Sat 5/23 log:

My sleep is stabalizing and I didn't go into a deep manic episode.....woo hoo!
17 straight days with no nights less than 6hrs.

Sun 5/24 workout:
It's raining today so I decided to go to the gym and lift weights for the first time in a year.

I even jogged for 3 mins@6mph, 1 min at a time during my warmup walk.

Squat: 3x65lbs
Deadlift: 2x5x135lb, 1x3x135lbs

I was sweating and out of breath the whole time....it felt great.
Got my heart rate higher than swimming, but still haven't managed to get into the cardio zone.

https://youtu.be/eAbdw4tWQtM

https://youtu.be/8C_DZjMb69Q

My God I have gained so much freaking fat in my stomach over the past two years. I haven't looked at my YouTube videos in so long to see what I used to look like, I should have.

I'm always pretty confused by your cardio graphs. I have no idea what is safe or healthy or whatever for you, but if I recall you have surprisingly good heart condition/etc, and we are approximately the same age. When I do 20-45 min of cardo I generally average ~150bpm, which is about 20% higher than your average. Assuming it's safe to do so, it would seem (but I don't know **** about swimming) that you're just not trying all that hard while swimming?

I feel like I'm trying hard lol, I dunno what the deal is.
When I get to a 25m pool I can check my times against heart rate. Now it's looking like I have pretty good time/lap, but as Melk pointed out it's not that accurate due to the short distance of the pool.

I do have excellent cardio health. I forgot what the heart test was called I was sent to take on the treadmill, but I scored really well. The doc said I had the heart of a 20something athlete.

Do you have the heart of an ABP?

Lol

Sun 5/24 log:

Mon 5/25 log:

I could hardly move yesterday and today is even worse. It hurts so bad to sit and pee.
Everything is sore, even my ribs.

I tried to mow and gave up after 10mins.

Those are the aftereffects of drinking 1500 cal of Dr Pepper. Checks out.

1500 cal of Dr pepper??? Is that some typo?

But an aside, it's truly shocking anyone "trying" to lose weight drinks any calories whatsoever. Cant understand why it's so unbearable to drink diet drinks. Like maybe it takes a bit to get used to it, but I strongly prefer DC to coke even if coke magically had 0 cals.

I have been drinking diet. I ran out and was just craving sugar like crazy yesterday, I just needed something sweet. I didn't eat until around 10pm and just drank soda all day. My hormones are jacking with me and I've been really bitchy today.
I'm also a couple days late and I always get a lil more bitchy/crave sweets when my cycle changes.

Wow, I legit thought it was a typo and was only one soda.

Good luck moving forward, you gotta figure out a way to stymie cravings tho.

Good job logging tho.

Ten Dr peppers? How is that even possible..

Sugar = inflammation ldo

+1 on gj logging it despite that being pretty absurd!
That would have been an awesome day of fasting otherwise if those were DDPs instead!

Diet drinks are cheat code and also mandatory! I'd prob be overweight if they didn't exist.

Somehow I did not know and it never occurred to me that sugar causes inflammation. This would also explain the overnight weight increase of 8lbs.

I'm gonna chug water tomorrow and get in the pool while it's still cold in the morning. Every fiber of my body is sore.
Code3 is gonna have to start helping off the toilet until I can move again.....he will for sure start hiding his Dr. Pepper and sweets from me after this.

10 Dr. Peppers I don't even.

I just interviewed for a job where the pay is $16k less than what I was making.
It's in a remote backwoods East Texas location, I'm a great fit for the position and they aren't going to find anyone else with the experience and skills in this location. I will probably get called for a second interview and it's a high probability I'll get an offer.
I'm not sure if I should go for this job just to have income, get my PE and bounce as soon a something better opens up in the area with higher pay or just wait it out since I'll be fine for another year without a job.

I'm also still speaking with the owner of this other company, but that situation is weird and he doesn't want to commit to someone without a trial contract period.

Tues 5/26 log:

Eat a peach.

I can eat a peach for hours.

I think it’s important to examine your own behavior here. You “needed” something sweet - no you didn’t need it, it was a compulsive itch that wanted to be scratched.

Think about on the surface how ridic this sounds:

“I need something sweet, so I am going to drink 10 dr. Peppers today.”

This isn’t rational. When you can start denying these compulsions, the weight will fly off. And it gets easier over time. I have the same issue but with cigarette smoking.