I think at 16 I was envious of people that were gifted a car and impressed by people that bought their own. It's hard when you're that young to separate those feelings from the character of the person so it likely colored my opinion of them. This was of course a function of the demographics of the school I went to.

hi guys

so met with this girl 3 or 4 times, great chemistry, things are really going well. texting almost daily I get the feel that she really likes me (draws a heart on my dusty shoe on one date, makes future plans, constantly asks if im free and wants to see me). saturday she sleeps over and we have a lot of sex. She says she is free wed/thu/fr and wants to meet up. I texr her sunday bla bla and we text a little. ask her tuesday if she is free wednesday, she says no, shes busy (she replied really short, she never did that before). i ask her when she is free. no response. i text her today how her week was and if ill see her on the weekend, again no response. this is really surprising to me as i have already met her sister and she said she really liked me etc etc. i cant figure out why all of a sudden she changed her behavior towards me like that. should i just delete her ? wait ? fwiw i like her

you shouldve stopped contacting her after she said no to the wednesday plans and she was busy.

definitely dont contact her now.

Shes found someone else dude. Girls are very finicky, one day they are into you the next day they don't reply to your texts. Move on and find another girl. It's over.

lol ur bad at sex

pretty standard for you is it? cant say im surprised.

You really think it's because he's bad at sex? I really don't think that's the case. Girls aren't like that if they really like the guy. I've had some great sessions and some bad sessions for the first time. It's not been a factor in my mind on whether or not the girl would see me again.

wsopmichael,

how would you say you find a girlfriend? you pretty much give up on every scenario and think it's totally standard for people to make a connection over 5 hangouts and then just ditch it.

wait for her to initiate contact

and then ill ignore her back !

If played correctly then no, Girls wont just ditch you after a few hangouts if they have a strong connection for you. The mistake most guys make is over per-suing and telling the girl how the feel too early. I read somewhere that it is a scientific fact that women are attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. It's important to keep your value up and not show your cards too quickly, This is why i say seeing multiple girls at once is the best action when you're single. Her knowing other girls are interested in you, brings up your value in her eyes and she will also see you as a prize.

here is the article: http://www.psychologicalscience.org/...e-unclear.html

that makes sense and I think is a good post.

Chances this girl contacts me in the future? She was at the bar I work at on Saturday, eyeing me for most of the night so I chatted her up briefly and she enthusiastically gave me her number.

I know this might be an odd place to ask this, but since it's the best advice thread on 2p2, I figure I'll take a shot.

I'm trying to start networking with comedy writers in and outside of Boston, and am wondering what the most effective way to do it would be? I write for/act/produce/run one of the better sketch comedy groups here, but it's not like I can get anyone from NYC or LA to a show here. Until we start taping video sketches, I feel like just schmoozing and eventually sending them scripts I've written when it's appropriate is all I can do.

none, ignore and move on

So, if you guys remember, a friend of mine set me up with this very cute girl who works in private equtiy. i was nervous she would be like too good for me.* anyway, we got dinner with my friend and her boyfriend 2 weeks ago and i was on my game.* my friend said the girl really liked me so i asked her out again. it took a while to plan, but we got drinks last night and had a great time.* she showed up in shorts and a cute tshirt with no make-up, but still looked really naturally pretty. long brown hair and bright blue eyes.* and i put out the bait for her to talk about hating poor people or being elitist and she passed every test with flying colors.

*we went back to her place and talked for a wihle and wemade out for a long time.* after, she kind of exposed some insecurity saying "im sure you have lots of girls on your schedule but lets hangout soon" so i was like "what? me? noo" and she laughed.* i definitely think she might be a clingy type, but honestly, if she's as cute and cool as she was last night, i wouldnt mind.*

my problem is as follows.* i had that girl from okc who i went out with 4-6 times, and had sex with 5 or so times.* at one point early last week we were texting a lot every day.* she is a +++++ cool girl and funny, but not as hot as i would like for a gf.* she texted me last night asking me what i was up to this week and i havent replied.* i would like to "break-up" with her but don't want to hurt her feelings.* what do i tell her? and how do i do it?* i'd think calling would be the best route but she has told me multple times taht she hates talking on the phone.* and waht is my rationale?* a week ago she probably inferred (justifiably so) that i was really into her....

There's nothing to ignore or move on from. She's just a girl who's number I got while working who would have been number four in the rotation of girls I'm seeing. I just thought it was very strange that she apologized, said the timing was bad, and offered friendship when the only interaction we had was asking how her night was going and getting her number. Normally girls will just not respond.

Why with the asterisks?

With nothing else, 20-30%. It would have to not work out with the other dude soon enough that she hasn't forgotten about you and still thinks it's worth contacting you.

(1) You're investing way too much in private equity girl after precisely two meetings.

(2) It's weird as hell that you went out of your way to "test" her on being snobby or whatever. If someone has an elitist personality it'll show up on it's own in normal conversation.

(3) You've gone out with the girl 4 times. Don't make things more complicated than it is. "I've enjoyed spending time with you but I just don't think there's enough here to keep going forward, didn't want to lead you on, blah blah blah."

funky,
i am in a very similar situation as you. please keep me posted with what unfolds.
gL

The privacy equity girl is a friend of a friend who says she's cool. Not saying I'm gonna marry her, just that it madr me realize j don't really like okc girl enough to lead her on.

Isn't finding out about people what dates are for? Re: testing her.

And we've gone out about seven times I'd say.

I mean obviously dates are for getting to know each other and see how compatible you are. You're making it sound like you're trying to bait her into saying negative things about poor people, which would be really strange.

Nah I didn't mean for it to come off like that but can see why you read it that way.

yeah this is how it came across.

Funky, I think you're a good dude so don't take this the wrong way. Your "testing" seems like something that females do to us. Throwing different scenarios out to see what one says and how they react, etc. Just go out and have a good time and let the conversation flow. You seem to pick up girls rather easily (and good looking girls at that), but I have noticed from some of your previous posts that you like to qualify girls into certain groups. For example...She is in private equity so: she likes money, is probably conservative, and thus hates homoesexuals (I know you did not literally write these exact words, however, I seem to remember you making some inference similar to this that came off this way). Obviously, If this was not you then forget what I said.

If you just go out and have a fun time these things will all sort themselves out. She seems like a really cool chick from the short things you have written about her and if a good friend of yours who has similar values to you enjoys her company then...she probably is. I agree that her implying you probably hang out with a lot of girls means that she could be clingy, however, it also means that she really likes you and isn't afraid of showing her hand. Girls like this are awesome because you don't have to worry about them playing games and testing you (unlike you do to them ).

I also think it is unhealthy to think after a couple dates "I could see myself marrying this girl", but it is something I do regularly that is rather hard to get over. I believe it is a function of not "having enough girls on the team" and fwiw...I'm sure this is more common than one might think.

Once again, just go out and enjoy yourself man. You got tons of girls pulling at your coattails and you get to siphon through them and choose which one is right for you. Don't take this for granted!

~JB