like the previous episode when I lost 5 lbs in 5 days. This time it was shorter and I just tried to keep eating so I don't lose weight.

Fortunately there was pizza last night so I ate some. Woke up today feeling better. I looked at myself in the mirror and screamed ffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuukkkkkkkkk youuuuuuuuuuuuuu depressionnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!!

4/24/16

Weighed in at 143.2 lbs, my heaviest ever. Pizza is an amazing thing.

I'm going to start doing a 3-day split of back+bis, chest+tris, legs+abs.

chinup 6x4
bentover db row 66x12x4
1-leg db dl 38x11x4
1-arm bentover row 38x13x4
lat pushdown w/ bands 13x4
rear delt raise 13x9x3 (hurt my left rear delt on the last set)
1-arm lat pulldown w/ bands 15x4
seated row w/ bands 13x4
hammer curl 23x11x4

I applied for a job at a cookie place today. I doubt I would learn much there but it's within walking distance and it's a job.

^Insomnia Cookies?

No it's a place that does mostly wholesale, I think they sell at Whole Foods. They just replied this morning and I got an interview for wednesday.

I've seen some posts on cl for Insomnia cookies. They offer 8.50/hr and the bakers also have to work the front counter so lol @ that bull****.

4/25/16

arnold press 23x12x4
pushup 18x4
chest roll 12x4 (like a fly but using ab rollers)
lateral raise 18x6x4
tricep pushdown w/ bands 12x4

I've decided my aesthetic goal is to look like Djokovic (ignore the face obv)

thats a reasonable goal.

damn he has more muscle mass than i thought. that's the life of an ectomorph, look like a skinny pos with clothes on, but once they come off all the beetches want you hehe

Probably his training just involves a lot of work in entirely different metabolic regions than would facilitate significant mass gain, as would make sense for tennis.

4/26/16

took the day off. Didn't sleep well and I was more sore than usual. Also wanted to get some sleep for job interview at cookie place.

4/27/16

Didn't sleep much again. Job interview was about 20 minutes of the owner telling me how anal, demanding, and mentally unstable she is. In her defense, it was the most spotless and organized professional kitchen I've ever seen. They use a 60 quart mixer, which is bigger than anything I've ever used. Most of the business is wholesale. She sells these cookies at Whole Foods. Big time stuff. She asked me if I'm capable of lifting 50 lbs lol. I'm going back friday to work a few hours to see if I'm worthy of making her holy vegan cookies. She said there will be a stopwatch involved. She told me I would be required to sign a confidentiality agreement for the recipes. She told a story about how she purposely left expired eggs in the cooler to see how long one of her employees would take to find it (3 weeks). Red flags everywhere, but I need a job.

Got home feeling tired AF but forced out a few sets.

db squat 56x12x4
db dl 56x13x4
1-leg calf raise 56x12x2
knee hugs 30x2

Job sounds like it will make for some good stories. Good luck!

4/28/16

Even more tired than the day before. Did nothing. Stage at cookie place got cancelled because I'm allergic to peanuts and the lady said they make so many cookies with peanuts that I wouldn't be able to avoid working with peanuts. ****ing stupid peanuts **** you

Lol a baker allergic to peanuts? Gl with that

IKR, brilliant career choice.

I can pretty much only work in a euro style place because euros don't like peanuts.