It's not odd, it's not a coincidence, you're absolutely right to suspect something may be going on(something may not be also and she's testing you to see how you respond).

You're still being unreasonable though. How old are you, how old is she, what are you looking for out of this relationship, why do you think you should have exclusive rights over someone that you are broken up with?

Ok so this is how she revealed it. Let me preface it by saying I have no right to be mad that she slept with him if she did. We were broken up at the time. I just came from a marriage where there was nothing but lies on my ex wife's part so I readily admit I have trust issues. I just don't want to invest in a relationship if there is no trust. I'm not sure I believe her.

I set up a date a couple days before we got back together. The date was literally 10 hours away when we decided to try to work it out. I didn't want to hide it so I told her about the date and that I didn't want to be rude and cancel it last second because the girl was coming from Denver and the trip had already been paid for. I assured her nothing was going to happen. It was a river rafting trip on the Arkansas river. She said she wasn't going to enjoy me going on it but she understood and apprieciated my honesty. She then said since we are being fully transparent a guy friend of mine stayed the night here but nothing happen. He was having marriage troubles and needed a place to crash.

I let it go but then he texted her asking her if she wanted to hang out a couple days later and it caused me to question it again. She got very defensive and said she was disappointed I didn't trust her. This guy friend has been firends with her for 20 years and she says they had sex once 20 years ago but haven't had any since. She doesn't understand whats weird about a guy staying at her house who is married. I think it's at the very least "odd" that she's the first person he runs to when he has an issue with his wife.

Ok, so here's what you might want to consider before you just dive right back into another relationship like the last one you just got out of. Let's take an objective look at this whole situation.

For starters, you answered 1 of 4 of my questions which I think are all fairly relevant to the issue. That said I can guess you're in your 40/50s and she's in her late 30's or early 40's based off what you said about her only sleeping with the guy once 20 years ago. You also didn't state what you want out of this relationship...however, lets move on.

You recently ended a relationship that involved trust issues with your ex wife. You now enter into a 4 month relationship with a woman that you haven't ever actually stated if it was monogamous/exclusive for any period of time, and if it was who brought this up?

Let's just assume it was exclusive before the break bc if not then you have no merit for being upset anyway. Do you see any issue with being in an exclusive relationship you can't even make it 4 months in without needing a 2 week break? Now, you proceed to take this break and schedule a date with another woman. You decide it's best to tell this woman you've been dating about this other girl you're getting ready to go on a date with as you attempt to dive back into exclusivity with a woman you couldn't even make it 4 months with, after this 1 date where nothing will happen. Are you seeing any flaws in this strategy and how it might just be destined for failure?

So you tell her and make her feel a certain way about what you're doing, there's very very few women that are going to leave this unchecked. She now turns around and throws it back in your face to see how you will feel when confronted with the same scenario and your emotions overtake you and you fold like a cheap suit, despite logically understanding you have no right to be upset or feel jealous. You ignore all this, let your emotions run wild, and continue projecting your own insecurities from your last relationship onto this girl in a situation you have no right to do so.

Meanwhile, you're still looking to work it out and continue things with a woman that is cool having a guy that's married sleep at her place. Do you think this woman would feel OK telling this guys wife about any of this? Do you see any conflict in dating a woman that is OK will potentially creating the same trust issues you had in your marriage, in another persons marriage?

You're basically setting yourself up to repeat a cycle of relationships where women do as they please and walk all over you. Even if they don't intend to from the start, if you're projecting your own trust issues onto them you will force them into a position where they don't/can't find you and you're insecurity attractive and either break up with you or cheat on you.

Do you need to build trust with this woman or are you strong enough as a man to have fun with this one and take a pass on anything long term and build trust with someone that has the same values as you? Do you feel like you need to be in a relationship or you're not secure in who you are? These are the types of questions you should be asking yourself bc from my albeit limited perspective, you seem to be incredibly insecure in yourself and projecting that onto the women in your life, which will just perpetuate a cycle of more of the same in all your relationships.

Damn,I got to admit,that was good, Lucid.

Thanks Lucid. I needed that. I did fall for it didn't i. I still don't think she slept with him but I'm not going to worry about because if she did it will come out. She's never lied to me in the past 4 months that I know of so she deserves the benefit of the doubt. I don't know why I do this because I attracted this girl partially with my confidence and then when I start catching feelings my confidence goes out the window.

If I would have acted like it didn't bother me at all it would have turned that situation completely around.


We're both 39 btw and we were exclusive for 3 months before we broke up. I was single for a year before I met her and I was fine with it. I mean I was dating and maybe in sort of another relationship for about 3 months but I'm fine single. Not scared of it at all really.

Did it when I was 25-26. 25 is pretty much the GOAT age to do it, esp for pulling the 21 year olds.

Yeah my main regret in life is not backpacking Europe while I was single.

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Started speaking to a 23 yo bulgarian chick off tinder yesterday. texted for a few hours then went to bed. texted her today asking whats up, just as i was about to finish work.

She told me shes literally 5 mins away from where i work and she lives 10 mins from there. She suggested I meet with her after work for a chat and i should walk her home but I couldnt come in, thought there was a good chance i would get some action if she liked my personality so i obliged. Met up with her and she looked even better in person, big titts around 5'3 and nice body.

Talked about various things while walking with her then we got to her house door and she looked at me and smiled saying " i told you, you cant come in" I just smiled back and said all i want is a drink, she smiled and we made our way inside. She led me into her room and within seconds we were already making out, she gave me head which was quite good, deep throat etc then i ****ed her missionary then doggy, went back to missionary then came on her belly. got dressed then made my way home

they say i be killin it, i say i be killin her

nice mike

And you didn't come in,how gentlemanly of you

lol this didnt get enough love imo

^ jfc lol


We dropped the ball on any meet ups this year but HardSummer at the end of this month seems like the move. Idk his screen name but the guy I hungout with on NYE in San Diego is going, eckenz' friend who I drove down with last year is going again (eckenz is having a baby idk if he cares I post that), JoeIngram might be coming, and I have a guy from my Twitter in so cal going too. So ya if you're around or want to fly in it should be solid. Ontario, Ca airport is 10miles from the venue

Tinder def not dead











Ended up introducing that girl to her first anal hehe
Do you guys ever go bareback with girls off tinder/nightclubs ? Always reluctant with this kind of stuff, eventho it sucks to wrap it before

****ing legend cold10bet lmao, whats your std opening line strat?

"Hey babe, wanna come to my place, it's a pokestop"

No seriously, most of the time I open with sth regarding her bio or one of her pictures.
With 8+, I usually go cocky funny. And I never compliment a girl. Theses girls receive dozens of compliment openers from beta males daily, so **** that bull****.

I also tried "Give me your number" as the first message, and surprisingly it worked 30% of the time lol. I also sometimes just send a lyric from a song I like, and they either complete it or say omg I love this song and this gets the conversation starting, then I sexually escalate it when I feel there's enough comfort.

Openers should always be something cocky/funny or teasing her about something, never compliment as an opener.

Is there like a 2+2 for tinder? I suck at it. Lots of matches but bad at progressing

Cold10, you must be somewhat attractive right

I guess. I mean you need to to be successful on tinder.

RIP thread


wish I had something to contribute

Since the thread is dead, I suppose I'll chime in.

Currently in Barcelona. Met an Australian girl in Split, Croatia and after a few hours of chatting in a bar agreed to meet up with her here in a week (our traveling schedules were such that we couldn't meet up again before now). Hoping I read this one right.


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Tinder just came out with going out in a group feature. Going to test it out tonight, it's pretty cool.

I think I found my place to live. I find out forsure on Monday if I'm moving in, move in date change to Sept 1st so it's just a huge load off my mind and finances so I should be a lot more fun

Definitely interested in hearing about this. How's it work?


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Enable it in your settings. On your home screen will be a going out button. You click it and then can add people into your group that you have on fb who also have tinder. You can add a one line status to your group so you can put a nickname or like the bar you're going to. Then when you're swiping a mixture of regular ppl and groups will pop up. If you match a group everyone in both groups can all talk in one group chat. My friend put me in one last night aroud 8pmish and it seemed to expire around noon today.

I wasn't hands on with any of it since I was staying in but I'm going to initiate one tonight

I think it flopped a little in Australia when it launched, but i guess it can't be too bad given the fact they've launched it in the US

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